The Curse You Gave Me
by SamuraiEmpress123
Summary: It's been five years since the rescue, and Ralph is still haunted with nightmares of his past. Now, he comes face to face with someone he thought he'd never seen again. A twisted chain of memories and revenge brings everything back together...UPDATE SOON?
1. Chapter One

**Disclaimer**: The Lord of the Flies is a novel written by William Golding, and I don't own any of the characters (unless they are OC).

**Chapter One**

All that could be heard was the mad screams of savage boys, their spears raised and their minds set on murder. The blonde boy in the midst could only listen to his own frantic breaths while he scurried over the flaming forest to the light ahead. _Run run run!_ It was clear they were gaining on him and could pounce at any moment. His strength had vanished as quickly as the trees eaten away by flame's fury. _Run run run!_ Tan arms swung wildly towards the upcoming light. _SAVE ME! SAVE ME! SAVE ME!_

"SAVE ME!" The cry echoed off the blackness of the room, yet no one heard. Ralph gasped for air in heated desperation, almost as though his dream was the reality it once was. No…that was a solid five years ago. "It's still so darn vivid," Ralph muttered through his hand, running it every which way on his face to try to end his night sweat. The taste in his clenched mouth grew bitter, bringing forth whatever was eaten earlier. "Oh god…" The gagging echoed off the blackness of the room…and still…no one heard.

Vibrations of the alarm clock disturbed the otherwise quiet morning. Ralph remained in his slumber in hopes of never having to wake. The grey clouds hovered above the bustling boy's dormitory, encouraging consciousness. "Should we wake him up?" "We gotta wake him up!' Two identical voices whispered incoherently back and forth on either side of the blue sheeted bed. The form below them seemed dead to the conversation, but to their surprise, he rose.

"What are you doing Sam? Eric?" The groggy blonde asked, half frustrated and half awake. The two stared at him for a few moments before turning towards each other again. "I told you he would wake up!" "Yeah, but we need to get going!"

Ignoring the argumentative hollering of the twins and not questioning how they got into his room, Ralph reached a hand forth, slamming it down on the wake up to society. His mind had traced back to the night's memories. Such grief they brought him. The feeling of being back on that island surrounded with the hate and losses of the fellow boys who had been there would never leave him it seemed, but that was once upon a time. Ever since the ship had dropped them off, Ralph had seen not a one of them besides Sam and Eric…not a one.

His sweaty palm clasped around a precious golden cross hanging from his neck. Any traces of dents or bending were far gone. Where did they go? Ralph barely even remembered where he'd gotten the necklace from. All he knew was that it was strangely special to him. Strangely… "He's spacing again. I told you something was wrong Sam!" "Ralph, hey Ralph! We need to get going-" "Class is starting in ten minutes. We can't be late to morning prayer."

The two had interrupted a deep thought unintentionally, not noticing how fazed the thinker had become. "Just go without me," was his only reply. The sentence itself seemed to be sin, and sent the eccentric boys into frenzy. "Ralph no! You know that the pastor gets angry when someone skips class-" "And today isn't the day you visit the gr…" "QUIET!"

The duo stumbled back from the wind of the primary word that passed Ralph's lips. "I say SUCKS to school and SUCKS to the pastor! I'm not going! Go without me!" The temperamental boy sank back beneath the sheets, his shell closing. "But Ralph, you're a leader. You're supposed to be there," one of the two, Ralph didn't care which, protested in a tired tone. "How many times do I have to tell you this? I'm not a leader. I never was, and I never will be." _And I never want to be…ever again…_

To Ralph's satisfaction the door shut, opening a new silence to the room. _Why do those idiots always talk about the past?_ A hand pressed into the cool pillow, which a few years ago seemed a luxury. Anything was better than sanded ground huddled close to fearful boys. It was impossible not to remember their hardships, and it was impossible to forget Ralph's change…Everyone's change. The change in the littuns and bigguns alike, the change in the wise Piggy, the change in the spiteful Roger, and the change in the once proud leader Jack.

"Jack…" The name that made Ralph smile and cringe all in the same. Jack was his friend. Jack was his enemy. What was Jack? _What does it matter? Jack is gone, just like the rest. Gone from my life forever._ Reassurance was not working, and Ralph could not help but think of those who lost their innocence on that island. His mind continued its restless thinking for what felt like hours, but what did it matter? Not one thing in this world was dragging him from his solitude…until…

_What's the matter Ralph? Are you afraid? You're supposed to be leader, and look at you! What do YOU have to be afraid of? _"Jack…" _Get up Ralph! GET UP!_ "Jack…" _Do you really think it's all over? Heh, we aren't quite through just yet._ "JACK!"

Springing up from the covers, his light eyes darted every which way. There was no one there. No one. _Why do I keep hearing his voice?_ The voice haunted him day in and day out, never stopping. It was clear at this point that staying in bed was useless. _Darn him…_

Light rapping made its way along the cobblestones on the dreary morning. Ralph held the sides of his grey blazer together as the wind fought him for it bitterly. His black shoed feet quickened in the view of the church that seemed to rule the entire area. The graceful looking people depicted in stained glass stared down shamefully. _Late for prayer! Tsk tsk tsk!_ Heaving heavily against the door, Ralph pulled the large wooden doors open, wincing as they creaked, announcing his late arrival. No one noticed, giving Ralph time to shut the door and start towards the open room. He slid to a stop to dip his fingers within the holy water, gracing himself with the trinity. He sucked in one more silent breath before entering the room.

The space was filled with boys, big and small, praying on their pews silently. At the front, unfamiliar boys in long choir tresses were organized by their leader. The pastor was quick to Ralph's sneaking in, calling him out. "Late again I see Mr. Kenrich." Stopping in his tracks, Ralph swallowed as he was approached by the fast walking pastor who loomed over him like a father. "I was told you were sleeping in..." _Darn those two! They could never stay loyal for more than five minutes!_ "I…I apologize," he said without a second's thought, grinding his teeth anxiously along his lips. "Just don't let it happen again."

Their feet stepped along a red carpet, leading them towards the shining lights and many boys. "I'd like you to meet the St. Michael's school choir. It seems that their church is undergoing some construction and as I always say…" "We giveth as the lord hath taught us to do so," Ralph finished on command. The rest of the lecture was nothing more than buzzed words while the seventeen year old returned to his quiet and listless state. "Now come. As the head of your class, I believe it would be Christian if you greeted them accordingly." _Wonderful. Another pleasant morning. How I wish I'd stayed in bed…_His arm was taken within the older man's warm palm that sailed him across the way. The eyes of his schoolmates were upon him, and Ralph could feel his cheeks burning a noticeable red while he was paraded.

"Excuse me," the pastor interrupted in loud politeness. "The young scholar I was telling you about has arrived." The choir leader, whose robe flourished with the many shades of red, white, and gold, lowered his ready hands patiently and slowly. The pastor began babbling again, giving Ralph time to study the head boy. His rich red locks were longer than most boys'. They waved steadily just above his shoulders, surely concealing his face. His stance was strong, and gave the short, blonde haired Ralph a shiver of fear. _Why…?_

His odd staring stopped with the touch of the pastor's hands pushing down lightly on his shoulders. "Ralph Kenrich, I'd like you to welcome the choir master…" "Merridew," a deep voice interrupted, filling the entire room with its velvety presence. A half turn brought the choir master's eyes to Ralph. "Jack Merridew." A smirk streamed from behind the red bangs that held to the side of the young man's face. Ralph was sure his heartbeats could be heard by everyone else within the room, his body burning with every emotion he'd kept secret. _Jack…Jack…_

Jack lifted his robe slightly to ease the walk down the steps, the distance between them closing. Each step, a louder heartbeat. A flashback of that same boy, his face tarnished with paint and blood. The images that kept Ralph awake every night. This was that boy. The very boy! _Jack! Jack! Jack!_ The last thing Ralph could see was Jack moving faster and faster under the statue of Christ that watched everything below it, and with that last view of movement, Ralph and the floor became one.


	2. Chapter Two

**Chapter Two**

The sour trickles of blood between Ralph's teeth came hand in hand with the throbbing pain that had been pulsing through his tongue. _I can't speak_. Not one part of his body would move by will. It remained flat and convulsing. _I can't open my mouth! I can't breathe!_ The darkness swarmed around him, choking his existence. Something was speaking to him. _"Foolish, foolish boy. Did you think you could escape me? You knew I never left you. I've always been as close, close, close, as I was then. You'll never lose me. Never."_

This menacing voice was pulling the suffering from within Ralph's heart, and surviving in the light seemed hopeless. His thoughts were everywhere, trying to ignore the voice. He wasn't strong; he had no will…no heart. _Maybe I should have died back then. Maybe I should die now… "YES! YES! Give in to your…" _Suddenly, a warm feeling pressed into Ralph's body, snatching him into the light. _Warmth…_

His consciousness was tickled by long red locks rubbing against his pale cheeks. Ralph's light eyes just barely opened to see the freckled face of Jack inches away from his own. "Pastor, where's the infirmary?" Jack asked, moving his attention away from Ralph. "I believe it's inside the school just East of here. I can have someone else…" "No. I'll take care of it. It should take only a little while." As the two talked, Ralph limply watched them, but nothing helped him figure out what was going on. The next thing he knew, he was being hoisted onto his legs and walked down the aisle he had come from.

The floor challenged the unstable boy, going every which way under his feet. "Are you going to be alright Mr. Kenrich?" Jack questioned in a mature tone, different from the one he'd had during their last time together. It bothered Ralph for some reason, and he felt like he almost…didn't like it. "…I'm fine." He dropped his eyes to his feet, trying to figure out something to say. They hadn't seen each other in five years. There should be SOMETHING to talk about…Thankfully; the infirmary door was being opened before the situation got even more awkward.

"Well Mr. Kenrich," the nurse sighed while propping his chin in her soft hand, "The shock from that faint caused those convulsions. Your teeth bit into your tongue as a reaction. You should be very grateful for Mr. Merridew's actions. Otherwise, you might have lost that tongue of yours." Ralph nodded in compliance, his eyes scanning the room for somewhere else to look. They rested upon Jack, who politely sat in a chair against the wall. He caught Ralph's eyes, smiling sympathetically. _Why is Jack acting so…different?_

"Why don't you rest here? I have a few errands to run, but I'm sure Mr. Merridew will be able to look after you." "Of course. Take care of whatever you need to," Jack answered with graciousness, following the nurse to the door. Ralph lay back on the cot with his hands drumming his stomach. _Ask him…_"Do you…?" Ralph started, easing his tone quietly when Jack turned in surprise at the sudden outburst. "Do you remember me?"

His arms held him up so he was able to see Jack's expression. "Do I remember you?" The choir master turned gracefully, cocking his head. "Do I remember you? How could I not remember you…?" A flicker of smile began across Ralph's face, but the red head spoke again. "I just met you." That smile again…That sugary sweet smile. Ralph had grown to hate that smile in the short time he'd seen it. _He doesn't remember?_ This was worse than when he and Jack argued! At least he knew him then. What was this now? Who WAS this boy now?

"Have we met before?" Jack questioned in an interested voice while pulling up a chair to the cot, folding over his robes before seating himself. Ralph had begun lacing his finger around the chain of his golden cross unhappily. _He can't be serious can he? He can't be! Not Jack! Not Jack!_ "Heh, you're joking, right Jack? It's all a joke! You scared me for a second!" The blonde laughed, anxiously waiting for Jack to join him. Nothing. He just sat, a bit drawn back in his chair as he watched Ralph make a fool of himself. "C…Come on Jack! Laugh! Just like you used to do! Be the Jack you used to!" His voice was now a desperate holler, his body language flying every which way. "COME ON!" _Where's the Jack I…I…_

"Mr. Kenrich! Settle down!" Jack shot from his seat in a hurry to pin Ralph's shoulders against the sheet of the cot. "Please! Remain calm or you'll faint again!" "NO! JACK!" The cot shook violently under Ralph's unforgiving thrashes. There was nothing else he could do. His anger and confusion built up into his heart, dragging it down. Ralph had never been disturbed by such a heavy feeling. It made him insane! It made him want to scream and yell! To do things he'd never done before!

His ranting went on for several minutes, slowly fading into nothingness. Jack kept his eyes with Ralph's, the same expression within them. His hands made their way to his forehead, absorbing as much hatred as he could take away. Ralph felt himself falling back into dizziness, and he just quit. It was over. He was acting like such a child! "I'll go get you some water now," whispered Jack who took to the door. When Ralph jilted to rise, Jack's hand waved him back down. He was alone again...just like this morning.

"What the heck was that for!" He grumbled to himself, slapping his forehead in a scolding matter. "What is wrong with me?" Ralph glanced toward the ceiling light. His hair used to cover any light he saw. It protected him. "Stupid hair, I hated it. I like it short. I can see everything." That last sentence wasn't assuring the seventeen year old. Yes, his blonde hair let him see everything, but it was also dangerous. _They all see everything I am. I can't hide my eyes like Jack can. I'm…jealous…_

He didn't want any of those people to see him. If they knew his emotions, they'd take control of him, stringing him up on his own broken wires. Trust was gone from his life. It was crushed just as his wise friend was. It was torn, just like his truthful friend had been. It was lost, like every other person on that island. _Darn this life of mine! _This angst he went through night and day and night and day stopped him from moving on. That life he lived, it was the ball and chain that brought him down.

His black shoes hit the floor and took him to the gateway to the outside. A small bird sang a cheery tune to welcome the world to morning. Ralph pressed a finger against the separation, wishing to be that bird. Free from troubles and society. Free from religion, free from judgment. "Heh. You're so lucky that you're ignorant," he said through a half smile. "Oh? You think so?" At first, Ralph couldn't believe his ears! A bird talking! Then he realized that he'd been caught by the returning Jack who came to his side. "I…I was just…" "Ha ha! It's alright. You're just not close enough."

The older boy sat a dripping cup of styrofoam on the nearby desk, rolling his long white sleeves. He pushed the window open, extending a hand forward. In no time, the curious bird had hopped its way onto its new perch, letting itself be drawn inside. "You really think this bird is lucky Mr. Kenrich?" Jack questioned as he sat upon the windowsill, the light framing his red hair like a halo. Finally! A different conversation! Ralph was surprisingly eager to respond. "Yeah, I do. It gets to go and do what it pleases all the time. It has nothing holding it back. No past, no nothing. I envy that bird…"

Angling his finger, Jack studied the ruffling brown feathers of the creature he held. "Is he really that lucky? He has nothing. All he has is a pair of wings, some eyes, and two small feet. What does he have to live for? What brings him back to his nest every night? Who or what does he run to when the weather takes a turn for the worse?" Ralph swallowed a lump that had settled itself within his throat, choking him as he listened to words of sage like status. They made his heart beat. They made his breaths shorten. They made him…feel.

"I'm sorry, am I going too far?" "NO! No…keep…keep going." Another smile appeared between the freckles on Jack's face, and he happily went on. "A bird is considered lucky to us because he has nothing, but we, Mr. Kenrich, are lucky to him because we have everything. We have society and government to protect us. We have family and friends to run to. We have comfort, happiness, sadness. We have emotion, the key to a life. And most importantly, we have someone waiting for us, wherever we go." _My heart is beating so wildly…_ "Someone we cherish most, and someone who returns that feeling. Someone we lo…"

The small bird fluttered its wings as it became startled by the sudden movement, taking off into the unknown. Jack was thrust into a blind spot. Just as he had gone to form the letters 'v' and 'e', two hands caught the holy colors of his wardrobe, two lips reaching for a destination. A kiss. That's all he saw. That's all he felt.

The jingle of his cross made Ralph fully aware of where he was and what he had just done. He retracted shamefully, trying to force down the weight that remained in his throat. His light eyes widened at the sight of an outstretched cup of pure liquid that was offered to him. "Listen I…" "Why not rest a bit more Mr. Kenrich, hm? I must return to the choir now," The hasty red head said. Ralph nodded solemnly, looking at his reflection in the water. The situation returned to its former position, awkwardness. _Why would I…?_

While Ralph's gaze glazed over with thought, Jack backtracked his steps to his former spot at the door, shutting it gradually behind him before he took off in a fast walk. "Damn it," he cursed beneath his red hair as he began digging through the robes that hung around his thin neck. "He remembered me..." His lips quivered at the very thought of Ralph's. He hated that warmth. No. He liked that warmth… "I promised myself I'd forget him…Ralph…That idiot. That fool…That…" His index finger extended, stretching a golden chain that had been resting within the cloth. A small cross made its way down the necklace, shimmering against the church light as Jack walked among the stained glass saints that looked down upon him.

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Author's Note: I hope you liked this chapter (If you're still reading that is!). It was a bit short, but I got in the symbolism I was hoping to add. The next chapter will most likely be more from Jack's point of view than Ralph's. I love angst! See you next chapter!


	3. Chapter Three

**Chapter Three**

Two fingers dipped into the holy water of the church. They quivered. Those fingers pressed to a pair of thin lips, striping the water down them. They quivered. Oh how those lips had sinned. _For shame Jack! For shame!_ The walls seemed to cry to the stunned red head. It seemed he heard them, because his pace doubled in speed until he was out of their sight. _I have sinned…_

"You've returned Mr. Merridew! How is Mr. Kenrich?" Jack snapped to attention as the old pastor bent down to meet his gaze. "He's fine. Just shaken…I'm sure he'll be back soon," he mumbled, praying the opposite. _I can't even look at that boy_… "Well then, I'm sure you'd like to continue." He outstretched his hand to the boys choir, still standing even after Jack had left. "I told them to sit down, but they insisted on standing. Quite a respectable bunch you have on your hands, Mr. Merridew." "Yes. Very…"

The stage creaked when he took to it, looking directly at the boys, many wiping beads of sweat caused by the heavy lights above them. They stood at attention with the straightness of his hand, signaling them to be ready. "Oh! Mr. Merridew!" "Yes?" "What would the name of this piece be?" Jack turned, facing the audience. "It's called…" The doors were shut, a blonde boy rushing to sit among the crowd, a cup in his hand. As if speaking directly to that boy, Jack spoke. "It's called Song of the Fallen."

He turned only to gesture a beautiful stream of "ahs", and then reached for a black case on his right. First, he lifted a long bow from within it, reaching back down for a violin. The violin was positioned beneath his chin and the first chords were played. A breath and then…

_Once upon a time, I lived in sin_

_Darkness fell upon me_

_The everlasting lord was far away_

_My eyes, they could not see_

_Blood seeped into my fingertips_

_How hard I wished to cry_

_I reached out for the hands I knew_

_But there came no reply_

_So I held my head_

_I held my head to the sand_

_Waiting for the blonde angel_

_My savior from this land_

_The pain is now a memory_

_That haunts me all over again _

_And all I have to sing for you_

_Is the song of the fallen_

_The waves they crash, the sky it shines_

_But never any peace_

_My mind is restless, my heart pounding_

_Where is my sweet release?_

_I walk among the graves by day_

_My tears drowned out by rain_

_Where is that light eyed boy I need_

_To hold me, keep me sane_

_So I hold my head_

_I hold my head to the ground_

_Praying for that one to hear me_

_To comfort with words so profound_

_Heartache is old but this is new_

_I'll bleed alone and then_

_I will sing the only song I know_

_I sing the song of the fallen_

_Please save me from who I have become…_

_So I held my head_

_I held my head to the sand_

_Waiting for the blonde angel_

_My savior from this land_

_The pain is now a memory_

_That haunts me all over again _

_And all I have to sing for you_

_Is the song of the fallen_

_Please take my back to the place, the place that I came from…_

_I hold my head_

_I hold my head to the ground_

_Praying for that one to hear me_

_To comfort with words so profound_

_Heartache is old but this is new_

_I'll bleed alone and then_

_I will sing the only song I know_

_I sing the song of the fallen_

_Please take me back into God's grace_

_I want that light upon my face_

_Help me be who I was then…_

_So I no longer have to sing…the song…of the fallen…_

_Amen…_

The "ahs" died down to a lowly "ooh" with the deep notes coming from Jack's lips. A decrescendo in the violin ended the exquisite piece. All was silent. The blue eyes on the stage scanned the crowd anxiously, surprised to hear the sound of a single person clapping. A blonde in the back row. He stood, putting his palms together as if in prayer again and again, and soon enough, it caught on. In moments, the benches were empty, for all had risen from their seats to applaud the depressing song. Even the old fashioned pastor gave an approving round of applause. Jack exhaled only enough for himself to hear, his eyes looking above him to Jesus. They waited. The statue did nothing but look down on him. _Talk to me…Tell me I'm back in his eyes…_

"Mr. Merridew?" A young choir boy now stood before him. Jack had been too busy staring to even hear the movement of the risers as the others hopped off. "Mr. Merridew, we'd better return before we miss our morning classes." "Right. Of course…" He hurried to put away his instrument, slowly closing the buckles on the case. "How tiresome…" The two congregations mixed for a short period of compliments and excitement while moving towards the door. The tall nineteen year old made his way with ease. He'd never wanted to leave a holy place so badly in his life!

Halfway there, his voice was called in a rather improper fashion. Only one would do so. _Ralph… _In no time, the panting Ralph was behind him, dodging the crowd around them. "Jack…I…uh…Your…your song…" Lifting a red brow, Jack listened with intrigue. "What about my song?" Ralph's black shoes moved him closer. "It-" "RALPH!RALPH!" Two identical voices chirped. The next thing Ralph knew, he was being jerked in the opposite direction, the sea of boys growing more and more between himself and Jack. "JACK!" The red head only gave Ralph a smirk much like the one he used to wear, turning his back. "Until we meet again Mr. Kenrich."

Ralph shot forth a hand in desperation, losing sight of the fiery red hair that slid past the brown doors. "JACK!" Soon enough, the robes of choir boys had disappeared from the room and the bustle was over. Sam and Eric stood before Ralph with pure exhilaration. "THAT WAS JACK! CAN YOU-" "BELIEVE IT!" It would have been natural to slam his fists into their heads. Ralph was so close! SO CLOSE! His fists balled up but remained at his sides. _So close…_ "Yeah. It's pretty amazing," he uttered. _I don't feel like violence today…_

Jack held the main door open for his choir as they piled out, rushing towards the yellow bus that awaited them. Once he was sure the boys were far enough away, he turned the corner to see a boy about Ralph's age waiting for him. His darkened skin was covered by a sleeveless black shirt and torn up blue jeans. Curly black locks hung around all sides of his head, showing only his twisted smile and dark eyes. "Did you see him?" The voice asked in a monotone manner, the teeth of the voice holding tight to a lit cigarette. "Yes." "And?" Jack rubbed the pale skin on the back of his neck while he answered. "He…remembered me." He paused to listen uncomfortably to a deep laugh from behind the dark hair. "Ha, ha, ha! I knew he would. Just as I wanted him to. Now we can go for it!"

The strange being pushed himself off the wall, sliding his boots to a stop. "I can finally get what I want." Jack's eyes narrowed a bit, his voice lowering. "Don't forget your deal to me. You said that if-" "That if you bring him close enough to you for me to finish him off, then I can get you back in the eyes of God. I remember Jack and it's true. Trust me." A tan arm slithered across Jack's robes, bringing him closer to the young man beside him. "It'll be just like old times." "R…Right."

The choir leader, glad for the end in conversation, began back towards his choir. "Hey," the strange one from behind him called. Jack spun to catch a bright red apple in his hands. "You looked hungry. Enjoy it Jack, and don't let me down." "…" Jack curved his fingers around the fruit, returning his walk. "I won't Roger…I promise…" With a final nod, the two old acquaintances went their opposite ways. _Oh God…Ralph…Am I to sin again?_

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Author's Note: WOW! Chapter three is finished! Phew! I most likely won't update for awhile because I have a ton of really dumb projects for school. I'm very excited though! I have a plan for much later in the story. WOO!


	4. Chapter Four

Author's Note: I'M BACK! GIMME A HUG IF YOU'RE STILL READING! I swear, I have been having so much trouble lately, it is quite amazing. I just felt so overwhelmed and didn't know which fic to update, but I've been getting so much positive feedback for this one, that I couldn't resist updating! Hopefully, you'll like this chapter as much as the last ones. This one will be a chapter with all three characters in it somewhat, so yay! Let's all say hooray for angst!

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**Chapter Four**

The all boys school had just been let out into the foggy afternoon of their home. Shirts were loosened, voices raised. The pressure of the lord had lifted into the mist for the day, and the boys could be boys. One lagged behind unusually slow. His black feet seemed to be glued to the hard path beneath him, and he couldn't care nonetheless. His eyes were fixated on the golden trinity on his necklace. _Why did Jack have the same necklace as I did?_

Ralph lingered at the entrance of the school as he pondered. The thought of sharing such an important piece of jewelry with Jack churned his stomach. He'd already kissed him. What else would that accursed cross make him do? "I knew I shouldn't have come today. I feel so sick," Ralph heaved to himself, his legs moving him towards the crowded sidewalks. There was somewhere he needed to go.

Further down the way, St. Michael's school's boys had just left in a similar manner, and one stayed back. The red head opened his umbrella and began his slow walk, feeling eyes watching him as he bit into the red waxy exterior of his apple. Almost immediately, Jack spit it up, his hand covering his mouth to hold in anything else that might come forth. An evil giggle came from beside him, and when he looked, he discovered Roger doubled over in laughter. "What was that for!" Jack coughed, wiping his mouth on his hand.

"I wanted to see how you liked rotten apples. I eat them all the time. How do you think I survive?" Roger's hands were on his lean hips which bent slightly to loom over the hacking red head. "You need to toughen up Jack. What's happened to you?"

"Please don't badger me again. Just get on with it. I thought you were done with me for today." Jack slumped to his jeaned backside, zipping his white sweater jacket to hold his annoyance. Roger rocked on his feet, kneeling in the rain beside the shielded Jack. "Listen man, I needed to see you again because my blood is boiling. I'm going crazy yeah!" Clapping, the enthusiastic young man grinned wider. "I wanna move faster! It's going to be wacco! Awesome! You gotta move faster Jack!"

Jack, who had quietly listened to his partner in soon to be crime, was wildly puzzled with what he meant by 'faster'. With just a turn of his head, the mischievous Roger was able to see his confusion. "If we're gonna finish the kid off, we've gotta move fast. I need you to make a serious move. Make him want you!" His leather boots kicked up water when he stood to light a cigarette. "But why would we kiss ag…" Jack began the sentence before realizing what he'd said. As soon as he shut up, Roger blew a cloud of smoke in his directions, his eyes wide. "You've already kissed!"

"He kissed me. He probably wasn't serious though," the red head reassured, the pink in his cheeks making itself known. This seemed to change everything. Roger let his dripping hair shade his eyes, letting smoke seep in between the jungle of curls. "God Jack, you never cease to thrill me. I already have an idea in mind, so listen up good." Roger pushed up the umbrella so Jack was now exposed and able to listen to the next step in Roger's bizarre plan. _This will be…_

Ralph's golden locks sulked, weighted down by rain that poured upon him. "I'm lost. I have no clue where the cemetery is from here." Feeling just as heavy as his hair, Ralph seemed to wilt more with each further press of his foot. _Weird. My head hurts…_Sniffling, the blonde decided the best option was wandering anywhere that was free to his feet. _Not this feeling again…I'm gonna die…_ Suddenly, the familiar sounds of a violin rang in his ears, beckoning him towards the dock hidden within the fog. Ralph was immediately hypnotized, blindly stumbling towards it.

The fog peeled away his years as he pulled through it, and by the time he was at his destination, he was a little boy with tears in his eyes. Lost. The music was the only thing that kept his heart beating, and soon, its owner became clear. Sitting there with his same natural poise, Jack Merridew held his violin, his body motioning the notes to bring Ralph, his voice answering Ralph's question. _Where am I?_

_Come to me boy of sadness_

_My embrace takes your cold_

_I'll understand your pain for now_

_So come sit with me_

_On the hill, we'll be for now_

_I'll try to cheer you up_

_Because you're different for me_

_I care about you, I guess_

_So try to find me here_

_Here amid the sea_

_I promise you now_

_I'll be here for you_

_So stop those childish tears_

_And we'll be happy here for now_

_You can be mine as I am yours_

_Beginning the strawberry romance_

By this time, Ralph had collapsed beside Jack, shivering with some unknown feeling of sickness. "Ralph!" He exclaimed in surprise, casing his violin and scooping Ralph's upper half into his kind arms. His crossed legs made an excellent pillow for the stunned young man who just stared up at the nineteen year old in wonder. "Why would you be in a place like this Ralph? I'd think you'd be praying at your dormitory by n…"

"D…Don't talk to me like my mother! I was just trying to go to the cemetery!" Ralph stuttered, a strangely cold manner in his voice. "Cemetery? Whatever for?" Jack inquired, hiding whatever hurt he'd have from Ralph's tone. "You should remember…It hasn't been THAT long since those two died…" _Those two?_ Jack's light eyes shut for a moment, the cold rain making it harder to think straight. "SIMON AND PIGGY! C'mon Jack! Don't tell me…" Ralph softened a bit, the red in his face become more apparent. "Ralph, I'm sorry. I guess five years have taken its toll. I want to forget all that anyway…It makes me unhappy."

Ralph crossed his arms impatiently in disagreement while he watched Jack look towards the sea, his eyes distant and his hair tossed with the wind and wet with the rain. "Do you know what makes me happy Ralph?" Ralph began to ask what, but was silenced with a sweet strawberry fruit making its way into his lips. Gagging before chewing, he eventually got it between his teeth and down his throat. "WHAT WAS THAT!"

"Come on! You're not that dense are you, it's called a strawberry," teased Jack as he popped on into his own mouth. "I hate apples, so I have strawberries. That makes sense doesn't it?" Ralph's head bobbled slightly as Jack flexed his knees. "I…I dunno. Why are you acting all weird Jack?"

"Ha ha! Am I Ralph?" Behind the freckles flashed a smile that Jack had never shown before. Ralph was caught off guard. _I feel so hot. _While Ralph had his hand over his eyes, Jack glanced behind him with a squint, seeing nothing more than a booted foot that turned the corner and a newly dropped cigarette butt. _Damn he wants me to work fast._ "Ah…Ah…Ah…CHOOOOOOOOOO!" The unexpected sneeze sent Ralph sprawling upward, face to face with the shocked Jack. The red flush was all over now, and Ralph was seeing stars around his guardian. "I should have seen this sooner. You're getting sick," Jack said with sudden urgency. Ralph dropped back down, clenching his teeth as he held his hands on his pounding head. "Agh…Geez…my head…"

Another strawberry found its way to his mouth, shutting him up while Jack opened an umbrella. "You've gotten delicate Ralph. You should be able to weather a hell of a lot more than rain," Jack joked, his hand finding its way to his zipper. "What are you doing Jack!" Yet again, a sweet delight fumbled his wording, giving Jack time to remove his clothing and reach down to lift Ralph.

This was the first time in a long time Ralph had been pressed into Jack's skin. There was a large difference this time. His once rough tan skin had turned soft and pale. The intense brutality of the island hadn't seemed to be anywhere on his body anymore. He didn't have much trace of stomach muscle, but no fat either. Just a long, thin stomach. All the muscle remained in the arms that held him while a sweater built pillow was created on the spot. Jack dropped Ralph back, smiling pleasantly again. _It's now or never. Roger says so…_

"Hey J…" By this time, Ralph was fully expecting a strawberry, but wasn't ready for what came with it. Jack was far closer than before, his lips bringing the treat to Ralph's. _What the hell…?_ Swallowing, Ralph felt the heat of the kiss rushing through his already enflamed body. He was drowning in his own confusion, and Jack was just making the waves rise higher above his head. "How was that?" Jack asked in a satisfied voice, licking his lips of the reminisce of strawberry. Ralph's hands found there way to covering his eyes again, the whole thing a blur. _I can't figure anything out. What does he want from me? What do I want from him?_

The cool press of a cross dragged across Ralph's nose as Jack pressed his lips to the burning forehead, reassuring him of his suspicion of fever. "Poor thing. The devil himself seems to have given you the flames of hell, you're so warm," the sympathetic boy whispered. "What do you want from me Jack?" Ralph tried to turn away, unable to even move an inch. "That's a good question. I should probably ask the same someday, huh?" Jack chuckled, locking eyes with Ralph for a moment. "I'm just doing what I have to."

"What do you…?" Ralph tried to turn his head away, but Jack's lips hit their target, his arms pulling on the sleeves of his shirt beneath Ralph to bring him up close to him. All breathing seemed impossibly for Jack was not planning on leaving anytime soon. For awhile, Ralph could only lie in sickness, a burning head and a pounding heart. His eyes looked over the boy above him, not the same boy he was five years ago. He was a different boy…_Is this really Jack?_ Unconsciously, his quaking hands began walking up to Jack's shoulders to bring him closer. Once they were pressed together completely, Ralph was able to close his eyes and reciprocate with his own lips.

This time, Jack was a bit off guard, but overall content with the way things were going. He pushed forward a bit more, his arms wrapping around the burning waist beneath him. It seemed Ralph had regained innocence since their last unfortunate time together. He was so much more dependant now, and Jack wasn't about to leave him. He wanted to take care of him…He wanted more…He wanted…_Wait. This is a plan…I shouldn't be taking this so seriously…or else…_

The drawing away of Jack's much desired lips struck Ralph with consciousness. He hurriedly rubbed his blurring eyes, panting so heavily his breath shown in the midday air. "Well now, I think we get it, don't we Ralph?" The smiling red head questioned standing and brushing himself off. "Let's get you somewhere warm." Ralph had sat up in a daze, watching Jack flip his sweater onto his pale shoulder. "Let's go," he said with strain as he lifted Ralph onto that same shoulder, the umbrella in his other hand. "W…Where are you taking me?" Ralph huffed, letting his weight fall on Jack. "Somewhere warm I said!" The stroll began, and even though he was anxiously uncomfortable, Ralph decided it was best to let it be, and eventually, the bumps lulled him to sleep.

Jack looked back, smiling slightly to see his patient in his rainy bliss. "You sure have changed Ralph. You're actually…pretty cute now…" Jack was feeling aware of his change as well. He licked his lips a few more times as if looking for a leftover of Ralph's taste. _I can't actually be falling for him, can I?_

A pair of dark eyes watched the unusual sight pass by him, a smirk stained on the face that held those eyes. "Well Jack, this isn't quite what I expected." The eyes peered to a stop watch that flashed the numbers 10:23. "That's pretty long for just a second kiss. I guess I should congratulate him, but not if he's taking this too seriously." After a long sigh, the now laughing young man began walking in the opposite direction. "This is going to be more fun than I thought. I can't wait to see what happens next."

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Author's Note: Me either Roger, me either. XD. This chapter probably seemed a little weird, but I'm proud of myself. This is the first nonschool related thing I've written in about a month. If you are still reading, I thank you, and I'm sure I'll find time to add another chapter! ANGST! Now I have to work on my anime fanfiction. I brought this on myself I suppose.


	5. Chapter Five

Author's Note: Wow. I haven't updated this story since summer. It's kinda sad, but yeah. My summer was awful, and school is even worse. I won't be able to update this fanfic too frequently, but I'll try my best. As long as someone's reading, someone's writing.

**Chapter Five Part I**

The haze of sweaty sleep brought a ringing to the burning red ears that kept themselves hidden beneath a curtain of blonde hair. The mattress he lay upon was much too soft to be his own. The covers that sheltered him were too comforting and navy blue. This room was not the dingy surrounding of the dormitory he was forced to live in everyday. In fact, a place this wonderful was not something Ralph was familiar with at all. _Am I dead…?_

Though he was having a hard time hearing, a strange buzzing coming from the other side of the room was brought to his attention. Slowly, he turned his damp body in a half circle, creeping past the covers to see his wet savior pinned against the wall. Or at least, that's what the blur of his eyes showed him. Ralph was sure he was seeing another person who was holding Jack fast to the wooden wall. _Jack_… A luminous light seemed to drift closer to the pale form surrounded by red locks. Was this a wild figment of his imagination? Was it a dream? "Jack…Jack!"

Ralph raised his voice with all the might he could muster, but unfortunately, it seemed only a whisper to the actual world around him. _D…Damn…_ Desperation pulled Ralph's fingers past the sheets. Gravity took advantage of his weak body with a forceful slam into the sea of blue carpet. This must have caught the attention of the blurry forms, for the one in a dark shadow appeared at his side in minutes. The only thing Ralph could make out was… "Better…dead…yet." He swung his head dizzily, mumbling in an incoherent fashion until he was lifted back onto the cloud that had carried his slumber. Another jumbled set of words lay close to his ear. "Please…die…now…" _What? That sounds like…Jack…? He wants me dead?_

"You always roll over in your sleep. You just never want to stay put, do you?" Jack sighed, sitting back in the wooden chair he placed beside the bed. "You always have to save someone, don't you? I should be thanking you. I really got hurt, you know?" His quivering hand rubbed his shoulder, moving to eyelevel to reveal a rosy streak of blood running down his ivory flesh. "What am I doing…?" Jack watched over the restless sleeper while reflecting on the cause of his new wound.

His hand had been wet from the rain earlier, and turning the brass knob was a slippery pain. Ralph continuously turned from stomach to back, putting a kneading pressure into the tops of Jack's revealed shoulders. _You just don't stop moving… _"Man, you're both helpless," a gruff voice chortled while a hand roughly twisted the knob, flying open the door as fast as it could. Jack, who had straightened up immediately, slouched slightly with an exasperated exhale of breath. "What are you doing here Roger? You said you were going to contact me la—."

"Shut up! Geez, you are such a Catholic!" The less than caring Roger unlatched the buckles on his mud dressed boots and dragged them slowly by the doorway, much to the dismay of his comrade. "What wrong have I done that has brought about such derogatory terms? Aren't you above that yet Roger?" Scolded the preoccupied choir boy, who had taken it upon himself to remove Ralph's damp blazer. "Thank you for the lecture, but I'm the only one givin em out. I did my job, unlike you."

Roger stretched his lean form from edge to edge of the bed, letting his fingers dangle against the carpeting as clothes were tossed every which way. "What are you talking about! I went with every request you demanded. Seduction, that's what you asked for!" Jack gritted his teeth in guilt to hear Ralph moan, his eyelids holding shut tightly in reaction to the sound. The dark locks of Roger's hair lifted slightly to get a full view of Jack who had just finished lighting a few scented candles to sooth the blonde patient. "What more do you want from me now?" The malicious manipulator snorted at the sound of Jack's hushed tone. "CAN'T HEAR YOU JACK! WHAT!"

Jack moved his fingers to his own lips in panic, hoping to convince the punkish boy to lower his voice, but it only turned up his volume. "JACK! I CAN'T UNDERSTAND Y…" The whip like sound of the slap that followed the angered red head's hand caught Roger in the strangest possible situation he'd been in for years. Rolling off the bed, his ominously dark eyes narrowed while staring at the plain ceiling above him. Suddenly, he unfolded his crushed arms, stifled laughs passing between his sharpened carnivorous teeth. "You…you…you cannot be serious…"

The skeleton like finger curved to motion Jack over Roger, whose smile was from ear to ear. "You little preacher boy…You think you…You think you can hit me just like you used to? You think you can treat me like that little sidekick I used to be? YOU ARE DEAD WRONG!" Like the animal he truly was, Roger growled ferociously, slamming Jack's now frail body into the ground, followed by a loud THUNK of his head against the thin line of carpet, covering the unforgiving wooden floor. "Now you listen to me," Roger warned darkly, his eyes visible clearly for the first time as his gaze dove into Jack's innocent fear. "You ARE going to listen to me. That's the ONLY way this will work out in the end. I've told you over and over again!"

"I don't understand what you mean! I DID WHAT YOU SAID!" Jack struggled to get his knees beneath Roger's heavy press, but to no avail. "NO! You did NOT do everything I said! One kiss was all we were going for, not a ten minute love scene!" Roger's tan fingers slowly tightened their grip on Jack's wrists, burning them into the carpet. The sadistic smile grew with a scream of pain. "This is what you get for screwing up! Just like before! Your screw ups bring you pain! Following Ralph brings you pain, don't you get it!"

A tremble waved down the feeble force Jack tried to use against the dominant demon. The last ounce of vigor seemed to drain away while Roger's nails made their way to his arms, finding wounds leftover from the deepest secret still untold. "You don't want to start this again do you?" Roger questioned, leisurely picking at the gaping scars as if orchestrating the cries that came from below him. "STOP! STOP! PLEASE!" Jack begged in a pathetic desperation which couldn't have made Roger any happier.

"You've fallen so…so far down. You're in hell Jack. I know, because I'm here too." Tears had already welted into the crystal mirrors of Jack's eyes. "Ooh Jack…" Roger cooed in a softer tone, lowering himself into a resting position so the two were chest to chest, and face to face. "You know I love you. You know I care for you more than anyone else in the world…" _Liar…liar…_ "So…So hard to believe…" Jack grunted, pushing himself up to fling Roger back in much more violent force than he'd planned.

Retreating to the wall, the winded young man was only given a moment to catch his breath before Roger had his wrists within his grip again. "Don't you dare go denying something like that! I saved your ass and you're going to repay me! You're going to belong to me!" He raged in the deepest tone he'd reach through the argument. Jack released a small gasp after Roger's pair of dagger like incisors broke the skin of his neck, Roger's only way of raw affection. "Be flattered because I love you," he mumbled while his tongue greedily took in the cheery red blood atop the milky white skin.

No words were able to find their way out of Jack's lips, and his eyes just kept with the picture of Jesus watching him blankly from the wall. _Why are you doing this to me? Am I truly to be the devil's lover? _"There now, it all makes sense to you doesn't it?" Roger whispered, tracing his teeth along Jack's features, stopping at his cheek. "I need you and you need me. That's all. Just do what I tell you, and everything will be just how we want it…" Jack swallowed slowly, his eyes watching in horror at the closeness of Roger's lips, dripping with freshly drawn blood. "I…I…" Another loud thud hit the floor, but this time it was made by another. "Ralph!" Jack exclaimed in shock, sliding up against the wall to his feet. "Tsk. Guess I have to be leaving then Jack, but you remember what I said and don't screw up again…"

Slowly, Roger loomed over his helpless prey who had just taken to the floor, still dangling from the bed. "Heh, better not be dead yet. I have a lot to get revenge for." Curling his lips as if to growl, Roger rolled his tongue close to Ralph's coloring ear. "And keep away from Jack. I won't tolerate anything more than what I ask for. You already stole him once, but never again." The last thing the feral beast did was rebuckle his boots and give Jack a bloody smile to remember. He knew he'd broken Jack once again, and left with utter satisfaction.

_What has happened to me…?_ Jack remained pressing into the wall, the blood making a small river into the crevices of his neck. He was on a chain, an endless chain. Roger, for now, was God. Jack could not defy his will…could not escape him. After another moment of shock, he trudged to the mirror and looked at his weary body. Blood and tears, just like before. _I'm dirty. I'm a sinner…_ A quick glance at the unforgiving scars on his arms launched the final wretched spear into his body.

With what was left of his consciousness, he drew Ralph into his arms, which he had become rather accustomed to. For a moment, he allowed Ralph to rest on his clean shoulder, small whimpers and breathes coming from both of them. "Please don't you dare die yet Ralph. I think I need you…I know I need you. I'm going to hell so please stop me…please…" Jack begged, his tresses hanging over his eyes, wiping any trace of a tear. _Help me…_ Ralph slept heavily as he was cried upon and embraced tightly, his slumber being the only comfort Jack would experience that day.

Now he was the guardian, watching down with pride. Every now and again, the one he guarded would do something to cause a stir in the red headed protector, but as soon as Ralph settled once again, curling beneath the sheets, Jack would breathe a sign of relief. Once though, it seemed the nightmare was too much, and Ralph twitched uncontrollably, his breath hitching uncomfortably. _You can't get any peace either, can you? Of course not…as long as I'm around…you won't be._

Hesitantly, he made his way beneath the mountains of blankets, reaching for Ralph's clammy hand. "Miserable…" Pressing their foreheads together, the fever seemed to burn even hotter than during his previous check. "Hell spreads fast, doesn't it Ralph?" Jack said aloud, knowing he would get no response. "Maybe…there is some heaven left in us? Or at least you…" With unsteady hands, Jack unzipped the already wet jacket he'd covered Ralph with earlier, laying it over the chair beside the bed. Slowly, he lowered himself over Ralph, taking in a deep breath at the intense heat the boy held. _I promise I'll change this somehow. I've got to save you somehow…even if I fall into hell because of it…_Pressing his ear to Ralph's chest, the slow heartbeats gave Jack a small sense of security, giving him an opportunity to rest among the heat.

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Author's Note: This chapter seemed kinda rushy, but I'm trying to finish this before I have to go to bed. Sorry if you don't like it! And no, Roger is not a vampire. His teeth are just sharp from all the meat he's been eating since his time on the island and afterwards. I just thought it would be a good add in. I've made him pretty sadistic…but you can still see a lil something else. I split this into parts because this chapter became a flashback, and I didn't want it to go on too long. The second part of the two part will be Jack and Ralph, and we'll find out more about what they both went through during the five years after the island(why Jack is the parallel of his LOTF self). We'll also learn about Jack's mystery scars and many other things! I'll update when I can!

Thank you for reading thus far!


	6. Chapter Five Part II

Author's Note: I'm going to try updating this story more frequently, and I'm considering stopping my other story so I can handle this one. If I do this, I will have to stop updating this story for Winter Break and such, but I will not abandon in. Don't worry! Anyway, this chapter will probably have a lot of dialogue and will unfold the plan of our characters. It's pretty much a relationship 180. We go from Roger and Jack to Jack and Ralph.

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**Chapter Five Part II**

A grungy mix of drying blood and cigarette smoke seeped into Ralph's sore throat, burning the already bright red inside. He sat up with a startle only to realize his was completely covered by another moist body. "What are you doing…?" Ralph asked lamely for he was not aware of Jack's bravery and true intention a few hours ago. "Relax, I didn't do anything. It's just something I learned from a friend, okay?" Ralph's pale eyes followed Jack's dripping hand to the ash tray at the bedside, which had grown a field of crushed cigarette butts.

"That's disgusting," Ralph groaned with a distasteful frown on his face. Jack just stared down at him, no answer. "Oh, and if you're trying to heal that wound," Ralph began, pointing to where Roger's teeth had preyed upon, "Or THOSE ones," he added, now pointing to the twin slashes of freshly drawn blood that lay between Jack's wrist and elbow, "You shouldn't be swallowing smoke." Twitching slightly at Ralph's judgment, his guardian found no way to cover up what had gone on. _So shameful! I bet he already knows…_ "Are you gonna flat out tell me or do I have to drag it out of you?"

Struggling to get up, Ralph rested his back against the sturdy headboard, pushing out an exasperated breath to show how sheer movement had become too much for him. "I know when I've been dragged into something that isn't in my favor. Start talking." The sudden unkind glare reflecting in Ralph's eyes made Jack even more self conscious. He couldn't speak a word with Ralph's inquisitive words and cold stares. "You're easier to talk to when you're sleeping," he commented while getting to his feet and pointing to the mahogany chest at the other corner of the room. "You should find some of my old pajamas in there…they'll fit you better."

"And where are you going Jack? Looking for a kitchen knife?" That one comment froze the bleeding youth in his tracks, his hand slamming into the wall. _How does he know…?_ It would seem Jack's secret had been found out, but Ralph's only reason for the question was from what he had heard, or thought to have heard during his rest. _Please…die…now…_ The three words kept repeating in his mind, never letting him forget who Jack REALLY was. _Go ahead and try to kill me. I knew you could never change… _He continued to watch the red head until he had disappeared beyond the kitchen doors.

_I've gotta get out of here…_ Though it took a grueling few minutes, Ralph was able to get his feet stably placed on the ground. "Ge…ez…" Passed a mumble through his lips while his eyes struggled to pick one door out of the many he was seeing before him. The room would not halt its movement, daring him to attempt escape. It was almost a too perfectly played out plan and Ralph had stumbled right into it. Disbelief crossed the feverish face as the tense tapping of a knife against a counter drummed within his ears. _Oh lord…Oh God!_ A rush in the veins, it was coming back again. It was glazing over the aqua stained in Ralph's eyes. He was the hunted, their prey. _You cannot escape the darkness. Embrace it. Let yourself embrace the bloodshed! FEEL IT!_

Though his eyes were wider than ever, all the young boy could see was darkness. A faint yet menacing voice echoed along the walls of his mind as if to draw him in. _"I'm still close to you as always. Watching over you. I'm still in control, even after they've died! Until you all die, I'll be here! Join me Ralph!" _The dripping pig's head moved closer and closer into Ralph's sights as it had during their first meeting. "Not…not you! NO! I'm done with these dreams! I FINISHED WITH YOU!" The drip drop of blood kissed Ralph's lips with a foreshadowing warning. _"If you want a life to live, then return to me. COME BACK!"_

"COME BACK! RALPH COME BACK!" A dry moan responded to the voice calling him back into the light. Jack desperately jolted the collapsed boy whose eyes slowly returned to their center, darting in wild panic. The pain slightly receded with a cold compress's chilling hold on his flesh. "Why won't you listen to me?" Jack scolded gently with one grunt when lifting the once again incapacitated blonde. _What was he screaming about?_ The bed sighed with Ralph's added weight while Jack threw a random pair of pajamas in his direction, his back turned in respect.

The flannel's slip against Ralph's damp skin kept the room from complete silence, for neither one nor the other wanted to be the first to speak. Every now and then, a hoarse cough shook Ralph's hands and Jack would turn slightly, only to return to staring at the wall as soon as Ralph recovered. A game of suspicion. Someone had to break…"Can you at least tell me…why I need to die?"

Ralph tapped two of his fingers on the cold compress, his eyes keeping with Jack's back. "Why do you need to kill me?" The question was asked in a silent tone, so silent that Jack barely heard it. Possibly because he was astounded that Ralph hadn't noticed what he'd thought. "There's no point hiding it from you," sighed Jack as he slumped beside Ralph on the bed's edge, giving a little space. The red head made sure no eye contact was possible because he already had a lump of guilt building in his throat, and looking into Ralph's building distrust would make the feeling grow twice as large. "Do you remember five years ago…at the trial for Simon and Piggy's murders?"

"What about it?" The past was clawing its way to the surface, Ralph could feel it. "You spoke out against Roger and I. The speech you gave was said to have moved the entire courtroom to tears, much to our dismay. The two of us, as well as several of our past followers, were sent to rehabilitation centers. We spent our years among others who'd committed heinous crimes. Everyday…I was forced to listen to sob stories and lectures about the 'real' world. Everyday, I dressed and lived within white. That color became so disgusting. Life itself was hell on earth. I wanted to do anything I could to escape it."

Now the lump was being passed. Ralph knew every detail of his speech in the courtroom five years ago. It was talked about much thereafter, and was still played often in his dreams. HIS speech was what sealed the fated envelope. He sent Jack to that vile living. _No wonder he wants me dead…_ "My mind…" Ralph's daydreaming caused him to miss the last statement, forcing Jack to repeat it. "I lost my mind…I couldn't hold myself together and pieces were flying out. I needed an escape, anything."

A deep swallow could be heard between the two as Jack lifted his forearms before their vision. Jagged scars cut a tale into his skin; the two freshly drawn ones adding color to the past markings. The now apprehensive Ralph tried averting his eyes, only to find the even more painful expression on the choir boy's face was harder to lay eyes on. "I know it's a sin to cut oneself, but what more could I do? Before long, it was even more than death I wanted. I wanted everything horrible in the world to be hurled at me at the very same time. I needed pain and torture because those fools made me believe I deserved it."

"Jack…I'm s…" "No…Sorry isn't the thing Ralph. You did the right thing, but the world…they did the wrong thing by treating young men in such a way. They knew what I did, and many were so against me, they went along in so called ignorance. They knew I'd stolen a knife and splattered my own walls with my wrist's blood…It had to have been premeditated…they wanted me dead."

Dead. The world wanted Jack dead and Ralph living. What could he say? Jack's story wasn't even finished, but Ralph was already absorbing an extreme dose of guilt. "How close were you to dying?" He questioned with slight hesitation in his tone. Jack's answer was surprisingly immediate. "One night…it just all seemed to flow out. I stared at the white ceiling…I was almost gone, but that's when he found me." "…Roger?" "Roger…"

Deep breathes were heard from both ends as if the tension was cementing a wall for them during the explanation. Roger, the most heart stopping word in the sentence. "He bandaged me up with wraps he'd stolen since he…knew about how frequently I'd been self mutilating. He ever stole food for me since I needed my strength. The only part of my body I could move for weeks was my lips. Our reunion was much more than I thought it would be. He'd just sit and speak to me for hours, since I never responded. That hellhole robbed me of any words I'd known to speak or wanted to speak. Roger gave life back to me…"

_Roger was never that compassionate…Never…_ "I know what you're probably thinking Ralph," Jack added in a quieter tone, drawing his knees into his chest tightly. "He wasn't the violent and cold hearted person we knew then…or now. It would seem that he'd been treated better. He was seen as a victim of my influence; therefore, he was loved and pitied. At first, I was angered that he was treated better than me, especially considering he acted against Piggy alone, but he got into my skin. He even taught me violin. He said it was the closest thing to actual cutting…the motion of the bow…"

"I don't understand. What does this have to do with my death?" Ralph interrupted, partially impatient as Jack reminisced. "You were brought up often and he hated you as much as I did. That's when I found the monster's heart. He grew evil as time passed within the white walls, and he was only playing a role so he could escape. He told me of his plan. He wanted to get out and find you…He wanted your life ruined then destroyed." "You went for it…?" The single nod Jack assured Ralph it was true. He was hated and they BOTH wanted him dead.

"I wanted to please Roger any way I could. I began building the choir boy persona all over again, volunteering at the church beside our institution for everything I could. In no time at all, we were said to have been 'cured' and we were able to take our victorious leave. Ever since that time, Roger has showed his true self…" _That must be the Roger that we knew way back when…_ "Roger had amazing connections and the next thing I knew, we were hiding ourselves in the closest church in relation to yours and watching your every move." _Every move?_

"You…!" Ralph suddenly sprung to his feet, dizzying himself into a stumble. "You…were so…" His sentence muffled into Jack's bare chest as he fell into the welcoming elder. "I know… and I didn't want to continue. Somewhere along the line, religion brought me back to who I was and I wanted to part from the plan, but Roger…when I told him…he showed his beast like behavior and…" His wounded arms pressed Ralph closer in hopes for small comfort as Jack's pale face began matching the color of his hair in shame. "He made sure I knew never to speak against him again…He abused me physically for the first of many times…"

"I'm not sure I get…" "He raped me…That's when my entire personality, the one I'd gained on the island and the one after my 'institutionalizing' vanished. I'd been dominated and he planned on keeping me that way. My strength disappeared and I turned into this frail choir boy you see before you…I'm just a body to be used for his pleasures and his plan and he'll never let me forget that." Ralph's hand had crept its way up to the bite wound left behind, and he immediately knew who left it. "But now that you're telling me this, aren't you in trouble? You said he has connections and has been staking me out. How do you know he's gone?"

Ralph could feel the slow dragging breath that hung between Jack's lips as he thought for a moment. _I must have made him forget...It's my fault this entire thing happened anyway… _"Well damn…I guess I'm once again the leader of all our misfortunes, huh?" Ralph joked in an attempt to play off the cheerless tone Jack had taken, but it was useless. Jack just remained holding tight, his arms shaking slightly while blood began slowing its flow at a painful rate. "I'll die if that's what will get you out of Roger's way. When it comes down to me living and you being with that idiot, I'd rather I died. I always hated Roger anyway…Okay?"

THUMP! The only sound Ralph heard before opening his eyes to the ceiling, the pressure of Jack's now sweating body melting him into the warm sheets. "NO! No more pity! Not from you Ralph! I just…need your help," mumbled Jack almost unconsciously. The small chains holding their crosses ground together as Ralph's flesh peeked out from the top of the loose clothing. _He's actually asking me for help...He really does want to change…_"What do you want me to do…? Our plan's countering his, if that's what you're thinking…and we're both in danger," Ralph added, possibly to ignore the sexual tension building with each drop of sweat on Jack's chest. "Right now…Just don't talk. It doesn't help. Just…"

Another sentence lost within an unexpected kiss, a heated kiss. Ralph widened his blue eyes, sinking further into the blankets in sudden shyness. _Something's…going to…_ "I don't get you Jack…What do you want me to do? Say it…You want my help…now say it…" "Right now…" _What am I doing..? _"Right now, just receive God's gift from me. Just let me give you myself for now, just take it. Not the Jack who slaughtered pigs and covered himself in blood…and not the Jack who works as a puppet for a sadistic psychopath…Just let the lonely choir boy find someone in you for now…please…" _Take me as I am now…_

"J…Jack," Ralph whispered almost breathlessly as he was carried away in the words played in his ear. He swallowed clearly, no guilt trailing his new anxiety. His arms rested fully against Jack's back as he pressed closer. Ralph forcefully shut his eyes for a moment, shaking his eyelids as he was taken into another kiss. "I'll…h...help you…" The last word spoken before intensity overcame the fever. Breaths became short and hot, pain subsided by passion. _Jack…I feel…you…_

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Author's Note: Wow, what an end! I know it's only chapter five, but I think this fit in perfectly. We see a lot of vulnerability to both Ralph and Jack in this chapter and it seems a bit weird, but I needed to portray them differently in this chapter to show how much they've changed. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I pray for a faster update!


	7. Chapter Six

Author's Note: The previous chapter left us in quite a situation, didn't it? I just hope I'll be able to keep with this story because I really enjoy it and I hope those reading it do too.

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**Chapter Six**

The thick scent of chicken soup slithered into the room and beneath the sweaty sheets that covered an enervated Ralph. The aroma was so welcoming, almost exactly the same feeling he got as a child at home with his mother. "You could show a little enthusiasm. I didn't hurt you that badly, did I?" Jack's voice mocked playfully from outside of Ralph's shell, drawing the wonderful smell closer. The smiling choir boy traced his hand along the curved mountain of a body on his bed. Slower and slower, he lifted his fingers and replaced them at their starting point, enjoying Ralph's tickled twitches until he pushed himself up into a seated position.

"Would you stop it?! Geez Jack!" Seeing the devious half grin already on the freckled face made Ralph even more ill tempered. "You know what!? I'm tired, sick, and thanks to you, I'm sore as heck!" A grunt soon followed the blonde's semi conscious statement to the amusement of his listener. "Ha ha, you know it was bloody fantastic, but then again, it was your first time…" Their eyes met for Jack to get a closer view of the flush that was apparent on his guest's face. "Right Ralph…?"

What was this? Ralph could hear his heart beat drumming in his ears, the breath escaping hastily. _Why is he staring at me? His eyes…_ The blue light seeped into Ralph's mind and down into his heart, bringing forth a sensational chill through his veins. "I see. Well, I'm glad I gave you something for now. Enjoy," Jack sighed, almost disappointed by Ralph's stoic stare. He peered towards the ticking clock that's face glimmered back at him with a dim light. A set of chiming tones hit the room as well as catching Ralph's attention. "I need to go!"

The neglected soup was jolted onto the nearest flat surface, the stumbling young man swishing every which way as did the broth. Jack lifted an eyebrow, tilting his head the same way Ralph's body serpentined. Such a rush! What was he after? "Come on. You're in no condition to act busy. Just sit down…" Ralph's back remained turned to Jack and none of his words could pass such a barrier. "Listen to me!" The injured Ralph flinched as Jack held his arms tightly, giving Ralph little freedom to move. "You CAN'T GO OUT! You are in no condition and Roger might…"

"What Jack?" Ralph asked, almost out of breath completely. "What about Roger?" "He…he might be around. He's always around…" Eye contact was cut and the light in Jack's eyes retreated to the floor, too ashamed to explain further. "Geez Jack. Come on, it can't be that bad, just lock the door. I'm not helpless anymore, okay? Today was just all wrong." _All wrong…everything?_

Finally, Ralph was able to squeeze into his shoes that squished and gurgled the remaining water that hid inside his soles. A few curses tickled the edge of his lips with bitter intent while he stomped the liquid out heavily. The loud ruckus carried Ralph all the way to the door, no part of his body turning back to his savior…until. "It's all wrong, right? You mean everything today was wrong, Ralph?"

For some reason unknown to Ralph, he fumbled his words in the air before answering. The question wasn't hard; he knew the correct answer, so why stutter? "Yeah…I mean, you know how I am. I've never been weak. Today just caught me off guard, and I will never let anything like this happen again." The blonde jumped a bit when he heard an odd gasp come from behind him. A cry maybe, a hiccup? "Jack?"

"You really don't want to be with me like today, d…do you?" The almost inaudible query came in bits of sadness, followed by a few more of the odd gasps. A warm sensation tensed the sides of Ralph's face unconsciously, bothering him to the extent of slapping them. "You've known me for a long time Jack. This shouldn't be so hard. You know I'm not…that kind of person. I was caught up and didn't know what I was doing…and I regret what happened…so…let's end it here. It's safer that way, for you, and for me."

Only the dying steam dancing above the soup made a move. The two remained with their backs to each other, hidden expressions on each face. Ralph shut his eyes, cradling regret within his lids, while Jack widened his eyes, letting wet crystals mold with his clothing. His lips tried to fold and form the word, go, but nothing could cease their quivering. It seemed Ralph was forming a similar word…go… "Goodbye."

The door slam seemed to repeat itself, hauntingly looming its unforgiving sound in Jack's ears. "Just another mistake," he whispered to himself, sitting on the mess of a bed behind him. The closest hand traced the rim of the soup bowl he'd picked out for Ralph. Lines of blue ran around the spherical shape, never beginning or ending. "His eyes are exactly the same…" His index finger sank daintily into the clouded soup, his hand cringing as cold heat seeped into his skin. "Is it worth it anymore? Living in this prison…"

His feet turned his body to let him roll completely onto the bed. His knees hid into the comfort of his breathless chest. A grimace revealed the chapped cracks blooming rosily on his bottom lip. "Roger and Ralph…What point is there for me to exist in the world of being used and being hated? Why didn't I die on that island? I deserved it more than anyone else…" Tears jelled together in one long ribbon of wet, crawling down to Jack's cheeks and neck. A few shivered breaths fled into the still air, breaking into the dense depression circling the room.

The red head stretched his arms on either side of him, his head rolling to one side to gaze out the window. The vision of the faraway church remained blurry, but its tolling bells were as clear as day. "Oh heavenly father, what have I done? Have I not prayed to you daily and spoke of your word? Did I not repent for the unfortunate sins I walked this earth with? I've tried and tried, prayed and prayed. What more do I need?" Each passing word began tightening Jack's already uneasy voice a bit more, yet he continued speaking.

"I want me life back. I want to be Jack Merridew…the one who can be with someone without being abused or rejected. The one who doesn't know what blood tastes like. The one who can play music and pray to god without needing redemption or release…Why can I not be him?" A pale hand clenched firmly around the fading gold cross hanging lazily near the groove made from Ralph's body. "Did I press him too hard? I forcefully took his purity right here…"

Letting go of the cross, Jack watched it roll as far as it could go, stopping as the leash of a chain yanked it backwards. "God, is this a sin? Loving such a child, a boy nonetheless? Taking away the purest virginity since Mary herself…Ralph…" His hand traced the shape left behind, so gentle…almost as though there was a sleeping body beside him. "Am I using you as Roger is using me? I brought you into such an unholy hell of pain and suffering. I almost got you killed, and now that Roger knows where you are…he won't stop. Why didn't I tell you this before I…"

"I can't believe I'm gonna be late!" A clumsy run shot into a desperate sprint as Ralph dodged faceless people on his way to the familiar place he'd spoken of previously. The endless England streets curved every which way under his feet, changing from pavement to grass to cobblestone and back again. Luckily, the rain had stopped and the sun was attempting to shine through again. Just ahead, a curving black gate began to shut. "NO!"

A stern looking man covering himself with a long leather trench coat turned his head slightly to see Ralph rushing full speed towards him. "A little late today, aren't we?" "PLEASE SIR! Just let me go in and see them for a little while! Please!" The determined look never left Ralph's watery eyes, and the man just smiled slyly. "You know the way out. Make sure you lock up when you finish, ya hear?" "Thanks!"

After stepping into the large stretch of land, Ralph took a few moments to catch his breath. "I'm here…thank god I made it…" The fog had eased up, and walking among graves became something Ralph was used to, so maneuvering through the cemetery was no problem. He knew the way all to well. "There you are…"

Drops of dew dove into Ralph's already damp pants as he knelt in the grass before two graves. His eyes scrolled downward, reading over the inscription that had already been memorized in his mind. He noticed a few new cracks in the stone markers, and a small ditch in between them where an animal seemed to have dug. A small pool of water, strangely clean and clear, had partially filled it. _It's peaceful again…_

"S…So. How have you two been?" Ralph listened to himself speak, shaking his head in disbelief. "Can't believe I'm still doing this trippy stuff. I just wish I could sit with you guys in person…wherever you are now, cuz I need your help. I think I screwed up somewhere. You'll never believe what happened to me today. I found Jack…just like I was kinda hoping I would before, you know?"

Peering around him, Ralph grew a bit more comfortable as he realized he was the only breathing being around. "He's changed, I mean, really changed. He's soft now…I mean…" Ralph blushed as he looked upon his fingertips that had pressed into such tender skin. "But he doesn't smile as much anymore. He's kind of like the kids back on the island…He clung to me a lot…But that's not too bad, right? He cared for me and he sings really well. He's even with a church now, just like me…I'm rambling though, aren't I? You probably don't need to hear all this, either of you."

Though he knew no response would come to him, Ralph sat on his knees quietly and stared in front of him. The silence, however, was unbearable, and his mouth opened a few moments later. "I…uh…almost saw Roger too. He's done some really psychotic stuff to Jack, and he wants me too. Jack told me all this stuff, and he seems to regret a lot. We talked for a really long time…and…he…we…I don't even know how to say it guys…"

Ralph seemed oblivious to the cries coming from his lips and how violently his body had begun shaking. Loose drips of rainwater scurried down the gravestones as if they were crying for his pain wordlessly. _It's alright Ralph…_ "We slept together…Oh god…the first time I have…and it was with him…and I liked it. I mean, I…I don't even know what to say. I liked feeling him hold me into him. He's so warm and familiar. I shouldn't feel like that…People always tell me being…a homo is wrong…so what am I doing?"

A sudden wind stung the side of Ralph's cheek, almost as if someone was disagreeing with him. "What are you guys thinking? I mean, that's what everyone tells me…but…" His heart thumped faster, its beat pumping into his entire body all at the same rhythm. "I wanna feel it again. That rush and all the heat. I wanna feel his hair again…and his chest. Everything… Something just seems…"

"Right…He must have gone right," Jack pondered to himself, buttoning the top of his heavy jacket as he paced outside of his building. His front teeth grinded nervously against his lips, aggravating the chapped cracks even further. "Where would he go around here? He doesn't even live in this section of the city," he sighed heavily. Keeping to himself, Jack continued his debate, not noticing he was being crept up on.

"Excuse me!" A bubbly voice called from behind, taking Jack by utter surprise. "OH! I…I'm sorry!" Turning around, Jack stood before a young girl with sandy blonde hair and eyes the color of Italian olives. She twirled a parasol of pink, her giggle lighting the grey sky. "I hope I didn't scare you! You just seemed a bit lonesome." The choir boy found it hard to explain himself to her cheerfulness. It would ruin it for her. "Are you looking for someone?" She asked with her head tilted, hoping to catch his gaze through the curtain of red.

"Yeah, but he ran off before I could…" "OH! That's okay! I bet I could help you! I'm looking for someone too, and he's always in the same place." Her splayed fingers flashed in front of his face while she waved them wildly. "I'll help you find your friend if you escort me to mine. I bet you're a gentleman, so it'll be fun!"

Denying the hyperactive girl before him would have been impossible. _Maybe she can help me…_ "A…Alright then." "YAY! Let's go!" Before Jack could protest, the young lady's arm looped around his and dragged him across the way. He watched her hair fly against the wind and the smile that grew on her face each time he stumbled. _She reminds me of someone…_ "You never told me your name. I bet it's really pretty," she suddenly chuckled while turning her head to him. "Ah…It's Jack…Jack Merridew…and you?" "My name is Angela Tasna."

"That's a very pretty name. Your last name does sound familiar as well…" "OH! It's not very common, but maybe you've heard of my father. He's very prestigious in his field of work!" Jack thought back for a moment, unable to think of quite the right person. "What work does he do?" "Oh…oh! It's not important!" She reassured with another fast wave of her arm. "Oh…Alright…"

"Is he who you're looking for out here?" He questioned suddenly, trying to find any information that he could. "Nope! I'm looking for a friend of mine. I haven't seen him in awhile, even though he promised he'd be around, you know? He's a flakey kid. Always running from me and such." This time, they both shared a laugh. "I know just the kind of person. I'm looking for someone just like that…even though he probably doesn't want me around."

Angela's eyes lost a pinch of their sparkle, her arm holding a little bit tighter. "Are you sad? Did you have a fight with your friend?" "Yeah…I suppose I did," he replied slowly as if he wasn't sure of it himself. "Well, I bet your friend will be happy that you came after him. You seem really worried, and that'll make him feel better!" She exclaimed cheerfully. They took another few turns, leading them towards a heavy looking gate. "How do you know that?" "Hee, I just do!" As they continued along the path leading up to the plains of the dead, Angela seemed to pick up her pace just a bit. "Why are we going this way? It's a cemetery!" "Don't worry! I…"

"Know. I know…I'd better get back to my life. I'm sorry I bothered you guys with all of this." The tired blonde rose to his feet slowly, shaking out his numb legs and regaining his balance. "Simon…Piggy. You know I miss you guys and I'm really sorry I couldn't…prevent anything that happened when you were still alive. I just hope you can forgive me for that…"

Without another word, Ralph departed towards the entrance. Everything he'd known seemed to remain in the decay of the cemetery. All his feelings stayed with the two graves of his once true friends. He felt himself sinking deeper into his own self depressive quicksand, agony tearing at his feet. "What's the point of going on like this? Geez…" He slammed the gates shut rougher than usual, struggling to push the key into the lock. His hands trembled as they always did when he left that grim place. "I ca…" "RALPH!"

Whirling around to the melodious voice, Ralph's eyes widened. In seconds, the shadow of a pink parasol revealed a doll like beauty, and he was hugged tightly. "Angela!" He gasped, holding on to her as they teetered back and forth. He stiffened silently as the sight of an out of breath Jack found him. "J…" "I knew I would find you here! I thought you would wait for me silly!" Angela scolded, giving Ralph no time to explain before a kiss came his way.

Once she'd had enough, the giggly girl held Ralph's hand, catching her breath. "I'm sorry! I forgot! Ralph, this is my friend Jack Merridew! He helped me find you!" Ralph could see Jack's hands shaking beneath the folds of his coat, his throat constantly swallowing. "And this Jack, is my boyfriend Ralph Kenrich!" Jack could see the pink growing on Ralph cheeks, but he never let her hand go. The graveyard behind them couldn't have echoed the words anymore. _Girlfriend._

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Author's Note: I'm really sorry I haven't updated in a long time, but school has been keeping me away horribly. Yeah, so this has much more dialogue in it, but I hoped you enjoy it. OH! And see if you can figure out what's goin on with Angela's last name! XP I'm so lame! Anyway, I really hope you liked this chapter, because this is probably the best one I've done so far, in my opinion at least. And I have a lot of ideas going around, and if there is anything you'd like to see or find out, please IM or e-mail me with your suggestions. I'd love some feedback on what would make this story even better!

THANK YOU FOR READING THUS FAR!


	8. Chapter Seven

Author's Note: THANK YOU SO MUCH! I don't think any of you realize how much your comments have changed my week. I've been having a serious stress issue lately, and school is slaughter (luckily, I'm on break). Let's pray this means updates. If things work out well enough over winter break, I may be able to update every few days! How does that sound to you guys? Yay! Or Nay? And plus, all of you Jack fans are gonna hate me for this! I'm tearing at his heart's strings even more in this one. Ah, Roger sure does make things wonderful! OH! And flashbacks are _italicized like so._

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**Chapter Seven**

The clouds in the rather dim sky cracked into veins of light. A puddled England street glimmered from the heavenly gift, though one spot in particular kept a bleak setting. Three figures stood in awkward silence as eyes glanced in several directions. One cleared his throat out of the sake of embarrassment, another retreating his hands within the confines of his sleeves, making sure they hid their shaking. Only one had the audacity to speak up amidst the strange silence.

"Hello? Ralph? Jack?" Angela swayed back and forth between the two, trying to catch a glimmer of expression on either face. To her frustration, each time she could sneak a look, the other pair of eyes would turn. "What's going on? What aren't you telling me?!" She demanded in a whinier tone with a childish glare. She rushed back to her silent boyfriend and hung herself around his neck. Ralph clenched his teeth together as if to keep words from spilling out. He turned his head down just a bit to get a better view of his own neck.

There it lay, a lovebite the size of a quarter. The shades of red and deep purple blended together with another lover's pride and affection. Just as it seemed Angela was close to noticing it, Ralph quickly whipped a hand to shield it. "R…RALPH! What was that?!" She hollered, clinging to his fingers. "Wh…What are you talking about…?" His hesitant manner of speaking only caused her hands to clench tighter around his, their knuckles both turning a ghostly white.

All the while, a speechless choir boy knew not what to say. All he could do was take in everything through the sky of his eyes. He was powerless in this situation. He didn't matter anymore. "Oh my god Ralph, is this some kind of hickey?! What were you doing while I was out looking for you?!" The delicate girl who stood between them seemed to melt away with an envious rage at the thought of what he could have POSSIBLY been doing. "I…uh…" Ralph looked at Jack, tearing himself apart with the truth and what sounded right. To his surprise, the red head braved a smile, shrugging his shoulders coolly. Almost as though he was saying he himself didn't care.

"It's…just a bruise. I slipped in the church and hit my neck…on a bench…" Clearly, a lame excuse, and nothing could have sounded stupider…_She can't really…_"Why didn't you say so Ralph? You scared me!" Angela worriedly wrapped her arm around Ralph's again and pulled him in the other direction. "I hope you find your friend Jack! I'm sorry I have to go so soon!" She called behind her shoulder, too preoccupied with Ralph's 'injury' to further acknowledge the confounded Jack. He stood with his mouth slightly open, watching Ralph disappear from his sights again. For some strange reason, it felt like it would be the last time they would ever meet…

"Goodbye," he whispered softly and lifted his hand as if to wave the air around him away. A few times, he did spin around his wrist in hopes of clearing the clouded vision around his eyes. No matter how many times Jack whisked his hand this way or that way, a murky miasma enveloped his eyes. "Crying again…?" His shameful eyes burned of salty water even though he fought them. The shivers of his hands never stopped and now protruded from his coat sleeves to comfort his contracting stomach. Some higher power seemed to be dealing out blows in any open spot Jack had. Nausea swept over him at every angle until he gave way to the ground. _I can't stand this anymore…_

Water droplets hung along the window pane of a decaying factory. They gingerly crawled down the glass to listen to the single voice speaking in the dusty workshop. Inside, Roger lay on a conveniently placed water bed with his long legs stretching towards the hanging lights. He chuckled as he listened to a muffled voice speak to him on the phone. His toes flexed up and down repeatedly in sheer happiness over what he was being told. "You really came through for me this time. I guess I owe you a lot now, don't I?"

A finger twirled itself around a messy curl, quickly unwrapping itself. Each time, it sprung up back into the vines of his jungle like hair. His lips grew wider in a grin, pushing back the springs of black against his face. "Yes, I know what I'm doing. I'm really good at it, too. Better than you even, so don't worry. You just focus on taking care of that idiot until I have time to, okay? Thanks. Bye!" Bursting with a new vigor, Roger slammed down the phone and jumped into the air. "I can't believe this! I'm so excited! I get to act! I've always wanted to!"

His tanned feet ground themselves into the quilted blanket below him. A small shriek came from his mouth, and he seemed unlike himself. Letting himself fall back, Roger grabbed hold of a stuffed animal that had been carefully placed on the headboard of the bed. He then sat it before him and critically pulled on the sides of its bow to make them even. While he did this odd chore, he spoke a few words to his 'companion'. "Josef, I get to act again! Jack shouldn't disobey me and now he's gonna get punished!" The head of the lifeless animal flopped backwards in the direction of a rusted pair of chains attached to the ends of the bed.

Roger rolled his dark eyes behind the shade of his bangs and curled into a ball around his friend. "What are you talking about Josef? Sex doesn't help anyone in a time like this!" A silence grew after that and the two eyes stared at each other as if they spoke in a way no one understood. The other moving person in the room was almost able to sneak past Roger's radar, but the squeak of wet shoes perked the sadist's ears and he immediately shot up. "YOU'RE BACK!"

Jack pressed himself into a concrete wall in shock, catching the toy that flew at him. "Roger! Did I wake you…?" He winced hesitantly as the cool support crept up his back. Roger remained silent for a moment, rising to his hands and knees. While he wobbled against the waves of the bed, dots began forming against his skin. These goose bumps coaxed a few child like sounds from Roger's throat, tears coming to his eyes. "Jack," whimpered the newly frightened image, much to the choir boy's anxiousness. His knees lost strength and crashed into the ground. _What's wrong with him? This isn't…right._

"Jack I had that dream again…and you weren't there when I woke up so I thought you…you…" The tanned boy quivered before looking directly at Jack. "You left me again! Like before!" _Before…_ Jack was already on his feet before he knew what he was doing. Chains around his heart seemed to be drawing him nearer to the parallel version of Roger who had started screaming at the top of his lungs. Rather than his usual monstrous howls that shattered bravery, they only brought shards of ache into the hearts of those forced to listen.

Kneeling unsteadily on the jiggling mattress, the stunned red head could only try to calm Roger down. Each time he started to speak, another disheartened sob interrupted him. It seemed nothing could be helped. Roger was turning out to be like…_Ralph…N…No I can't let this happen anymore!_ "R…Roger! Please!" Jack cried as he turned over the limp being into his arms. The curls in the front of his face fell sideways, opening Roger's eyes in full view. The black orbs glistened against the hung lighting in a way that made them look like two hidden pearls deep beneath a murky sand. "Please stop crying…"

"I can't! You were gone and my chest…" Roger breathed, sitting up a little so his arms could fly around the sides of Jack's neck. "My chest started hurting again. Remember why?" Roger's fingers trickled leisurely until they'd met with Jack's. "Roger w…" "It hurts still," he groaned, threading their hands together. A heat began radiating into Jack's freckles, darkening his face against his weak protesting. The power he had over Roger never existed, and in no time, his hands were between the thin fabric of Roger's shirt and his bare chest. His hands jumped slightly as they ran over a course patch of skin above the heart. "It's still there. You remember, don't you?"

"_Boys, please calm down. We're only here to help you. Just come with us, and you'll be alright," stated the apprehensive soldier as he watched the tears flow from every savage in sight. Only one remained dry. "NO! Don't defend that traitor! Let me kill him now! NOW!" The attention turned to Roger whose spear was raised high into the air, his eyes reflecting the flame that had caught a nearby tree. "GIVE HIM TO ME NOW!" On the other side of the chaos, Ralph nestled his own arms together, gasping for air. "STOP IT!"_

_As if overtaken by the very beast they slaughtered, the suntanned warriors charged towards a dazed Ralph. "STOP RIGHT THERE!" Ordered an armed soldier, his gloved hand doing little to sway the attackers. Jack, who had hung back, shielded his face from the burning sun that cast a shadow over those who he had been controlling this whole time. Shaking himself out of his stupor, he looked upon the footprints taking up the sand and saw a strange gleam from the head soldier's hand. "ROGER! ROG…"_

_The smell of gunpowder drew out a ribbon of blood that dyed the white sands of the beach. A hole exploded into the ground behind Roger and he froze. The other children screamed in terror, rushing in the opposite direction. Ralph clung to the officer he'd been with for the time being and grew weaker with each passing moment. Jack could feel a single drop of sweat pass down his sunburned cheek in slow motion. Roger seemed surrounded in a circle of embers raining down from God's holy hand. His hand held tightly over his heart in an attempt to stop the rush of ruby from leaving his thin body. The wind tipped him sideways and he was forced to view the other boys being rounded up like the boars they hunted. They were scared and wild, and no one understood what was going on. Were they going to leave him?_

"_ROGER!" The same desperate voice that screamed for him before was now beside him. Jack's callused hands pressed against Roger's until the blood slowed its travel. "You have to hang on a bit longer! COME ON ROGER!" The choir boy continued to beg over the buzzing that had begun in Roger's ears. His coal black eyes began to roll in all directions, towards the flames, the fear, the friend... _

"_HEY YOU! GET OVER HERE!" Roger saw Jack snap his head as a barrage of suited men rushed towards him. "GET AWAY FROM HIM!" Jack bellowed gruffly, lowering to the ground as a predator does when it pounces. Roger's blood seeped from between his fingers into the sand, disappearing like nothing was never there. "J…Jack…" The ruffian was forced to watch a soldier take Jack down with a swift kick to his ribcage, landing him on top of Roger as though he would have protected him anyway. The last thing seen was a small trail of blood fall from Jack's lips as he gave a weak smile to his collaborator. "It's okay Roger…I got you…" The blood seemed to mix into the pool forming around Roger's exposed wound all on its own, but the two couldn't grip their consciousness long enough to find out… "Goodbye island…" _

"Goodbye island," Roger whispered in a voice that showed how clearly unstable he was. "Jack is gonna forget you. Jack's gonna forget EVERYTHING!" His small frame slithered back into a ball in Jack's lap, his face digging into the wet fabric of Jack's coat. "I won't…I won't forget anything. Why would you think that…?" Jack asked even though he wished he hadn't. His breath escaped in a huff as Roger dug his fist into the already weak stomach Jack was trying to cover. "I KNOW WHAT YOU DID! I KNOW WHAT YOU DID WITH RALPH!"

The room grew quiet after Roger's short rant ended. A series of cries returned the sound once again and Roger shot Jack a hard stare. "FINE! Fine," he suddenly mumbled, shutting his eyes to gather up his strength. "You have a choice. You can go after Ralph like I think you want to…or you can still stay and help me. I won't make you stay and I won't beg you anymore…I just want to see you happy…" He ended his short speech with a kiss on each of Jack's knuckles. That was all.

Jack sat for a moment, his eyes unfocusing the longer he thought. Roger was making promises, but was this really Roger? Could the helpless creature clinging to him really be the one who'd chained him to the very bed he kneeled upon? Jack rubbed the throbbing bite that blemished his otherwise colorless shoulder. "I…" The last words Ralph stoically claimed earlier repeated relentlessly in the back of Jack's unsure mind.

"_You've known me for a long time Jack. This shouldn't be so hard. You know I'm not…that kind of person. I was caught up and didn't know what I was doing…and I regret what happened…so…let's end it here. It's safer that way, for you, and for me."_

He pressed his cross against his lips and took one last deep breath. _God please guide me towards the right decision. I must forget what pain and misfortune has occurred. Please help me to move on…_

"I made promises too Roger and I said I would help you," he began while tucking the stuffed animal Roger had thrown between his hands. "I shouldn't have betrayed you like I did today. I'm sorry…I'm not going to leave you as long as you need me." Roger contently snuggled into Jack's embrace, the shiver leaving his body instantly. "That makes me happy Jack…so VERY very happy…" As Roger pressed closer into Jack's hold, a carnivorous smile crossed his face and a bloodthirsty look flashed in his eyes. _Thank you so very much…_

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Author's Note: Yes, Roger is quite an actor. UGH! This chapter was really hard for me for some reason. I just haven't written well in a very long time. Anyway, Roger is probably my favorite character to work on in this because of how evil he can be. He's really childish though, since he keeps a stuffed animal (picture Kon from Bleach!). I named it Josef after Josef Stalin. I have a feeling Roger would love those types of people, so I went there. I have a whole story about the name, but I don't wanna waste time telling it! Anywho, I hope you semi liked the chapter and ideas and thoughts are appreciated! I'm contemplating revealing more about what happened between Jack and Roger on the boat to London (after Roger was shot), but I'm not sure. If you do comment, please tell me if you'd like to see this! It would help my decision a lot!

THANK YOU!


	9. Chapter Eight

Author's Note: Wow. I feel really touched. This story is getting pretty far, and I honestly couldn't have done it without all of your support. Your criticism and encouragement are really helping me grow and because of all of you, I've pushed myself to be a better writer. I pray I've been able to give you something good to read. Now originally, I was going to write a chapter revolving around just Ralph and Angela, but I want that to come later. Now this may seem icky, but I'm going to split this chapter up into four parts. Four for each of the focused on characters. It's easier to read and write that way, so this first one is around Jack. One more thing! We will be meeting another new character with a very interesting way of reading people…And once again, _flashbacks are in italics like so._ Enjoy cuz this is a long one!

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**Chapter Eight**

A single beaming face pressed itself against the fogging glass of a quaint flower shop. The sky finally ended its heavy downpour and the flowers would soon get their much needed sunshine. "This is wonderful. The flowers won't have to drown. I was a bit worried," spoke the sole shop owner who now stood at the doorway. Nearby, the dewdrops left on the leaf of a dropping flower dropped into a puddle beneath it. "Oh, I'm glad you're alright too. I thought you of all the flowers would have drowned," laughed the smiling face to the golden flower below him.

"Hurry up Jack! You're slowing me down!" Puddles everywhere were exploding as boots kicked into them, the toe dragging ever so slightly into the gravel. Roger pranced around gaily with Jack lagging behind. "Roger must you do that?" Jack moaned while dodging the ripple of water flying at his face. His eyes rolled as a tongue stuck out at him. "You're so dumb Jack! Let me have fun! After all, YOU left me alone all day, remember?" Roger slid to a stop and threw himself on Jack who resisted pushing him off. "But don't be guilty. I mean, you had your reasons, right?" Pried the deeper voice with the same grinning face it always appeared with. Roger seemed to keep his eyes level with Jack despite their height difference. The eyes that appeared behind the black curtain showed more than human's gaze. _He's such a…_ "OH!"

The leather of Roger's jacket snapped Jack's arm as his eyes followed a couple strolling past them. "What a pretty pretty girl." A look passed in Roger's eyes that only came in his weakest moments. They were soft, almost proud of what he saw before him. "I'll be right back…" Before his booted feet could drift through anymore pools of dirty water, Jack gripped the back of Roger's collar, flinging him backwards. As a tiny yelp of surprise escaped his lips, Roger began struggling against the hand that held him. "What are you doing?! You aren't my mom! I can wander!" "Yeah but…not them…because…"

The same devilish eyes were clawing into Jack's skull and forcing words to gag on his tongue. "Because what?" "Be…because…I…they…" Roger overpowering glares sucked words into the clearing sky and they were gone in thin air. The same as always. Domination, in a shorter, skinnier version. "Wow, I guess Jesus has your tongue, huh?" Roger mocked, bobbling his chin up and down the same way Jack had been while he babbled. "I'm off!"

The impish boy had already turned a few corners before Jack was conscious enough to notice his lack of presence. "ROGER!" His panicked heart beat harshly against his chest in a feeble attempt to speed up his feet. Everywhere he seemed to be, Roger wasn't. _Does he have any idea he went after Ralph and his g…girlfriend?!_ Tailing his associate was pointless and Jack just traced his steps and held his arms close to keep warm. "Why…?"

"Excuse me, but you seem to be either lost or just confused. Come in please!" The choir boy turned to find a tall blonde with a pleasant smile stretched across his face. The blue in his eyes had a mysterious look of wisdom, yet held the glimmer of fish scales. "Simon!" Jack suddenly found himself spurting out. The little blood in the man's face ran down to his feet and he took a step closer. "Did you say…Simon?" Jack's hand was already over his mouth and his feet began reversing their previous movement. That name itself was so simple. Simon.

"Please wait!" The hand that snatched Jack's wrist was tight and warm with dirt. He shivered at the thought of what these hands were capable of. His tender looks caused the man to back off a little, regaining his composure and his smile. "I'm really sorry about that. You just said Simon and I…" Jack nodded, questioning him to make sure. "Are you related to Simon? The Simon who died five years ago." "Heh. Five years ago. Such a long time…"

The red head sat on an old stool propped beside a counter holding potted flowers. He scratched his head and took in the jungle like sights around him. _Why am I here? Roger will be looking for me soon and if it's anything like last time…_His head bumped repeatedly against the smooth surface to shatter the remaining thoughts of Roger. Jack didn't even have a clue why he followed the man inside the flower shop. Maybe it was the overpowering calm that seemed to beckon him into a safe world. Or, it could have been the sight of the forest within the eyes of the smiler. Simon was with Jack the last hours of his life. His body became home to Jack's spear, as well as the burn of his fear and rage.

Honey and earl grey mixed together in the air and hinted of the man's nearness. The aroma sent Jack straight and he eagerly accepted the offered cup. The blonde man busied himself by laying out two plates and cutting thick slices of bread for them both. "I hope you're fine with bread and butter. I haven't bought any more groceries," chuckled the man with a shrug before adding, "But I do have some summer sausage if that's alright." The plate of browned meat sat before Jack and his stomach turned corkscrews. "I…I don't eat meat. I'm sorry." "Ah. Vegetarian I see. Compassion for animals?"

Jack's teeth grinded against each other and he dug his hands over his stomach. The taste of greasy fat and dripping blood from long ago popped into his taste buds and nearly took Jack's sanity. "Sort of. I've seen some pretty horrible things done to animals," he managed to cough up a quick reply before resting his head on the table again until the plate disappeared. The tea was gushed down his throat as quickly as drunkards take whiskey. The shopkeeper gave an apologetic grin and poured another cup of tea in an attempt to redeem himself.

The now interested man rested his elbow on the counter and watched as Jack silently prayed over his meal, breaking the bread in half before taking a polite bite. His eyes caught the short twinkle of something beneath the young man's sweater. A gold chain hid itself and complimented the milky skin it was wrapped around. "What's that you've got there under your sweater? It looks very beautiful." After swallowing another mouthful of bread, Jack revealed the cross that swung back and forth around his thumb. "My, you're a very dedicated worshipper, aren't you?"

"It's that obvious?" Jack gasped, for no stranger had ever brought up the matter to him. When he gave a sheepish expression and scratched his freckled cheek, the owner burst into a fit of giggles. Jack sat and listened to the sound coming from the man across from him. It was like that of a child, fast and frequent. It was an innocent laugh with no sign of ridicule in it. Once the man put a hand over his mouth and shut his eyes, the gestures' past owner became clear again.

Lowering his eyes, Jack tried his hardest to block out the similarities between the dead boy and his relative. It was so sickingly sweet he couldn't bare it. Luckily, the laughter died down and a grave face built against the bright bangs hanging on the man's face. "You're troubled, aren't you? Did I say something wrong?" Blinking a few times, Jack shook his head gradually but never took his eyes off the man. "By the way, can you tell me a bit about this place? I'm curious."

The jovial face that greeted Jack earlier had returned and the man plopped himself down opposite his young acquaintance and cleared his throat. "Well, a long time ago, my family won a lot of money during a trial and I decided to use my share to build the dream shop my brother and I had always wanted. You probably couldn't see the sign since it's covered in moss, but its called The Lord of the Fl…" One of the people sitting in the room flinched. The voice speaking to it was a dull buzzing and an unknown speaker became present.

_You still remember me Jack. I drove you crazy. You killed me so I drove you crazy. That's right; you're going to be mad. Your life will be ruined and it's all because you killed…SIMON! Simon is dead and I loved Simon. Jack took Simon and ruined everything. Jack is disgusting! Jack sinned and Jack makes everyone miserable. The flowers all turn to graves because of Jack. Jack took Simon. Jack to Simon from Sage. ALL JACK'S FAULT!_

"Sage…?" The man cocked his head, replying, "Yes? How did you know my name?" Jack was still partially in the confines of his own mind and didn't even know the answer himself. It bothered him, just as much as the idea of having this man be related to Simon. He was just as generous and their care for flowers was very important. To think…Jack ruined this compassionate man's life through his own mistake. _He probably doesn't recognize me, but I know for a fact…he was in the second row at the courthouse during my trial…_"You have quite some sadness in your eyes. It makes them bluer…Something IS the matter," observed Sage slowly.

Jack waved his hands clumsily in front of him and hurriedly reassured him he was wrong. "I just get caught up in my thoughts. That's all. That's all it ever is…" Sage sighed loudly, shaking his head and giving another light laugh. "You're a mystery, aren't you? But that's all you ever are, right?" He watched as Jack's cheeks showed his shame with their color, staring at his features for a moment. "How about I show you something? Would you come with me please?" Jack's answer was given to the man's back, since he knew what the answer would be despite the nervousness.

Catching up to Sage, Jack kept close as they traveled down a long hallway. The walls were covered in paintings of exquisite flowers of every shape, size, and color imaginable. Also, a few pictures where there as well. One caught Jack's eye and he halted immediately. In the photograph was young Simon. He was sitting amongst a garden of five pedaled flowers. There were ones with the same light yellow color as Simon's own hair, a few had the same pastel blue he found when gazing into Ralph's wide eyes. He even found the deep fuchsia that Roger had on one of his favorite necklaces. Even though the surrounding flowers were breathtaking, the tiny one within Simon's cupped hands was most noticeable. "A daisy," Jack recognized, lifting his fingers to touch the glass protecting the image.

"That's right. I see you know a bit about flowers yourself." Sage had noticed where Jack stopped and joined him. He put his hands together, pressing them against his lips as though he could not speak. Jack peered out of the corner of his eyes to see the look of pure elation on Sage's face. "Simon was always so content among flowers. I could always find him in these. They're primroses." _Simon was like that until the end…_ "You…You must miss him." Jack was gently nudged forward into a bright light, Sage's voice behind. "I do, but he's still here. Right here."

The sun had finally broken the sky's grey cover completely, blowing rays of light into every square of glass that surrounded the two entering the room. "Such a wonderful greenhouse," Jack whispered dreamily, his hand touching the velvety petal of a flower hanging on a vine. "I knew you'd like it and that's why I wanted you here. Do you think you could help me?" Sage held out a wicker basket that looked woven with angel hair. A few pieces stuck out here and there, but it looked professional. "What do you want me to do?"

A smooth hand pressed lightly on Jack's shoulder to signal him to follow to his knees. "All I want you to do laddie, is help me choose a bouquet. Sound alright to ya?" The red head willfully nodded, furrowing his brow at the difference in his acquaintance's voice. Sage caught it himself, putting his hand over his mouth again. "You're Irish? But Simon's your brother, right?" Rubbing a long nail along the coloring on his cream skin, Sage explained himself. "I ran away for a bit, to Ireland. Simon's death wasn't easy for me. Can't say I wanted to come back here, but for some reason, I couldn't stay away. You're probably too young to understand what I'm saying though," sighed the blonde as he ruffled Jack's waving locks.

Before any further questions could be asked about the subject, Sage was crawling in between two bushes, squeezing past two shaking tiger lilies. "Hurry up la…Jack!"

Jack tried to make his way through the tangle of olive leaves, his eyes squinting against the breaks of sunshine that peeped in through the holes. Every move he made, a new flower would welcome him with a kiss on the cheek and a sweet smell. Eventually, he caught up to the ecstatic owner who knelt in the middle of several patches of flowers. "All I want you to do is pick three. I promise I'll be back in a minute. I need to water some flowers over there. Alright?"

Once again, the cheerful shopkeeper jumped into an assumption and disappeared with a watering can in his hand. "I don't even know how to do this…" Jack's hand moved back and forth in search of the perfect flower, but deciding wasn't easy. The colors burst out in ever direction, the shapes becoming endless patterns of god's handiwork. To his right, a white and red flowers stretched towards him, its long petals waving as it bobbed around its stem. Leaning closer, a voice echoed within it. "S…Simon?" _But…_

_A thin figure sat on a flattened rock overlooking the beach. The breeze swept his golden locks against his eyes, the bunch of flowers gathered in his arms tickling his bare skin. A shadow suddenly cast over him and an impatient voice called to him. "Simon, where were you while we were hunting? Have you been sitting here all day?" Simon turned towards the voice, finding Jack with a monstrous expression on his tan face. He squinted as the sun shone around the powerful hunter's outline. "I didn't want to see any more dead animals," Simon admitted openly, pressing his chin into his discoveries._

"_What in bloody hell are you going on about now? We have work to do! Where were you?" Simon's lips had disappeared within the flowers, showing Jack silently he refused to answer. The question was repeated, yet each time, more of Simon's face seemed to melt with the silky plants. Drips of crimson ferocity escaped from Jack's fist onto the ground, spreading out in bloody pools. "LOOK AT ME!" The wrath of his oppressor came in the form of a fist, scattering the flowers and knocking the silent Simon to his back._

_A flash of remorse rammed into Jack's heart when Simon flipped himself over, peering out into the tropical sky to see the cascade of petals and stems fall away into darkness. "T…That's what you get! Now let's go!" The savage was quick to turn his back, scrambling down the rock. Midway down, he saw Simon rise, almost as if he was in the sky himself. "To Jesus." _

"_What?" Unusually willing to hear Simon's nonsense, Jack hopped back onto the rock, standing beside the smiling boy. "You destroyed the flowers, but now the wind must have taken them back to Jesus. That's all…" With that, Simon turned to Jack with a sunny smile on his face, one that had been hidden since they had been brought to the island. "HEY! Wait! What are you trying to say Simon?!" "Never mind Jack."_

The knots in his stomach tightened again and pulled Jack out of his semi consciousness. "I'm going crazy…that wasn't…" He opened his eyes, gasping as he was face to face with flowers that exploded right into him with a blush the same color as his own. Once again, a ghostly murmur spoke words Jack could hardly make out. "The what…?" Now, Jack felt alone for the first time since entering. The glass walls reflected his sudden fright despite the sun's many arms reaching through the roof for him. "Sage?" Sage had to be the only option; no other living creature was present when they entered.

Jack pulled up one side of his sweatshirt as a drop of dew fell upon the exposed shoulder. The sudden pop of the orb of water heightened the anxiousness in Jack's body. His hands lay flat against the grass and he prepared to spring at any moment, it was an old instinct…an old habit. "This is crazy," he scolded himself, his ring finger tapping the bridge of his nose. His other hand loosened the tense grip it had on his sweatshirt, letting it slide back to the edges of his shoulder. Just as soon as he did, tiny bell shaped flowers dipped against him, kissing the curves of his wound gently. The flowers that rubbed into him so, they all reminded him of someone. _The flowers!_ The final call of the eerie spirit that hid itself…_Who is it?_

"_Jack, are you okay?" The nineteen year old's eyes fluttered open to Ralph, who was wrapped up in the blankets of Jack's bed. "I'm fine," he replied quietly, brushing the loose strands of hair hanging around his face aside. Ralph watched shyly, keeping a short distance so his naked flesh would no longer touch Jack's as it had a few moments ago. "Why are you hiding your face like that? You look like the Virgin Mary the way you wear that blanket." The very uncomfortable Ralph dodged and rolled from every movement of Jack's hand as it tried to remove the cover on the blonde hair. "Ralph! Why are you acting so afraid? You know I'm not…"_

"_I'm not afraid of you, okay?! I'm not, but aren't you confused or worried?! We just…we just…" "We made love. What's wrong with that?" Jack lifted himself up halfway, stretching his body over to the other side of the bed where Ralph tried to cover himself. "But I don't love you Jack! You don't love me either! We haven't seen each other in five years, and then all of a sudden, I'm in your bed!" Ralph's entire body curled up closer together as Jack laid his arm on the cool pillow his partner's head rested on. "I can explain it simply like this…"_

_His backing up brought Ralph to a teeter on the bed's edge, and the fall would be painful. It was the ground or Jack. "Uh…" "There are a lot of things I've never had the chance to tell you and I might not ever get the chance to tell you..." An ivory arm swooped around Ralph's lean hip, pulling him into an inescapable embrace. "But I don't think it's impossible for me not to love you now despite what you're telling me. Every time you push me away, I'm just going to keep holding you tighter. I hope you understand that."_

_Jack was pleased to see a calmer expression on Ralph's face, and even though the young boy kept his arms in between the two, he didn't pull away. "W…Well!" Shot back Ralph after forcing himself not to fall to Jack's charms, "I can't say it…now…I mean. I won't say it ever…or…" Accidentally, Ralph looked towards the eyes that intently watched him. They knew everything…"Yes Ralph? Or what?" "Or…!" Ralph attempted to pull himself away, but the chains of their necklaces had tangled and as soon as he pulled, Jack went right after him._

_The blonde covered his eyes with his arms as he hung half off the bed, his entire body covered by Jack's warm press. The cool chain rubbed slightly over Ralph's exposed nipple, and his blush was more evident now than ever. His position forced him to stare into those eyes…the angelic eyes that knew everything he thought. Before he could excuse himself, a hand was behind his head, pulling him into the shoulder he'd been holding onto. "I'm very glad Ralph that I can protect you for now since I know you're going soon. I hope that's okay with you."_

_Ralph's eyes followed a single spot of blood that had come from the 'lovebite' Roger left behind. Jack got it for defending Ralph instead of himself. The pale and thin choir boy went against the puppet master for Ralph's sake. All he wanted was…Ralph. "I…" His lips just barely touched the bloody skin, the drops painting them a deep and painful red. The words he spoke as kisses healed the painful wound were only loud enough for just him to hear. "What…?" Jack questioned, getting no answer for the one who spoke was too unsure of the words himself to repeat it. "Never mind Jack…"_

"Simon…and Ralph…" Before Jack could put his hand to his eyes, they'd already been overcome by a rush of tears. Just thinking of them was devastating, but nothing else could be done. They were not his. Simon was with God…Ralph was with his girlfriend. The friend was murdered. The love was unrequited. "I deserve this punishment. I deserve all the pain and suffering because of what I did to them," Jack sobbed through clenched teeth. _It's just like Roger said. _"It's sad you think of yourself that way, because I certainly don't."

Jack, startled, looked up to see Sage watching over him with the same look he had earlier. "I should have told you this before, but it seems people have strange thoughts in here. Nostalgic ones usually, and I can see from your eyes that you've had the same experience." The ashamed Jack took his eyes away hurriedly, trying to finish his tears. "Well, I also see you did not pick any flowers. I suppose I'll have to help you then," Sage grinned.

After dusting off the soot that had gathered on his pants already, the smiling blonde rested beside Jack. "Did you at least find anything you thought interesting?" Thinking back to his time alone, Jack remembered the three flowers that he ran into. "Those ones…" He pointed them out one by one, watching the shopkeeper take a pair of clippers out of his pocket. "You have quite good eyes. This first one is called an Amaryllis."

Jack watched quietly as Sage swiftly cut a handful, placing them in the basket as he spoke. "You parents must have been very proud of you as a child. You were very handsome and intelligent, yeah? Always the best student, the best son. You had a perfect childhood." The oddly accurate speech confounded Jack. "How did you…?"

"Oh! And the second one you picked is the peach blossom, a very rare flower around these parts. You must have had traumatizing experiences some time ago. It seems now you are in someone else's debt. You have become a captive of your own past. Someone has control over you…Someone has tamed and broken you to a point where you aren't even yourself anymore." A pulse in Jack's heart felt sharp. "Wh…" Once again, he watched the flowers cut and placed in the basket facing him.

"The last one you've chosen is one of my favorites. The Lily of the Valley. It seems you have found a new happiness, a love possibly. Whoever he or she is, I'd say they're bringing you a glimmer of hope. You do question it, and it isn't easy, but I see things working out for you." The last flowers were placed carefully inside the basket and Sage was already making his way back. "Hurry up now. I still have a gift for you."

The choir boy was alone again, his words jumbled in every which way. "He knew everything…" As he began crawling back, Jack kept his head low and thought to himself. _Could this man be dangerous? He must remember me if he knew of my past. If he's like Roger…will he torment me with Simon's memory? I'm completely defenseless now…_Emerging from the lush greens, Jack rushed to the hallway. "You're in quite some hurry to figure me out aren't you?"

Once Jack was on the other side of the counter, Sage looked him directly in the eye. "I will not lie to you. All I am is Simon's brother and nothing more. You seem afraid of me, but I can assure you, I will never hurt a stranger." _Stranger. So he doesn't recognize me after all…_" Then how did you know those…parts of my life. Even what hasn't completely happened yet?" Jack questioned everything, his suspicions higher than ever. "A simple guess from your mumbling back in the garden," Sage replied calmly, moving some loose hair behind his ear. The mistrust seemed silly now. Jack knew he wasn't exactly a closed book. Anyone who knew him could guess what he was thinking, and this man could be no different. "I'm sorry…"

The man laughed it off as if it were nothing, taking out some tissue paper. "Think nothing of it. You were just curious. People tell me I'm strange all the time, so I'm used to questions." Jack, still embarrassed by his behavior remained soundless and kept his eyes down at the flowers being wrapped up. Each one cuddled into another, complimenting one color to the next. It was strange to think Jack was able to even find such flowers on his own. His life was grey and everything seemed missing. "I suppose I should reward you. Here you go," offered Sage, pushing the bouquet towards Jack's hands.

Trying to act courteous, and also to be polite to the one he suspected, Jack took the flowers and thanked him in a low voice. Sage excused himself for a moment, leaving Jack alone. He turned on the stool so he was facing the windows. The streets were filling again and it looked as though everyone in the city was excited for the overdue sunshine. "Still no sign of Roger either…he must not be looking for me yet." Jack relaxed himself, breathing in a calm manor. Shutting his eyes, his head rested against the counter. _I'm still free for a bit. _

A jingling sound disturbed the quiet and something clamped down on the top of his ear. The sound of his surprise caused another chuckle from the returning shopkeeper. "Don't worry. No needles, it's a clamp earring." Removing it to get a better look, Jack held it up towards the light. The small clamp was colored a dark purple, silver chains dangling from its bottom. "What's this flower on the chain called?" Jack inquired. "I'm glad you're getting so into this now. It's a lilac. On this earring, it's a replica of a branch. They usually grow in bushes, but that would have made for a gaudy earring, don't you think?"

Turning it over in his hand, Jack listened to the tiny ring that came from it. "Why are you giving this to me?" "More questions I see. Well, I don't know if I want to tell you what lilacs mean just yet. You'll have to come see me again to find that out." Shutting his lips together, the man pointed to them as Jack went to speak, showing him that he would not explain another word on the matter. _Just like Simon…_ Knowing it was pointless; Jack groaned and put the clasp back in place. "I'll come back then. Is it okay if I bring someone?" "Oh? Might this be the someone you were talking about before in the garden?"

The flush had returned and Sage was already mocking Jack's dramatic expression of shock. Another explosion of joyous laughter hit the walls and swirled around them. The man seemed to live to embarrass his new young friend. "G…Goodbye!" Jack shouted and gathered his things. Once the door shut, the man blew out the extra air of his amusement. "I hope Jack brings Ralph around. I want to see how he's doing," he said to himself, resting his head on his hands to watch Jack take off down the street. "I want to see the one who changed him." _I'll see him again. I know that._

Mortified by the peculiar man he'd just met, Jack made sure to rush into the crowd before he could be made fun of again, though he found himself enjoying it. The feeling slowly faded as Jack remembered what he had to do. Roger in a large crowd was never a good idea. It had happened before and…_God…_ The crowd swarmed in all directions and the red head struggled just to move a few paces from his spot. "Excuse me! Pardon me! Sorry!" He hollered over the chatter, getting nowhere. When he finally found a break in the bustle, his feet dashed for it. The flowers remained tight in his arms just as he had seen Simon do on the island. Unfortunately, the flowers were brushing against his face and his eyes were covered. The next thing he knew, he'd knocked someone flat on the ground, dropping Sage's gift on top of them.

"Oh! I'm sorry!" He apologized, pulling the loose ends of his sweatshirt back in place. The voice that replied to him was muffled, but it was a voice he'd burned into his mind. "R…Ralph!? I…" Jack bit down on his lip, not knowing what to say. He'd just been thinking of Ralph and he wanted to see him, but what was there to say? "Oh…Jack," the blonde replied in a mellow tone while handing back the bouquet. "Angela took off with some strange guy. Have you seen her anywhere?" _Strange guy?!_

Jack's hands whipped to the sides of Ralph's shoulders, jolting him forward to jog his memory. "What did the person look like?! Tell me!" The aggression was surprising, but Ralph answered anyway. "He ran too fast for me to get a good look at him, but he was really thin and had a lot of dark hair. I think it covered his face. Do you know him or something…?" _That's right. Ralph hasn't see Roger since the island. He only knows what I've told him, but Roger knows more…He might do something to Angela…_ "We should look for her. It might be dangerous for her to be with…a stranger." Ralph, worried only about this girlfriend and not the identity of the man, nodded in agreement. "Okay."

The two were just about to leave when Jack realized the bouquet was still in his arms. It would be wrong to endanger the delicate possession he'd just gained. "I'll be back Ralph!" He called and hurried to a small alley before he could be questioned. After searching gingerly through broken glass and garbage, he found a box just big enough to hold the flowers. _I'll have to figure out what to do with them later…Roger will destroy these if he ever found them. _"JACK! HURRY UP!" Shutting the box, the choir boy got to his feet, giving one last glance before taking off after his friend. _Where could Angela be?!_

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Author's Note: OH NO! Where has Angela gone?! Roger a bad bad man! Anyway, this chapter was much longer then expected. I know the other ones will be shorter. So, Sage is Simon's brother, and as you can see, he can read people's thoughts through flowers. I wanted to do something with tarot cards, but I thought this would be more fun. Well, this is the last chapter before 2007! I hope you keep reading The Curse You Gave Me once we reach a new year! Thanks again and have a great holiday! Sadly, school starts again for me on Tuesday, so I probably won't be updating this story for awhile. Thanks for your support!


	10. Chapter Nine

Author's Note: I didn't want to be repetitive or anything, so the last chapter is its own thing now. So anyway, this chapter has all of the important characters in it. (Sage will pop up of course). I hope you enjoy it! And happy New Year (Late I know)! Hopefully, 2007 will bring good things to this story as you all have! Thank you for supporting me! Now in this story, there is foreign language reference, but since I don't speak it and I don't want to screw it up with an online translator, so it will be in _italics like so._

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**Chapter Nine**

"ANGELA! ANGELA!" These desperate cries repeated against the city's buildings. Ralph dashed blindly in any direction with people, his eyes peeled to find his lost girlfriend. Feet behind was Jack, who had already lost his breath and his patience. Angela was not turning up anywhere, and Roger had made it all the more difficult by making himself lost. His teeth clicked as he bit down on the grown out nail on his pointer finger. The habit minimized the gut twisting anguish that prodded Jack's body at the thought of Roger's health. Digging into the pocket of his pants, he reminded himself that something necessary was missing...Something Roger needed. _What's happened? If he's alone, he's in danger, but if he's with Angela…she's in for worse…_

The fountain that sat in the in the middle of the city flourished with fresh water, spilling it over ever side of concrete. A rather lonesome looking girl sat and looked at her reflection. "This is bad…What am I going to do? I can't let Ralph see me like this!" Angela fretted over her features, jumping at every pair of feet that surrounded her. _What am I gonna do?! I don't have enough makeup in my purse!_

She'd already seen both Ralph and Jack, but she avoided them fearfully. "If they see me like this, then brother will get angry." Dabbing her hand on one of her cheeks, a piece of something flesh colored floated to the waters of the fountain and dissolving into nothing. The usually bouncy blonde was distraught beyond anyone else's knowledge. What was happening at that very moment could alter the entire course that had been set from a long time ago. 

The tears only made it worse, and she could only see more of herself with each drop of fright. Cover up rode the tears away from her face and left her looking like someone anew. Her mind thought back to the warning someone had given her the last time they met. _"If anyone sees you the way you really are before I say so, you'll be in trouble."_ "I'll…" "ANGELA!" The hollers were Ralph's and he was closing in. The voice that had foreboded anyone from her true form whipped her feet, urging her to run. _Not now!_ Off she took, just missing a stumbling figure as she dashed away.

Babyish sobs dodged through dispassionate mobs of faceless people. No one seemed to mind the fact that their rough bumping and ceaseless noise was scratching into a throbbing mind like a thousand rusted nails. "Please stop," Roger begged meekly, taking on another careless onslaught of pushes as the other busy residents walked past. "H…Help…" The terrified black eyes turned towards the window of a shop just in time to catch the sun's reflection that bounced in his direction. The bright blades slashed into his skin and shook his entire body. "No! NO NO!" His lungs were pushing air out as fast as they could, but everything seemed to be shutting down. "Shade…Shade…"

The splendid laughter of children circled the walkway leading to a small park. The trees swayed calmly and pranced along with the playful kids. A lone voice hummed as its footsteps rhythmically strolled forward. They dodged puddles and smoothed the path of wet leaves that had cleverly hid themselves against the gravel ground. "Looks like nothing here got drowned out either. I worried too much I suppose."

Sage had a wide grin stretched on his face like always, his eyes taking in the midday scenery. Leaves bowed a hello with drops of refreshing rainwater drumming against the small pools they had created. Two young playmates noticed the upbeat botanist speaking to himself when their small red ball planted itself in his path. Before they could cry out, his height disappeared into a blur of clumsiness, his face drowning itself in the nearest trap of water.

"Why do you always do that? You always tell us to look before we walk! What about you?" Commented a boy with scraggly brown locks who bent down to look Sage in the face. His raspberry colored lips pursed and his head shook back and forth, taking his mop top hair for a spin. A goofy grin surfaced and water jetted out with a spit. The second boy pushed a few strands of black out of his face and gave a few sheepish giggles before helping the man to his feet. "I apologize for my brother. You know how he can be," sighed the young man who turned his attention to his troublesome sibling who'd taken it upon himself to chew into the slippery rubber of the ball he'd played with. "Don't do that!"

Sage rung out a few locks of his hair, shrugging at the little good it did. "I suppose I just must get wet today!" His hands patted the heads below him as he passed, bidding them farewell, but stopping when he was called back. "WAIT! You really need to see this! It's wild!" The ruffian child would not take any answer other than yes, and even though he never got it, he forcefully yanked Sage towards the very path he was planning on taking. "What do you have to show me Oliver?!" The partially unwilling adult queried while trying to slip from the tight grip guiding him towards a strange setting of flowers. "Why are we going so fast?!"

The blonde botanist winced as Oliver dragged him to the ground right in front of the bush, putting his finger to his lips to warn Sage of silence. "You have to be REALLY quiet. It won't move, but there's some kind of monster," whispered the boy, his olive eyes expanding as Sage's hand separated the array of leafy greens. A breathe seeped through the opening. It was panicking and something rushed back and forth. The two discoverers crept forward bit by bit and a branch snapped under a hand. The figure made a strange squeaking sound and something flashed in their direction. Before it could bolt, Oliver pounced and caught hold of something soft. "Oliver, dear dear boy…this is a rabbit…" The earth toned rabbit squirmed ferociously and managed to escape the horrifying humans. "NO! I saw something else here! I swear Sage! I swear! Ask Nicol!" The gesture made was supposed to be for the shy boy next to him, but no one stood beside Oliver. "Wha…NICOL!? NICOL?!"

The impatient hollers had no effect on Nicol, who had taken it upon himself to find where the real treasure lay. It was true, he and his younger brother Oliver had stumbled upon something beneath a bush, but the sounds it made turned them away before they could even gaze upon it. Obviously, it was mobile since it had known of their arrival and ran into a bush of Hollyhocks and Narcissus flowers instead. The odd pairing must have caught the runaway's eyes and Nicol was sure it was where the hider lay. 

The dark haired boy looked over both of his shoulders before crouching down. For some reason, he found it more exciting to uncover the mysterious wonder by himself. Before he took his first movement, a phantom moan crawled from beneath the bush, sounding as though someone was being dragged through shards of broken glass. It forewarned the edgy explorer from proceeding further into the unknown jungle. After considering and reconsidering more than once, Nicol decided to stretch an arm into the rooted bouquet and ended up touching a small piece of softness that caressed his finger. He cocked his head and rubbed two fingers against the silky object. He couldn't quite figure out what the supple strip was. 

Another twitch from the hidden wonder sent his hand back, but his curiosity urged him to force it forward again. He bent down so his stomach pressed into the grass and his grey eyes tried to find any other clue that might be lying around. Coming up with nothing, he followed his first instinct and greedily dove into the protective flowers to find another piece of the warm feeling. His smile grew pleased with each rub and his fingers could not hold back their desire for the material. Something this fluffy and quiet could only mean a gentle creature or a rich trinket. "Let's see if…" Suddenly, a burning pain rung against his wrist and twisted it sideways. A lone hand had pushed its way through the patch and yanked the entire boy into the flowers and onto his back.

A few rays of light pricked his eyes to keep him from fainting. Nicol was a weak child, always giving in to his fears and passing out. His mother had told him that's why his body was the way it was. God didn't have time to make his eyes darker or his skin lighter because Nicol had already passed out. "Ouch," he lamented while rubbing the pain from his temples. "Why were you doing that?" Demanded a bad tempered voice.

Rolling his head sideways, Nicol's face brushed against a darker skin tone. The two eyes glared at him resentfully and the voice spoke with the same irritated tone, if a little weaker for an unknown reason. "Answer me. Why were you doing that? I'm not a puppy!" The tone of the voice coiled around Nicol as if it were a carnivorous python squeezing the sickly life out of him. His words refused to come from the safety of his throat and only his name could be released uneasily. "Nicol…my name…"

"I didn't ask your name. I asked what you were doing!" The fearful explorer found no possible way to respond and shut his eyes, his arms folding in front of his face so their eyes could not meet. He heard an exasperated sigh and braved a look. The sunlight helped him see a little better and a form appeared. It was curled in a black leather jacket and it wore long baggy jeans. Loose ringlet curls fell over the beads of perspiration dotted on his face. A devilishly handsome sufferer. "Oh god sunlight," it roared, crawling over the quiet lad below him without a care. "W…Why hiding…?" Nicol clammed up with the revealing of his accent. 

The shadowy other seemed to take a strange interest in what was just said. "Say something else," he ordered in a hoarse voice, slowly turning to the raven haired foreigner. "Uh…I do not…understanding…what to say…" That was all that was stammered out before the other spoke in a milder manner. "_Don't know how to hide your accent for very long. You are from Ukraine, aren't you?" _The eloquent pronunciation left Nicol a bit stunned, but more eager to answer. _Yes I am. How do you know my language…? You don't look like you are from Ukraine." _

"_My father's an ambassador and I have had the pleasure of going there when I was younger. I guess you have your reasons for being here, especially after the past few years." _A dreadful expression crossed the visible part of the Ukrainian's face and he responded solemnly. _I didn't want to come here, but I didn't want to be there. I didn't have a choice…_ The streams of light that broke through the leaves scattered as a tan hand waved around drearily. _"Please. Choices and free will are all up to you. Any other option would be your own problem."_

"_How would someone who is the son of an ambassador know anything about life? You've probably lived in big houses and seen nothing but light since you've been alive. How would you…" "DON'T! Strangers who stay stuff like that get killed. This is England, not Ukraine, so get it straight. Especially if you ever dare to cross me again. That's for sure," _the faceless voice warned, clearing his throat to try and mitigate the oncoming dizzy spell that was blending his surroundings. _"You sound familiar…Can you tell me your name, if it is alright to ask?" _A dead silence fell between them and Nicol gradually sat up at the rough breathing that his acquaintance began making. "R…Roger…" 

Something wasn't right, Nicol knew that for sure. He bent over Roger, moving the twists of hair from his face. A pair of cold black eyes stared straight at him, never turning away from their current position once. It was as though they were looking nowhere. _"Why don't you speak? Roger? Roger?!" _Roger did not seem like the type to remain at peace for very long, so this situation seemed odd to Nicol, who began to rise in an attempt to call his brother and Sage, but a trembling grip stopped him. "Don't go Jack! Wait!" "Jack, what? Roger what's wrong with y…?!" 

A blade of lightning must have sliced through the drained body, for its repeated jumps were monstrous and couldn't be controlled. Every muscle in Roger's body stood out and his back began pushing off against the ground. The grey in Nicol's eyes watered like melted snow as a tart kiss cut into his lips unintentionally. "I…I be back! Do not worry!" He promised, trying to remain calm and suck away the bite's blood. Roger could feel his grip on the girlish hand loosening and he could only see the number on the boy's wrist before he left him

A crossing from three ways all met in one concluding spot and anyone who took the path would meet up with someone. This time, each path was taken and the meeting was rough. Jack and Ralph were the first to make their stop, catching their breath. The second was Angela, who had been staring in a compact until her boyfriend grabbed hold of her. "Angela!" "Ralph?!" Jack shamefully turned his head away from the reunion, meeting with his newfound friend. "Sage?!" The older man halted at the sound of his name and the two boys behind him stopped. One had a handkerchief pressed to his lip and red seemed to capture more of the white with each passing minute. The other hopped in excitement and urged Sage to continue on. "Jack," the older blonde breathed, switching the position of the limp body in his arms. "ROGER?!" 

"Roger?!" Angela spun around at the name, much to Ralph's surprise and dismay. Both Jack and Angela checked the condition of the lifeless body, but Sage shook his head. "We have no time for this. I'm taking him to the hospital!" The car that would be the transportation was only a few blocks away, and the group of three who found Roger took towards it. "I'm coming with you!" Jack hollered to their backs, sprinting to catch up. After bumbling between her boyfriend and the rush, Angela pursued as well. "WAIT! I NEED TO GO TOO!" The parade of panic was far ahead of him, and Ralph knew not what to do. "So that's Roger…" He'd already been told what this so called 'beast' would do to him, but he seemed harmless…and HIS girlfriend was taking off after him. "Oh hell!" He screamed to the sky as he followed.

"I don't have enough room for all of you! The car only has three other seats," Sage advised in a hurried voice. Nicol and Oliver knew their places were secure, and they slipped into the vehicle without protest from anyone. The other three stood in thought. "I have to go! Please!" Begged Angela, her hands clasped together. "I do also," added Jack with a sigh. Ralph kept his silence and didn't give his opinion to anything. Sage, in no mood for tomfoolery, put his hand over his face and contemplated to himself, snapping his finger when a conclusion hit. "Oliver, you sit with Nicol and you two hold the young boy. Young lady, you sit up front and help me find the hospital. Jack, you and your friend can sit in the back. Since there are no seat belts there, please be careful." 

No one complained or tried to compromise their position. The entire group crowded into the dusty blue contraption and it sped down the street. The only ones talking were Sage and Angela, who bravely directed him through the blurring streets. Nicol kept one hand on his wound and the other on the chest of the one who inflicted it. He pondered what in the world he'd gotten himself into. Oliver, who was already overwhelmed by the adrenaline, was nodding off against the door, never letting go of the treasure. Crouched in the back, Jack kept his hands together in prayer, murmuring any biblical name that came to mind. Ralph eyed him silently, questioning why someone who wanted to plot against Roger would pray for him and why his girlfriend was involved in the mess at all. 

But no one spoke a word…

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Author's Note: Sorry this chapter was kinda jumpy and confusing. I was working on this for hours! Well, this is my first addition for 2007 and hopefully I'll get more viewers, since the numbers seem to go down per chapter. Anyway, thanks for your support, I love you all! Everyone is hiding something, hm? Heads up, the next few chapters will be in the hospital and more of the main problems will arise so keep a look out!

Thanks for reading! 


	11. Chapter Ten

Author's Note: As you have probably noticed, there's been a decrease in the sense and value of my story lately. I can't blame school, I can't blame you guys either, but I've been having trouble for some reason. Anyway, this chapter is another dialogue one basically. A lot of future plot work gets revealed and we figure out some stuff about a few of our main characters. Enjoy this chapter…Happy tenth.

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**Chapter 10**

**Brother and Sister**

Four bodies sat silently in the loudest room in the hospital; the waiting room. Sage had excused himself to make a call a few moments ago, and Jack had been missing from the scene for an entire hour and a half. No doctor had explained Roger's situation, so nothing could be done. Nicol supported his sleeping brother on his knees and kept to himself. Earlier, a worried nurse asked him to come with them to examine the cut on his lip, but he refused repeatedly and remained to keep his brother calm. Angela, who was unusually quiet, kept her head towards the ground. Occasionally, she'd take out her compact and mumble something worrisome to herself. Lastly was Ralph. He didn't even know why he'd followed Angela and why SHE followed anyone in the first place. Roger was the person who wanted him dead, so what good did it bring to Ralph to be near people worrying about him?

To occupy himself, Ralph to a look around the room, noticing all types of waiters with the same expression his girlfriend had. Some were crying and others just sat in a stupor, but they were all hurting. _I don't even belong here…_Another muffled moan from Angela kept him in his seat and feeling just as awkward, if not more, than when they busted through the doors. Six people rushing through a door with an unconscious boy seemed both comical and dramatic at the same time. Either way, Ralph knew he DID NOT want to be there. _What are you thinking Angela…?_

A man in a long white lab coat passed by them and took a long glance at who waited for his patient. He leaned past the wall beside him and crinkled an eyebrow. _What an odd group…_The charts attached to his clipboard had the necessary family information, but only two names appeared on the list. None of the four out of the six who'd brought the enervated patient in looked like either of those two people at all. Fortunately, none of them seemed overly apprehensive about the situation and stayed seated through the long hours. _This should go over well I pray…_

Just as the assured doctor stepped out from his watching spot, the taller blonde man came to sit back down, bringing the miserable looking red head with him. "Okay…" The physician was new to his job and never dealt with a family this big. The other doctors overseeing Roger had told him it wouldn't be a problem, but Dr. Kay couldn't predict what to expect. He adjusted his black and white striped tie and raised his head a bit higher, encouraging himself until he was in their sights. "G…good evening," he stuttered, much to his own chagrin. _Get it right…_

"Is the young boy alright?" The oldest man asked before the doctor could get anywhere with his broken speech. "Oh! He's alive, with much thanks to this young man," he explained, bowing politely to Jack, "We were able to obtain his medical records from the hospital he's registered at. Some of the doctors are still in the process of examining his brain. You see, um…" The unwavering attention was more than Dr. Kay could have asked for. Everyone's eyes focused on his words and there wasn't a questionable look upon anyone's face. "I don't know how many of you knew this, but your friend has epilepsy."

The first question popped up from Oliver, who'd awoke at the sound of voices. "What's ep…ep…?" "Epilepsy," the doctor finished, "It's a reoccurring condition that causes seizures to occur. Now, there are several things that could have caused this, but he's under control now." Oliver rubbed his eyes sleepily, looking towards his brother to explain it in words he could understand. Nicol was at a lost of words himself, but Jack stepped in to clarify.

"Sometimes, when my friend Roger feels extreme amounts of tension and stress, his breathing becomes…strange. Because of that, his body reacts with spasms, which make his body jitter." The older children immediately understood, but Oliver kept handing out more questions and Jack took each one in the calmest manner he could. "Now I do see indications that he has been prescribed some medication," Kay interrupted in the most courteous way he could after flipping to a few notes. "Can anyone explain that to me?"

Once again, it was Jack who had to answer. "I was supposed to give it to him, but I forgot it when we went for a walk. I could have done more, but I lost track of him. You see, sometimes when the sun reflects off objects like mirrors in a certain manor, the blinking lights bring about the seizures. I guess the sun peeking from behind the clouds triggered something." "Can we see him?!" Angela suddenly broke in with sudden urgency. Kay bumbled a bit and checked his notes a third time. "We're only allowing immediate family to see him. He's in a very fragile state and we don't want him to panic and hyperventilate again. Are any of you related to him?" No one nodded, and all the doctor could do was solemnly apologize. "Until a member of his family comes, you cannot speak with him. I'm sorry..."

Oliver slunk back into his seat and sighed, squirming as Nicol's hand rubbed against his curls. The little boy who'd only seen the "monster in the bushes" once seemed completely enthralled with him. Nicol too wanted to know everything he possibly could because there was something he swore seemed familiar about Roger. "Can I speak to you privately please Mr….Merridew is it?" Kay asked after a long pause, taking Jack down another hallway far from the earshot of the waiting party.

Noticing the growing fatigue, Sage offered to find something for the children to eat, excusing himself again in a bit of a hurry. "Everyone's pretty nervous," Ralph pointed out in an attempt to draw Angela's eyes to him. She just agreed halfheartedly with her focus in the small mirror in her hand. She prevented any further talking by standing suddenly, her heavy bangs covering her eyes. "I'm going to the bathroom. I can't think here." Tired of the way she'd ignored him, Ralph held her back. "What is the matter with you all of a sudden? Ever since we've been with these guys, you've been moping! You should be able to tell me these things…"

Angela let her arm swing limply in Ralph's grip and sucked in her bottom lip. He was more persistent than ever. She could tell by the way he stared straight at her face and waited for her words when SHE was ready to say them. "I'm just having a bad day and I got caught up. Jack's my new friend too, so I wanted to see if he would be okay." As she replied, a small shake began moving her hand and the grip on it grew tighter. "I'm just feeling under the weather! Don't worry about me anymore Ralph. I've told you how I am, okay?" In his own mind, Ralph was still unsure of what she was saying, but he outwardly accepted her explanation and received a small peck on the cheek before letting Angela leave his side.

_I guess I shouldn't worry too much…_He'd gotten himself so caught up in Angela's feelings that he forgot about Jack. The spot the doctor had taken him to was now occupied by other doctors and patients and Jack's standout features were nowhere in sight. Jack, out of everyone there, was under the most pressure. He himself admitted to forgetting the important medication Roger needed and the ruffian seemed to be in Jack's care. Ralph realized then that Jack had never filled in all the gaps that were punched into his story.

A lot of prying had been done since their reuniting and everyone was holding back the truth. Ralph was the unfortunate middle man forced into the circle of confusion and pathetic manipulation. In fact, now was the first time Ralph actually stopped to think about it! Who knew if Jack was even telling the truth? He did say that he wanted to kill Ralph and he DID worry about Roger when he was dying. "He even said he wanted my help…and then he did…" _Roger did the exact same thing! _ The hidden puppet master…Someone was pulling all the strings. More than one person possibly. "Damn you Jack…" The young boy fled with his distrust down the closest hallway with the determination of confronting his "friend" Jack.

Blindingly rushing past sickness and cries of pain, Ralph turned corners and made his way towards the one he planned on questioning. "Where is h…?" An abrupt brush against the wall led him directly into an equally spirited soul. He quickly shut out his own adrenaline and bashfully helped up the dark haired runner. Long locks of black recovered their positions around the young girl's shoulders and bracing against her back. She gave a slight shake of the head, keeping it low as if she was ashamed. "Uh…Are you okay? Do you need some help?" Ralph uttered and lifted his arm towards the covered shoulder.

The woman resiliently pushed his forgiving words aside and nonchalantly passed by. "Hey! Wait!" He hollered at the dispassionate ghost of a human, but as expected, she never glanced back at him. "What the hell?! I got distracted again! ARG! Forget this!" Disregarding the lack of sense that meeting made, Ralph was off once again.

On the opposite side of the hospital, Dr. Kay reentered the room that his newest patient lay in. The beeping of the EKG machine remained the only constant sign that Roger was living. He hadn't spoken a word to any of the doctors who had entered and exited during the periods of his attack and his current resting period. Kay squinted slightly against the dim lights that had been drawn down by several requests for the sake of their patient. "I'm glad you're back to normal for now. How are you feeling?" He asked with a toothy grin.

Roger's eyes, the only part of his body not overrun with pulsations of ache and vein like wires, traveled to stare at the other side of the room. No one had heard him speak yet, and Kay wanted to try his hardest to be the very one to help. "Well, you have some visitors to see you. A whole mess of them actually." A nearby chair scraped against the floor until it bumped into Roger's bedside.

Auburn dropped against the stubborn patient as the persistent physician bent over him. "Doesn't that make you happy? Aren't you excited to know how many people care about you?" "None of them care about me. I know that even though I don't know who's out there," a hoarse voice replied grimly. Now, the convalescent found no problem giving an unwelcoming glance upward, warning his doctor silently to stop talking. It did no good though, falling on blind eyes and Kay babbled on about the questions and the expressions of despair all because Roger was in trouble.

Listening to the nonsense that pranced around his bedside was just as unbearable as the IV that drove into his veins. On and on! _This idiot doesn't even know what he's talking about! I don't even know half the people he's mentioned! The ones I do…Ugh! Those bloody terrors! Jack is probably all over Ralph right now…That filth. And that other boy…The weird one with the number on his arm. He exposed me to the light! It's HIS fault I'm in this mess!_

"Honestly! It's a wonder you aren't begging to see them as we speak!" The murky bitterness spreading in Roger's mind gave him a break from the naïve speech. His eyes shut to release the image of the man from his sights, giving the clue that the gloomy patient had no intention of listening further. "I'm sorry; I just want you to be comfortable. You don't seem anything like your friend Jack said you were…" _Jack spoke to this quack!?_ A disgusted snort jutted past Roger's discolored lips and he managed to move his head back and forth once before it rolled back into the mound of soft pillows.

"It's bloody shit doctor and that's the truth. I couldn't care less about the ones who came for me. They only came because they felt guilty." The doctor decided to ignore the offensive word choice and hear out his patient, who would probably keep himself shut up after this. "I bet Jack told you how I love to drink alcohol, any kind at all! And he probably said I smoke like a burning chimney or some rubbish like that! Did he tell you how aggressive I am or the fact that I throw away half the pills for my epilepsy?! DO YOU GET IT?! I DON'T CARE WHAT HE TOLD YOU! HE'S GUILTY BECAUSE HE FORGOT ABOUT ME AND HE'S TRYING TO MAKE UP FOR IT!"

A swell of howling coughs choked Roger's ferocity and concluded his words. Kay would have attempted to pursue a further explanation, but the dilation that added soot to the already coal eyes advised the doctor not to. He just kept his eye on Roger until he seemed to calm down, if only for a second. A knock came at the door, but it opened before the exhausted Kay could reach it. The figure must have known the one in the bed, because it slid into the room with the least amount of light possible. "Hey! You can't be in here!"

"Please don't get yourself worked up Dr. Kay. I AM a member of this wild child's family. I have proof right here." Kay felt a document pushed into his palms carefully. After looking it over, he clarified it as a birth certificate, and the name did match one of the two that had been listed. Handing the paper back, Kay gave a relieved sigh and patted the shadow on the shoulder. "Thank you for coming miss. Your brother is doing a little better, so please do what you can to make him feel better. I'll leave you with that and come back to check up in a few hours."

Upon the shutting of the door, the more visible young woman sat in the spot Kay once took. Her lips pecked against Roger's cheek annoyingly with a shower of kisses until he ordered her to stop. "You think you're so funny!" He shouted, trying his hardest not to smile. "Aw! Why are you always so mean to me? I've done so much for you lately. I even brought this!" Roger forced his eyes to watch the fluttery fingers as they dove into a black leather purse and drew out his one true friend. "Josef…"

Unable to attain the beloved treasure on his own, Roger willingly complied with his sister's folding of his arms. She gently put one over the other and snuck the stuffed animal snuggly in between. After adjusting back in her seat, the young girl spoke again while stroking the sweaty strands of hair on Roger's head. "You're probably mad at me for coming out like this so soon, but I have so much to tell you! You'll listen to me, right?" She implored in a fast manner, guessing he would interrupt as he usually did. Instead, he took the effort to roll his head to face his sibling. "Tell me everything you know sister," he ordered devilishly.

Roger's sister grinned widely, happy to spill the information she'd gained since their last real meeting. "Beforehand, I want to let you know that father is well. He misses you and wishes you'd come home. He goes on and on about your health! Roger this, Roger that! He even…" Impatiently, Roger injected his lack of caring for the subject by sticking out his tongue. "Don't beat around the bush!" "Alright, alright!" The miss's tan hand flew to her raven hair and tossed it about in a smug manner as though she'd defeated her brother for a brief moment. "How are those two…?"

"They're at wit's end brother. I waited for Jack outside of his building as you told me to. He didn't see any of you in me and his trust was easy to get. You were right in suggesting the graves as a place to find Ralph, so I led your friend there. I planted a nice big one on Ralph and Jack took off. Of course, this wasn't new since I'd played around with Ralph like you told me to, though Jack got him in bed first." Roger groaned as his sister gave a small giggle, proving her immature age. "Shut up and tell me more!"

"Well, I pretended to believe that Ralph really hurt himself and that the hickey wasn't a hickey. Hee, he's so gullible! Then I took him into the park just like you asked until I saw you. After we talked, I had to…check my makeup and then I got caught in this whole mess…Once we were here, I acted upset and took off. I knew Ralph was distressed but when I ran into him in the hall later on, I knew he was looking for Jack. I don't know where they are now…so…that's all I can tell you."

The young lady's hair wisped around one shoulder when she looked down, ashamed at the lack of knowledge she could provide for her ailing brother. "It's perfect. It's perfect!" He cried, half mad with the notion of sitting up. Once his company helped him with said task, he looked her directly in the face and a never before seen smile came to his own. "Sister, you did everything I've asked. You put them right where I wanted them!" The stiffness in his arms wouldn't permit him to embrace her, but she caught on and threaded her arms around him. "I'm glad I made you feel a little better brother, right? Didn't I?" "Oh you certainly did."

Roger pulled back to examine his sibling at arms length and he twisted his mouth to one side. "You got rid of all your makeup. You look so much better when you look like me." The arrogant brother observed his younger sister squeal gaily. All she wanted was to please her brother. "Roger, what do we do now that Ralph's confused again? We're back to where we started basically…" She spoke the truth, and everyone involved in the sadist's malevolent plot seemed to have reverted to their original ways. Ralph, clueless and untrusting of anyone, and Jack, torn and naïve. "Yes, but we won't let this go as far as it did the first time. I can tell you that much RIGHT NOW!"

Roger's fingers drummed against the cheap fabric of his hospital bed and he quickly became overcome with thought. His sister felt that she was to blame for not doing her job, and she wanted to do anything to help her brother. Anything. "Roger, we need to isolate Jack and I know just how to do it." The purse that sat in her lap snapped open once again and the small hand reaching into it retracted with a small blade between its fingers. Drawing up the side of it to her face, the girl gleamed evilly with the face of her brother. "I can manipulate Jack into thinking we're going to harm Ralph. He's too weak minded to speak up, so he'll come back to your hide out. You'll be in bed a lot, and you can keep him from leaving. In the meantime, I'll be going back and forth between you two and Ralph."

"One problem," interrupted the second schemer, "Do you plan on revealing both of your identities to them? It could spoil everything." His sister pouted and gave him a little push. "Don't underestimate me. I learned what to do from you. I'll keep wearing the makeup and wig for Ralph. I'll come up with a stupid excuse for my actions today some other time. When I come for Jack, I'll be without my makeup and my regular voice. He's bright, but he won't know the difference. What could be better brother?!"

The girl loyally sitting to his right was the only person who was capable of shocking Roger. The child who had gone along with the plan even before Jack did was coming out of her shell. For Roger, she would pretend to be a bubbly girlfriend of someone she only knew as her brother's incarcerator. The same little girl would hold a knife to his enemies and do whatever he ordered her to. Yet, her only complaint came to be that she "wasn't doing enough" for him. All from this little girl…

"Sister, did I ever thank you for what you did so far…?" The dark haired smiler placed the weapon back into her purse and scooted a little closer onto the bed before nodding. "Of course big brother! That's why I'm helping you. I want you to be happy like…before…" Roger thanked his body for the strength to hold his sister for a bit as he whispered her name gratefully. "Angela…"

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Author's Note: Sorry the whole Angela thing was so obvious by the time she entered the room, but that's just the way I wanted to do it. I wonder if people hate her, cuz that would be kinda cool…She and Roger are quite a pair of siblings…There are going to be a few other of these chapters, and they will all have sub headings to pretty much show that is in the majority of the chapter. I've thought it over, and I've decided to put this story on hiatus. I've been rushing too frequently to update and it's hurting the story. It loses suspense as well, which I can't go without. I'm going to go to AnimeSpiral and attempt to restore some of my work on there to its former glory. Thank you for your support and I hope you'll wait for my return in either spring(if things go well) or summer(if things don't go so well or I decided to wait). All I can say is that I'm glad you all helped me get this far, and I hope I can get even further when I return. Love and Thanks!


	12. Chapter Eleven

Author's Note: Wow. I can't believe a year has gone by and I haven't touched this story. Junior year was nothing like I expected, but I'm trying to get back into the fanfiction mode, and I'm gonna edit some of the old chapters eventually. I've reread the story and am currently thinking of new developments and such to make the story continue. Thank you for the continuing support. Every time someone reviewed my story so long after I'd last written or someone else put up a watch/favorites on the story, it brought me back on the site and made me want to continue. I will try my hardest! Thank you all! OH! And this upcoming chapter is going to be a little like the last one. It's becoming characters and strategy for the future. Read carefully. OH! Side note, this chapter goes between the present and flashbacks(italics).

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**Chapter Eleven**

_A whole day, they had been at this hospital a whole day. The bustling hospital never stopped its wispy white figures and only one remained somewhat solitary. Jack sat by himself among the empty pews of the hospital chapel. Rain water dripped from every edge of his body as he whispered silently to the unseen presence in the room. "I'm so confused." Another drip fell from his drooping hair onto his tight lips. "Why did I go out in the rain…?"_

Jack escaped the hallways full of medical shelves and people howling in pain. He kept his eyes forward, jaw clenched tightly, trying not to think of what Roger might be going through. No matter how much Jack hated that boy, it was HIS fault…Moving faster, he returned to the alley of puddles and broken glass, treading carefully to find his hidden treasure. "I swear I left it around here somewhere…" He muttered to himself, biting the knuckle of his finger.

"Jack, you don't need to look so hard. I'm afraid you're becoming even more paranoid," joked the voice behind him. Sage, the voice's owner, bent down with a slight laugh and retrieved the dewed bouquet from the sagging box Jack had forgotten. "I'm sorry, I'm just…" The red head shook in disbelief at the events falling into his lap. He couldn't even believe himself! Leaving his dependent to retrieve flowers from an absolute stranger. Despite this self confusion, he cradled the bouquet as if they were springing children, while Sage happily began driving back toward the hospital. The wise eyes peeked towards the silently conflicted Jack, never saying a word, but making the young boy nervous. After sighing, Jack counted ten long seconds of quiet before jumping in. "Is there a…" "Who are those flowers going to be for Jack?" As expected, there was a question to be answered, and Jack's timing was perfect.

If only the answer was blatantly obvious…if only Jack could answer right away, letting Sage know there was one he cared about more than the other. To give himself more time to think, he did the only thing he could, stall. "Who…do you mean exactly? There are a lot of people I could give these flowers to. My parents, my pastor, the church, m…" The rambling slowed as Jack's light eyes noticed the car was heading for an empty parking lot rather than the expected destination, and Sage's suddenly solemn voice stated simply, "Ralph and Roger. The names you said in my garden. Ralph and Roger. Roger and Ralph. And then, there is you, Jack." After a short jolt, the car came to a stop and the botanist turned to face his acquaintance. "Please don't take me for a fool," the serious voice began, "I may be a bit odd, but I'm in tune with this world…I know you, I know you."

"What are you talking about?" Jack questioned quickly, feeling uncomfortable with Sage for the first time. He pushed his back into the soft material of the seat and gripped the icy flowers, pushing back his true answer deep into his throat. "Oh! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to scare you!" Sage jumped, the hard stare broken, "But as I said before, I know you. I can sense your emotions, just as I did back in my gardens." Though Jack had the urge to ask who this man truly was, or if he was even human for that matter, there was no way he could interrupt the voice speaking to him. It held a calm power over him. A trust. "Your life is yours, but I know you need help. I knew it as soon as you walked in my door," Sage continued, his fingers propping against his smiling face, "And I will be the one to help you."

"H…help…me?" The rosy smiled remained. "Yes, with all of my resources and honesty…I shall help you, but first, you need to know and understand yourself, so please, Jack, answer my question. Who are those flowers for?" "The…the…" The pressed choir boy felt his gold cross stretching across his heartbeat which sent a code…a name…the one he knew he wanted to say, the one he knew would start everything. "The flowers are for…" With an answer in his ear, Sage glanced towards the grassy fireworks in Jack's arms, while a Lily of the Valley perked ever so slightly.

_Shivering as he looked upon the the light shining in the window, Jack shook his head slightly. "Tell me what to do now. Which way do I go…? Dark or light. God…" The solitary voice echoed, flying up the glass windows to search for a higher answer. "God, who do you want me to choose…?" Should I remain in darkness…?_

Returning from the outside, Jack immediately headed towards the room he dreaded most. Each step clacked heavily, every movement becoming heavier as the invisible chains of a demon dragged the choir boy onward. _Just take the knob…_ The pure hand froze at the slightest touch of the door that would unleash him into the hospital's darkest depth. No matter how many breathes he took, oxygen would not supply the courage he needed to face this demon. _I have to do this…or Sage…_His hand finally sprang forth, falling short as the door opened to reveal a raven beauty. "Oh? Why brother, I think your guest appeared just as you predicted!" The sultry voice exclaimed, touching her hand slightly to her cheek with a raised brow. The resemblance was impeccable! _There's…more like him?_

Before the new face spoke again, Roger flung his upper half forward, wincing as he stretched out his arms childishly, squirming his fingers in excitement for a touch of pale skin. "Roger…" Jack sighed, pushing past the doorkeeper to the feeble appearance before him. "I'm so sorry that I wasn't there. I knew I forgot something. Please…don't be…" Roger waved his first guest out of the room, lowering his eyebrows as the door shut. Jack turned quickly at the sound, nervously turning back and sitting on the bed's edge, leaning close enough to fulfill Roger's need for touch. "Uh…please don't be angry with me," he continued, gradually fitting his arms around the wiring of IVs, "I don't plan on leaving you again. I promise."

With every gentle word, Roger's dark eyes narrowed a little further and his fingers crept a little more up the back he held so tightly. A weakly sinister laugh mocked Jack's promises, stopping him instantly. "Jack, Jack, Jack. You know I'll always forgive you. I'm all you have, so I can't abandon you," whispered the snake like voice as it coiled around its prey, "You're that pathetic." _Pathetic_. Roger's weight began shifting as he saw a hint of chill in Jack's glances, the beat of the EKG machines speeding up. "R…Roger, you should be resting!" Jack scolded, leaning backwards as tubes flew back, liquid following suit as Roger's claws tore out his lifelines. "Rest? HA HA HA! Jack! I'm exhilarated! I don't need sleep!"

Another domination was coming, Jack could feel it in the satanic nails that traced his body. Carnivorous teeth gnawed at his buttons, exposing his flushed chest. The curly mop rested upon it, breathing in and out in a strangely quiet way. "Jack," the voice mumbled, "Why do you smell like flowers?" Jack inched his head upward, watching the curious patient move his twirl his fingers, glancing up with an odd smirk. "Oh, you like it? I was able to buy some…" Before finishing, Jack let out a rush of air as Roger used all of his strength to push down his elbow into the sweating stomach below him. "Flowers?! FLOWERS?! Disgusting! You thought I would die that quickly?! You think I want that bloody garbage?! If they're for me, BURN THEM! BURN THEM!"

The demonic eyes cast forth flames as the words hit Jack in the face, his light eyes wide open in shock. His hands quivered as they held his lips, coughing several times. The impact of the blow was gone, but something else seemed to be destroying him. The psychotic tirade ceased, and a hand grasped Jack's cheek. "Sick? Oh Jack, I'm disappointed," Roger said as his other hand lowered, his mouth right against Jack's ear. "Nothing in this world can torture you but me. That's why you're mine." Both of their eyes dropped to the spot above Jack's heart. _Mine._ Jack's otherwise ivory skin was colored a dark red with the lines and loops of a tattoo. "You're my Mercury Jack, and I see you boiling, but…heh…you're nothing. That's what I'm here for. I'll give you your shape." Roger flicked his finger against the shape, giving one last laugh. "Don't forget that."

A sigh fled through Jack's lips as Roger barred his own tan chest, revealing another alchemic tattoo. "Antimony holds the metals together, and you're only a liquid. Remember?" Jack's nerves began winding down, though Roger seemed to be becoming more nerved himself and less sane by the minute. The ticking of the clock at the room's corner reminded Jack that he had learned all he needed to. _Finally, I'm done_. Noticing Roger staring at his own hands, the choir boy began retreating, turning his back to the sadist behind him. His steps alerted Roger that he was leaving, and the same demonic hand began reaching out again. "STOP!"

The single word shot across the room like a bullet and knocked Jack over. He let out an aching cough and dropped to his knees. Roger froze, gasping at the power of his command. "J…" "No! No, it's not you. I'm just a little dizzy," reassured the distant voice as the door opened, "Something else might have a tighter grip on me, that's all..." Roger retracted as light carried Jack out, clenching his fists as the last words remained. _I'm…losing?_ A vulnerable sob unlike any Roger had made before passed, soon turning into a growl as a flash of red hinted in his eyes. _I'm not letting you leave!_

_Shaking his head, water droplets wet the bench beneath him. The memories of hours past was making the decision worse. "I…" Jack began, still speaking to the unknown presence. "I owe Roger. He kept me alive for so many years when I wanted to die…but I still want to die…" His hand sat above his heart, feeling the beat against the cursed tattoo. Mercury… "But Ralph…What do I do about him?" What about the light?_

The entire group was gone, and Ralph was alone. Sage had taken the sleepy Oliver away, while Nicol had disappeared hours before. Jack too, seemed to be rushing all about, eventually never returning to the room. What worried Ralph the most was Angela. Ever since she'd been in such a hurry to accompany Roger, Ralph felt a deep twist in his stomach. What business could she have with that… "Ugh…psycho…" His restlessness got the better of him, and his feet took over. No direction, no place to go, they just walked.

Every step made the tired blonde question himself even more. "What am I even doing here? Angela has to be gone by now…There's nothing else…here for m…" A tall figure cut off his sentence and his path as Jack knocked into the wall on Ralph's right. "RALPH!" Jack's urgency was surprising, and Ralph winced slightly as his shoulder was grabbed. Jack's red hair covered his face, floating up and down as his breathes grew heavier. "Finally…found you," he gasped. "What are you talking about Jack? You're the one who left…"

Jack continued to catch his breath while Ralph inched away slightly. He rubbed his neck, feeling a radiating heat from the mark Jack gave him. His face soon burned just the same, but uncomfortably so. _Why does he keep coming after me? I have to find Angela_. "I have to go…Uh…I'm sure you have to see Roger…" "NO! WAIT!" Once again, Ralph was caught off guard, but this time a hand didn't need to keep him in his place, he stopped. "Ralph, please let me talk to you! We never really talked about what happened bef…"

Ralph immediately covered his ears, shaking his head violently. "No! There's nothing more to talk about! Unless you know where my GIRLFRIEND is, I can't talk to you!" For some reason, Ralph found that he couldn't bear to hear anything about that incident. He just wanted the mark to go away and act like nothing ever happened. _Please just leave me alone_. He heard his own fast breathing as he listened to Jack's incoherent voice, watching every lip movement as the choir boy desperately tried to speak up. His eyes flashed with helplessness, but he kept his hand from pulling Ralph to attention. He could only plea to the deaf ears. "Ralph, please!" "Jack, NO!" The tension mounted until finally, one gave out. Jack held his chest, gasping for air as he sunk to the ground. "Jack?!"

"F…Finally, will you listen to me Ralph?" The strained voice asked, a little glimmer of hope within it. _Darn it Jack, what's this for?_ Ralph obliged silently. "I want you to survive Ralph. You need to know that. I don't care about the past anymore, or the island, or Roger or…anything. Just please, know that I care…I…" A fit of coughs ended the heartfelt speech, giving Ralph a moment to take in the confession. He sat against the wall, wishing his heart would stop beating so loudly. "Come on Jack…I already told you. I don't think we should…"

"I'm not asking that," interrupted Jack, suddenly snatching Ralph into a shaky embrace. "I just want you to know that I'm trying to be better, and I'm trying to be here for you, even if just for a…little…longer…" As before, Ralph's arms denied Jack full access to the comfort of his heartbeat. "What are you talking about? If this is about Roger and you, I can handle it. You don't have to help me." Ralph felt the weight of Jack's head burying into his shoulder, and the blonde could only breathe in… "Hey Jack." Relieved that Ralph was even speaking to him, Jack listened. "Why do you smell like flowers?" It was the same question.

Ralph leaned forward slightly, noticing the hand Jack had yet to move was clenched tightly to a blossoming bouquet. "I bought them from a friend, but I didn't know what to do with them. They're not my type of thing…I'll probably just throw the old things away or put them in the church." Jack spoke hesitantly, remembering the last reaction he received. "Oh. They smell nice, and you shouldn't waste them on the boring church." Ralph's blue eyes stared at the flowers for a long time. _Simon would have loved these_. "You could always put them on…a grave," Ralph hinted, noticing Jack's face frown a bit. "Actually, uh…I'll take them."

"Really?!" A few petals flew as the flowers fell into Ralph's arms. "What are you getting all excited for?" Ralph huffed as he adjusted his arms, glancing up at Jack who was already on his feet, breathing heavily. The light from the windows blazed with his hair, casting a shadow over his eyes as they looked down at Ralph. "What's the matter now? I took your flowers." Jack would have replied, but he was forced to stifle a violent outburst of coughs with his hand, bending him closer to Ralph's fearful eyes. "What's the…" A pale and shaking finger sealed Ralph's lips as Jack weakly explained.

"If I told you I needed to go soon…disappear soon, would you give me the chance to have you with me?" One finger became two, as more of Jack's fingers connected with the blush on Ralph's face. "You aren't making any sense! Just tell me what's going on!" "What's going on is I…don't think I'll be around much longer. I just want you to let me at least KNOW this Ralph! I know you're different. I'm not the only one who's changed," Jack stated, losing his voice the more he talked. With one final sigh, he pressed his forehead against Ralph's, forcing eye contact. "Can you at least wait for me a little while?" _Just a little while…_Ralph shut his eyes, unable to ignore the frantic breathing that was pushing his hair. "Jack…" His clenched fist shook his floral gift before he shot his eyes open.

"Are you kidding me?! What's gone wrong in your head?!" Jack had no time to retaliate before Ralph continued. "This is real life Jack! This is not a fictional story, and I'm not a fictional person! I can't just sit around and wait for you like the girls in bloody novels! I have a life to live, and you do to!" The tension in Ralph's mind was building with the red on his face. "No more romance Jack! No more drama! I haven't been able to figure ANYTHING out since you've been around, and you look terrible! If this is what I'm doing to you…" _I can't start crying…_

No matter how much the blue eyes wanted to deny their emotion, they spilled forth tears onto Ralph's cheeks as he began to shake harder. "Just leave me. You don't need to die for me. Just do what you need to do to live! I'm not your heart…I can't keep you going…" The rest of his words were carried away with his tears. Jack, who had remained silent until now, seemed to breathe a bit easier, smiling contently. He pressed his lips forward quickly, in case the tearing blonde wouldn't respond. Surprisingly, one hand tapped Jack's cheek while the flowers rested between them. For once, Jack had to pull away, lifting Ralph's head slightly. "Remember me, okay?" The deep voice whispered softly, a single finger brushing the bite still on Ralph's neck. The shaking blonde remained on the ground, grasping his bouquet tightly. _I'm so confused…_For once, the hospital was a little silent. _Jack…or…Angela…_

_Light and dark, Ralph and Roger. The answer seemed so clear, but Jack still felt lost within the world around him. He sat in the church, contemplating everything he'd done. Why hadn't his faith kicked in? "When will you tell me where to go?" One last time, the red head bowed in prayer. For a deep, long moment, Jack pulled himself together and finally decided to choose a path. "Someone is finally willing to help me. I need to do this." Turning to his left, the choir boy exited the chapel, kissing his cross as he silently mumbled, "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path…" The chapel doors shut._

The rain outside had ended, but the damp clouds that had been hanging over the equally gloomy hospital remained. Sage sat on a creaking bench with the same smile on his face as always. Beside him sat Nicol who had pulled his knees close together while his grey eyes stared at the ground, waiting. "Jack has been gone longer than you said he would," his unsure voice observed, "I cannot take much more of waiting." Sage chuckled a little, crossing his legs and looking forward. "Be patient. He's right there." Nicol anxiously looked ahead to see Jack hurrying towards them. "I did what you asked!" He called.

"Good for you," Sage said, still partially laughing himself, sliding over to give Jack a seat beside him. "I should have known you to be a good actor considering who you hang around with." Jack went along with the joke, but quickly changed the subject. "Why did you have me act so desperately? I really upset Ralph and if I know Roger, he'll only be angrier." The name Roger brought Nicol's attention into the conversation. He rubbed his sore lip which had pained him since he'd been kissed. _Such an odd boy…_

"Anymore questions?" the older man asked in the same nonchalant voice. Jack responded immediately, jumping to his feet to face the exhaustingly calm man. "Yes! Can you please explain to me why you called Nicol and me here. You're hiding something…I felt it ever since we were finding the flowers. I've led and been led before, but I have no idea where you're taking me! All I know is I'm becoming part of something. Just tell me what it is!" A flock of birds flying by caught Sage's attention, and he traced their line across the sky. Jack desperately looked towards the brooding figure to Sage's right for some kind of answer. "You are not used. Come, I explain this to you." Jack obliged as Nicol's arm led him away from the still relaxed blonde.

"Sage feels compassion for you and your friend Ralph. I feel interest to your friend Roger. Sage asks me to help you, I will help you. Simple as that." Nicol seemed to have his own nonchalant act, ducking under a tree branch and looking upward. Jack followed slowly, choosing his words carefully as the young man who walked ahead of him did not seem like the kind to give up information. "Can you tell me how anything can change at all? I was just in there messing up both of my relationships. What does that do?!"

"You are smart not jumping in on this without knowing…Sage has figured that there is only one way that you can leave Roger, but you need to be willing to sacrifice." Nicol stretched his lean body against a tree, raising an eyebrow as a sign of question. "Getting it yet?" Jack nodded slowly, recalling his recent actions to help him. "Sage says little because you speak a lot. At this point, you need to trust what goes through his mind, even if he acts oddly, which he always does." Their eyes met and Jack finally posed a question. "Should I trust you? You aren't the same person you were when we walked into this place."

As soon as Jack's blue eyes got a look into the emotionless grey, he felt as though his whole mind was mixing. _He's a mystery…_ "Trust me or no trust me. You won't be seeing much of me." The dreary color looked away as Nicol put his hand against his chest. "I'm a sacrifice for your sake and my interest. In my experience, I learn to be like shadow. That is it." Eye contact broke as Jack felt his own eyes were turning the same depressed shade as the dark haired boy before him. Everything he said was questionable, and his personality froze Jack's spine almost as quickly as Roger. _How strangely perfect…_ "I guess I have no choice then," Jack said with a newly cheerful inflection, pressing the cross of his necklace against his chin. "Please God, let this be right…"

Nicol watched the calm choir boy for a moment, then pushed past him like a cool wind. "I hope Roger isn't much for your type. I don't associate with gods…" Normally, Jack would have argued such an appalling comment, but he'd said enough for today. He remained silent, following the shadow back to Sage, who was now standing with his arms crossed. "I hope we haven't completely ruined your day. I promise things will make more sense later." Jack sat down again, watching the botanist take two large books from his jacket pocket. "I need you to look this over," he said, handing him a dust covered blue book. Reading the peeling letters on the cover, Jack found he was to be reading Shakespeare. "Why would I need this?"

"Romantic inspiration, or maybe just something to read," the humorous blonde said with a giggle. Jack sighed, looking at Nicol who shrugged, silently reminding Jack of his earlier statement. _He really is that strange._ "And this second book, which I'm sure you're more familiar with, is something you need to keep with you at all times." A pocket copy of the Bible fell into Jack's lap. "Why this version? There's even more pages." Before Sage could hand Jack another odd answer, the ring of the clasp that had been on Jack's ear wriggled and snapped. Jack hurried to pick up the pieces, looking wide eyed as he held the shattered lilac replica in his hands. "I'm so sorry! I don't know how that happened!" He panicked. _This day just gets worse and worse._

"Don't worry Jack, I built this," said Sage with returning maturity, "and you'll grow to find out that everything revolving around me happens for a reason." After looking at his watch, the smiling botanist took the earring and placed it in his pocket. Seeing the bewildered expression Jack had, Sage gave a sympathetic smile. "Don't worry, it just gives you a reason to come find me in a few days. Getting back fixed jewelry isn't so suspicious, is it?" With that, Sage excused himself and began to walk back around the hospital. Jack peered up to Nicol, who still watched him. Attempting to take off any remaining confusion, Nicol gave him a weak smile. "You need to learn to take steps. You are just seeing path before you, so do not expect to see the end. You answered his question, right?"

"What question?" _There have been too many questions…_ "You answered Sage's question about the flowers. You don't have them with you, so you must have answered it." Jack thought back again to the car ride that began his new situation while Nicol smiled again, walking away. "I gave the flowers to Ralph, who else…?" Jack said silently to himself, resting his head on top of the bible he'd just received, finally getting a moment of peace. _Who else?_

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Author's Note: Forgive me if this was confusing. I had to put a lot of change into the story, requiring flashbacks and such. A lot of stuff is symbolism here(research the elements, its interesting). I'd say that this chapter provides a good idea of character's personality(minor ones like Oliver and Angela will return later, as well as SamnEric). Oh, and any grammar errors you find in Nicol's speech is intentional(as we find out previously).I hope I can update more often! OH! And disclaimer on Jack's lamp verse(Bible quote Psalm 119:105). I feel reallllly out of practice.


	13. Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve

Author's Note: This is a character revealing chapter, so there's more dialogue and interesting interaction among characters. Enjoy!

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**Chapter Twelve**

It had been two whole days since Roger was released from the hospital, and he hadn't allowed Jack to leave his side once since then. The rather tall and mysterious female who had bumped into Jack on his way into Roger's room was the outside world's messenger, retrieving medicines and any other necessity to suit Roger's short temper. Jack became more and more suspicious as letters and boxes began to pile up in the factory. If nagging headaches hadn't plagued him, he would have figured it out himself, but this time, he had to ask the still weak mastermind.

Roger's female double had begun setting up a tray full of tea, dragging two chairs across the concrete floor of the abandoned warehouse for herself and Jack. Roger, who had been silently brooding since his return, sat up for the first time in his two day rest. His coal eyes fell over the coffee, which he specifically asked for. "Did you put anything in it?" His hoarse voice grumbled. "No, of course not!" His sister responded with a giggle. "I know you like it black." The invalid was quick to swallow a cupful of the mix, holding out his cup as his sister poured another glassful. In the meantime, his gaze fell upon the choir boy, who remained still, a slight shiver in his shoulders. "Jack…"

The sound of his name almost caused Jack to lose his composure completely. His blue eyes spread out and he clenched tightly onto his cup, letting the scent of chamomile float towards his lips. "JACK!" Roger waited impatiently as attention fell to him. "We've been waiting too long with our original plan. You got caught up in your little "love games" and I was in the hospital. Luckily, my sister is here to help us." Jack kept quiet for the time being, seeing storm clouds building around Roger's curly head. "I'm sure you've been wondering why I've got all these boxes and letters." The answer to the question was unfolding.

Roger slowly lifted himself off of his bed, taking his tin mug with him as he wandered the room barefoot. Slamming his hand down on a box, his devilish grin returned. "You remember my father, don't you Jack?" "The ambassador? Yes, I do," Jack answered, thinking of the stern, dark figure in perfectly tailored suits. The man no one believed had raised the beast that became Roger. "Well, let's just say I finally got my allowance. Weapons!" The red was crawling into Roger's eyes, and Jack swallowed hard. "We...Weapons? What in the world do you plan on doing with weapons?!" Angela, who sat patiently beside Jack, giggled deeply in her throat. "Silly, how do you expect to kill someone without a weapon? Roger told me all about your little friend Ralph. He's tough and he's fast. That's why you need these."

Jack saw Roger flip his wrist out of the corner of his eye as Angela caught a flashing piece of metal. "A gun?!" "Brother, haven't you taught your friend anything at all?" The sultry voice asked while the gun was loaded. "Don't underestimate him Angela. He's not as stupid as he seems," Roger responded as he walked behind Jack, stretching his arms around his lean neck. A rough hand slapped against his cheek and Roger could feel Jack's teeth clench tightly as fingers traced his cheekbone. "You look even paler than you usually do…You said you were feeling better. What, oh what, is my little Jack doing?"

"He's leaving for a bit," Jack sighed, standing and leaning slightly as Roger climbed onto his back. Ignoring the slight weight on his shoulders, Jack headed towards the light of the slightly open door. Roger growled, stubbornly keeping his arms tight enough to choke. "You'd better not see him again. Don't forget what I've told you." Tilting his head around the red hair, Roger looked into Jack's face. He was just smiling. His hand slowly moved towards the door's edge as if taunting Roger with loneliness despite his sister's presence. "If you want me better, you have to let me go." _Let me go._

Jack gagged as the serious Roger tightened his grip, not amused by the jokes. "Ugh! I'm just going to the doctor! You're the one who wants me better!" While Jack had time to catch his breath, Roger slowly slid off his back, landing in a seated position on the concrete floor, his legs bent out like a confused child's. He felt a strange pull in his body as his confidant nonchalantly began stepping through the door. Small sob like noises began shooting out again, stopping the footsteps long enough for Roger to call his name and throw the sweater Jack had left behind. Catching it, Jack flashed another smile, irritating Roger further. "Thank you." "Shut up! I just want you coming back. Don't die you twit!" With that, their backs turned to each other and Roger kicked the door shut with his barefoot.

"Little brother, why are you acting so emotional? It's just the doctor. He's not going to die," Angela said in half surprise, watching Roger crawl under his quilts, the mop of black hair popping up to the pillow. "Maybe your fangs aren't as sharp as you think they are." She sat beside her younger brother, gently petting his head. When her hand reached the tan skin, it quickly retracted. "You sure about that sister?" Looking down, Angela watched blood pour from two small gashes in her hand. With a small sigh, pulling together a weak smile through tears, she stood. "I'll be back later…okay?" The still faithful sister left Roger's stuffed companion by his side and shut the door behind her. Beneath the sheets, the demon never seemed smaller and his cries never seemed louder. The only one left to watch him was his small stuffed animal.

Meanwhile, Jack had just left his appointment and hurried home. In his hands were newly bought sunglasses and in his walk was a slight tip. Never looking back, he hid his shimmering blues behind the shade, keeping his body pressed tightly together as he moved. His head never looked up until he'd traced all the way back to his seemingly forgotten apartment. It had only been a few days, but they'd been the longest ever and they would only grow.

Reaching for his key, Jack was surprised to find that his door was already opened. _I don't see Roger's boots…_Slowly; he entered the room and shut the door behind him, seeing no traces of a presence anywhere. He took off his sunglasses and set them down carefully, preparing to look through the doorways. Suddenly, a loud ring sent him flying into the wall, his hand over his mouth to keep from overreacting any further. After waiting a few moments, his unsteady hand held the phone to his ear. "Where are you?" An unusually quiet voice questioned.

Jack's mouth hung open for a moment as he figured out who was on the other end. "Roger? Yeah, I'm here. What's wrong?" While he spoke, the red head's knees began giving way and he had to drag the phone along to his bed just in time to save himself from the hard floor. Getting himself together, he held up the receiver again, but no sound came from the other end, just muffled cries. _Why now?_ "Roger, what's the matter? Do you need your medicine? Did something h…"

"I'm by myself…Come home now!" Jack was becoming more and more hesitant to answer. This voice sounded nothing like the owner, and this voice created even more guilt than the previous. "Come home!" It repeated again. "Come home." Sitting with the phone cord wrapped around his fingers, Jack couldn't keep himself on one mind. The desperate voice was calling out to him again, but that same voice had pushed him away hours before and would manipulate him as soon as the door was open again. _What do I do?_

The chain on Jack's necklace began lifting backwards until his head hit the edge of the bed and looked straight into the hard eyes of Nicol. One of his soft hands held the phone up to Jack's ear and just waited. Jack caught the cross on his necklace and spoke quickly so he could catch his breath. "Roger…Roger! I can't come home. I just finished my appointment and the doctor said I needed to rest in a nice, warm place. The stress of this whole thing has been too much, so you need to handle yourself with Angela. It's not the first time you've taken over, so I'm sure it won't be a problem…Roger, don't say that…This isn't about Ralph! It's…" _It's up to me to start this…_

Sucking in air, Jack let out a small cough, clearing his throat quickly to end the conversation before his voice died out. "I'll be back in a few days. Don't come here, please. You want me alive, then let me get better." The room was silent for a moment, but Nicol could pick up a few loud yells from the other side of the phone before Jack slowly hung up, keeping his head down. "You are sure you want to do this? You're already hesitating," the thick accent beside him reminded. "I know, I know…"

"Knowing is not acting. You hesitate, you die." The added weight left Jack's bed side, turning to face the self pitying red head. "One last time. You want to go through with this?" The choir boy remained silence until he came face to face with those piercing eyes. The ice was creeping into his skin with that stare. He tried as hard as he could to freeze his own eyes as he responded, "I'm sure." Satisfied, Nicol slouched in the chair beside the bed and began speaking in a lighter tone.

"In that case, we have things to talk about. You just come back from your appointment?" Jack nodded, slightly drowsier than before. "How much time do you have?" Lifting an eyebrow, Nicol observed Jack sway slightly. His chair creaked as he lay down the even paler Jack who tried his hardest to pay attention once Nicol began again. "How much time?"

"He said I have about three more days." Jack mumbled, digging his face into his pillow. Nicol laughed to himself, putting his arms on his knees and hunching forward, his eyes still shooting towards Jack. "Can you even hold out that long?" No answer came, and the conversation moved on with Jack finally asking the question that had been bothering him for awhile. "Where exactly do you fit in?" This obviously excited Nicol, whose eyes finally burned with a little intensity.

"As I said before, I am your sacrifice. You aren't going to be around anymore, which means Roger has no distraction holding him back. With that, Ralph is dead. If I am there, things are different. As I said before, I am shadow." Waiting for him to finish, Jack lifted his eyebrow slightly. "Is that why you broke into my apartment?" He groaned as the dark haired boy beside him laughed again, holding out his hand. "I come for three reasons. Number one, I need any advice you can give me about Roger."

Jack flipped over, shutting his eyes at the exhausting thought of explaining the creature that was Roger. "Number two, I was told to tell you that you need to get in touch with Ralph." The tall form was now looming over Jack's curled up body. "You'd better get moving Romeo if we need Juliet to cooperate."

"Please don't put it like that," the ill listener begged as he turned his body to face the last number. To his surprise, Nicol was lifting his shirt over his head, revealing a slightly scarred body. "Number three," his deep voice said through the shirt's fabric. When the shirt finally hit the floor, Jack found the shadow casting over his body. "What is number three?" He questioned through tense lips.

"Number three. You need to teach me what I need to know," the voice stated surprisingly calm. Jack stared wide eyes as the masculine body began to press against his, tilting his head. Finally, he shattered his shock and pushed himself up. "What do you mean?! This isn't what I meant by helping me! You just told me to go after Jul…Ralph, and now you want me to sleep with you?! I am not getting in bed with you!" This time, it was Nicol who was wide eyed. He blinked in disbelief, scratching his head in utter confusion. "If Roger is into this, shouldn't I be prepared if I'm going to replace you? You give me impression that he does this sort of thing. You also gave me impression that he hurts you, and this is one situation where I'd like no pain. Does that not make sense?"

Jack attempted to push off the newly aggressive ally, who obliged immediately, still not understanding why Jack was so hesitant. "You don't just give yourself away like that. You're too young," the choir boy scolded softly, reaching over the bed to retrieve the thrown shirt. "This is your first lesson about Roger. If you act a certain way, he won't force himself on you. Then again, you're probably more of a mystery than I am, so you might have to fight off his natural instinct more than I have." Jack looked up and immediately turned his eyes back down as he saw the very mysterious smile he'd mentioned. "Please don't tell me you're getting excited about this…"

"What can I say? I like challenge. He sounds easy enough to understand. Anything else you'd like to tell me?" Jack immediately jumped on the question. "Don't think of him as simple. That's what got me into my situation in the first place. He can play the part of an innocent boy really well, but he's extremely manipulative and sadistic." Pulling down his shirt slightly, Jack revealed the healing puncture wounds that were made in the room earlier. "He's a modern carnivore, but his mind works like a genius. That's why you always need to watch him, that's why you need to go along with what he says. He really is a beast and he really is a psychopath, that's why you need to fear him…" Jack let out a deep breath as he finished, finally putting off a little of the burden on his chest.

Seeing as though Nicol had begun a silent reflection, Jack reached into his bedside drawer, pulling out a lighter and a carton. He sighed grudgingly and held out a cigarette. "There is one thing I can teach you to do. It's only an appearance thing." As Jack stumbled towards the window, Nicol turned over the carton, shaking his head. "You just cannot win today. I already know how to smoke. Come on, I'm just as old as you." Lighting up, Nicol stood beside Jack, who had leaned out the window. "I really don't understand you, Nicol. The first time we were around each other, you were so quiet and shy. I know you're a shadow, but you have to have a personality."

Smoke rose in ribbon like swirls. The two silently watched the streets below, too stubborn to ask or answer anything. "I know you're hiding something," Jack started, wiping away the smoke that was blown in his direction. Obviously, his Russian ally was not the open book he was previously perceived to be, but he still wasn't satisfied. "Listen, I'm not saying that I don't trust you, but if we're investing in the same struggle, than I think I'm entitled to something." When the two grey eyes across from him began building up the stone heavy stare again, Jack simply threw his hands up and shrugged. "I've said in the name of God that I would not judge, and I won't judge you."

"Please, just tell me a little bit. Besides, what harm could it do if you'll barely ever see me?" Jack finished with an innocent smile, to which he received the same dark laughter, though it was a little bit more enjoyable this time. Nicol folded his arms against the windowpane, covering his laughter until he could regain his composure. "I didn't think you could, but you win me over. The preaching needs to stop though, but I tell you small things."

After taking a deep inhalation, Nicol dropped his head onto his hand. "Born in Russia, small details not important. Father worked in government and mother stayed home with my brother and me. My father always love old home, but things keep getting worse. My father also love Lenin, but those times were over. So was my father. Government doesn't want people of the past, and that was my father. One day, he leaves, never comes home. It was now up to me to fend for my family. My mother was beside herself."

Jack began playing with the chain on his cross, listening in awe. Nicol stopped for a moment and rubbed his eyelids, trying to remember. "We sell just about everything, but it was okay because we were alive. But food becomes short, and my mother was sick, in more than one way. She could not think straight, she wasn't a person anymore. My brother's life, she tried to sell for food. She lied to me and started dragging him across bridge. I hear little brother crying, and I made my choice." Another inhalation of smoke.

"What choice did you make?" Jack asked, fully absorbed by the sad tale. Nicol laughed a little at his wonder, turned to face him. "I kill my mother. Well, I don't know if she's dead. At that time, I didn't care. I take my little brother's hand and push her off bridge. I hear her crying and screaming, but I just run. She could be alive, but we'll never see each other again, that is true. Lucky for me that I was smart back then. I can understand war…so I bargain to get my brother to Switzerland. He was good boy, and he still is. He never changed."

"Why didn't you just go with him? You had a way out." Nicol simply shook his head. "It's not so simple. People know my family, people always know. I stay behind so they have someone to recruit instead of my brother. I learn to smoke from the men I fight with, just to let you know. Honestly, I can hardly remember. I don't even know how long I was there. All I know is I was captured. They put us on a train to who knows where." The end of the cigarette. Another one was lighted quickly, and Jack watched as the pain of the past continued to grow in Nicol's face, which held a cool front.

"Do you know where you ended up?" "Germany, like most anyone you'll hear about. Like I said, I don't really remember. All I know is I was there." As he slowly finished the last sentence, his arm reached up to Jack, who curiously watched the arm turn over, revealing a set of numbers on his wrist. "I play instruments, I like cold, but what more can you say for Russian boy like me? I didn't understand what was said to me, but I know physical language. I know I am lucky to be alive…Please don't ask anymore about that part of my life. I'm still trying to deny it to myself…"

Jack immediately agreed, and the story moved on to its close. "It felt like forever, but finally, I was allowed to live again. I immediately went to find my brother in Switzerland. The ride there was so painful. All I could think about was how lonely he was and I hoped that he had lived. I needed to know I did something for someone. I felt I failed my country and my parents. All I had left was my brother. I was nervous that he would reject me for leaving him, but he couldn't have been happier to see me. He's all I have left of my old life. Him and the little we saved of our home."

"What did you save?" Jack asked, unaware of the fact that his voice was getting softer. He put more of his weight against the window's edge to keep balance, hoping his draining strength was unnoticeable. The grey eyes that glanced beneath dark locks were obviously wiser, though no words were spoken on the subject. "Little things here and there. I don't want to drag on the list. We had to sell most of our valuables, but my little brother kept a few rings of my father's. The beryl one was always his favorite. He idolized our father, so it's probably what kept him going while I was gone. Me? I kept my mother's jade necklace."

His thumb pulled against the chain revealing a green dragon from underneath his shirt. "We saved a few other collectables from the Orient, but this one is the only one I'll ever wear. It was a good thing I gave it to my brother before he left, otherwise, I would have lost it for sure. Anyway, my brother and I didn't have any way of making ends meet, and the family that had kept my brother was suffering on their own debts, so we were shipped here to an orphanage. My brother was scared of that idea from the start, and I knew it wouldn't work. There was too much of a risk of separation, and that wasn't an option for us. As soon as we got here, I looked for work.

Nicol peered down at the jade, moving it into the light slightly. "My mother gave me luck with this necklace. While I was looking, I passed by Sage's flower shop and for some reason, which I still don't know now; he wanted me to work for him. Now I have enough money to take care of my brother and myself."

Letting out one final breath of smoke, Nicol put his hands on the top of the window, turning the rest of his body to the silent listener. "From this, I learn to be a shadow, but that doesn't mean I don't have compassion for your situation. Sage told me all about you, and I do sympathize. I help you because I want to, and hopefully we understand each other now. I understand if you don't trust or dislike me, because in your shoes, I might too, but I'm just letting you know, I'm on your side. Okay?"

The window shut and Nicol returned the lighter and box of cigarettes to their original home. Jack had only moved slightly, still supported by the wall. He eventually trudged in front of Nicol, his head bowed low. "I'm sorry…Oh God I'm sorry." Before Nicol could interject, Jack had already begun falling over. His head rubbed against Nicol's tensing stomach before he was shifted towards the bed. "You need to learn when to stop. If you plan on having everything ready in three days, you'd better not push yourself."

Jack only continued to mumble apologies as he was placed under his soft blankets, still with traces of blonde hair hiding in the stitches. "I need to go see Sage now, so you just need to focus on waking up in the morning. Don't do anything bad anymore. You still have things to do," the cool voice spoke while heading towards the door. Just as the shadow was about to disappear, the weak form in the bed called out. "Did you give up on God then?" The red hair disappeared beneath the blankets as the same deep laugh denied him. "I told you before. I don't believe in gods. If we're gonna do this, we're doing it ourselves." Jack was finally alone.

He kept his eyes closed to keep the room from spinning, but his head was still bursting. He pressed his hand to his head in fear that his thoughts would split his head in two. "Three days, just three days? I couldn't even keep a fire going for three days…" Unable to keep his eyes open any longer, Jack finally let himself fall asleep, not noticing the small note on his table. The spider like cursive simply read, _"Looks like I got you in bed after all. Have fun tomorrow, and don't forget your bible."_

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Author's Note: This chapter actually turned out better than I thought it would, and I'm relieved that I finally got Nicol's past out now. I like how his character is turning out so far, and he's only going to develop more. He's so cool! YAY! I'm somewhat surprised at how I wrote in the relationship between Jack and Nicol. I'm almost wondering what I'm going to do in the future! Hopefully, I'll update soon, with a chapter finally with Ralph! Thanks for reading!


	14. Chapter Thirteen

Author's Note: WOW! It feels like forever since I've written. I hopefully will find some inspiration this summer for some new chapters! UGH! I'm still getting out of the icky style I was going into during my creative writing class. I will try to get back on track!

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**Chapter Thirteen**

"_HELP ME! HELP ME!" Ralph's feet dashed between flames, his entire body burning with fear. He rushed through the dream he'd had almost every night, painfully aware of his surroundings. For some reason, this dream wasn't ending. He'd already run past the last trees and he could already see the ocean and hear the screaming. "WHY WON'T I WAKE UP?!" His eyes opened to the arms of a soldier with a tense jaw. "Are you alright?"_

_Ralph tried to speak but his body moved itself as if he was following a scripted scene. As he turned, the sand flew into the air with the rough feet of warrior boys armed and ready. They poured like ants out of the trees, raising their spears and screaming for Ralph. He hid his face within the warmth of the protective navy coat while he heard a soldier scream what he'd repeated in his head so many times before. "Boys, please calm down. We're only here to help you. Just come with us, and you'll be alright." "No no no no no…" _

_Each boy must have seen something in that man that reminded them of home and Ralph could hear the clang of their weapons hit the sand. His eyes widened as he attempted to cover his ears, forced to turn around again. "No more…" "NO! Don't defend that traitor! Let me kill him now! NOW!" The much leaner Roger had his spear raised and Ralph could almost see the animalistic gleam in his eyes. His blood froze cold at the sight and thought of the growling boy, even if it was a dream. "Wake up…wake up…" Unable to snap himself out of the nightmare, cries filled Ralph's ears. "GIVE HIM TO ME NOW!"_

_Roger's thunderous yells spread the carnivorous instinct within the boys who now rushed with dry eyes towards Ralph and his saviors. The beat of their feet was too loud, the ocean's waves crashed too hard, the air was too thick, and the fire was too hot. It was all too much, even in a dream! "STOP IT!"_

"_STOP RIGHT THERE!" Still unable to wake himself, Ralph felt a sweep of nausea pass over him as he watched Roger speed past the other boys, closing in the distance. His eyes were filled with rage and stared right into Ralph's. Behind him, Ralph could hear a fast click and a soldier's scream. Then…Jack…"ROGER! ROG…" Palm trees cracked and smashed into the ground, rumbling the island as Roger slipped to the ground slowly in a circle of fire like liquid. Ralph could feel gravity pushing him down as his eyes rolled back. "Finally," he thought, "finally out of this nightmare…" He fell below the water, eyes wide open._

"_Hey Ralph, what are you doing?" Ralph could feel the flow of the water beneath him and a hand slightly tapping his chest. The voice was gentle and quiet, so motherly and far away. "S…Simon!" Ralph's eyes opened to the island, completely silent and covered with tropical flowers. He'd never seen it like this before, but it was more beautiful than ever. His fingers pushed up into the sand as he looked at the smiling boy sitting cross legged beside him. "Hi Ralph," Simon said bashfully. Ralph could feel tears building in his eyes. "SIMON!"_

_He felt the warmth of Simon's fragile skin as he hurried to wrap his arms around him. It was hard to believe he could even do that! "What are you crying about Ralph?" Simon rubbed his back, listening to Ralph's sobs. "S…Simon!" He was too surprised to ask any of the questions he'd kept in his mind for the past five years. All he could do was lie in those soft arms and catch the scent of island flowers and the ocean breeze. "Ralph, you're not happy…" Ralph remained still for another moment, eventually pulling back and hurrying to rub his eyes._

_Simon's light eyes stared while he listened, just as wide and sad as always. "What are you talking about? Of course I'm happy. I have a girlfriend and school…and there's J…" Ralph put his hand over his mouth before he could finish. Why would that name even come to mind? Simon folded his hands, smiling. "What about Jack?"  
_

"_I…I never said anything about Jack!" Ralph protested, rubbing the back of his neck as the warmth of his lovebite began radiating again. "Come on Ralph, it's just me. There's no one else here," Simon whispered with another sheepish smile, holding his hair against his face as the wind blew. Ralph stared for a moment, remembering the quiet wisdom of the thin boy. What couldn't he say? "How did you know…?" He sighed, rubbing his burning cheeks._

"_You told me, remember? I know everything you've told me. Everything from the past five years. It's okay." Simon sat, waiting for Ralph to speak. Ralph, who could feel the eyes upon him, just sat and blushed for several minutes. He hadn't been able to figure it out himself. "You really want me to say it for you?" Simon scooted closer and sighed. "You need to listen a little better Ralph. You're thinking a lot when you really don't need to. Nobody is on the island anymore. We don't have to think for everyone. You can be a little bit selfish." Simon said this so plainly, Ralph felt even stupider for denying it. He knew it, but couldn't act on it…_

"_How would you know Simon? You haven't been here for the past five years! You haven't heard all the stories I've just been told! Jack and Roger killed you! THEY KILLED YOU!" The frustration from Simon's puzzling words pounded Ralph's head, watering his eyes. Simon hadn't protested, he just listening quietly, still smiling. "Simon, you're dead! How could you possibly know?!"_

"_Because I'm still listening Ralph. I always listened." "Simon, you're dead! DEAD! YOU'RE DEAD!" Though Ralph's voice was raising, Simon remained seated in the sand, his hands still folded neatly. "Ralph, you died long before I did. The truth hurts, I know that, but it's for the best. Let go of Piggy, let go of the island…let go of me too. There's still someone breathing in your world. His heart is beating for you, and yours may be too. You don't have to be dead Ralph, I know that for sure."_

"_Simon…" Ralph stretched his hand out, letting the tears flow freely now. Simon, who seemed slightly paler now, took Ralph's hand, nodding. Ralph could feel his cross growing warm and it began to rise as if a gust of wind was playing with it. "Ralph," Simon began again. Before he could finish, a buzzing sound drowned out his calming voice. Ralph rubbed his eyes, trying to grab Simon's shoulders. He gasped as he pulled back a bloody hand. Simon had begun falling every which way, pouring out blood as holes and bitemarks began reappearing on his weak body. "Ralph…" The flower petals that had decorated the island began flying with an upturn in the wind, while ashes showered onto the now lit sand. Ralph covered his eyes, crying out as loud as he could as the images seemed to fade away. "SIMON! SIMON!" "Ralph…"_

Ralph flew from under his bed sheets, his forehead hitting in the center of an unfamiliar hand. His eyes, wide with terror, gazed at an unrecognizable face wearing sunglasses. "Good morning," the boy, completely unaffected by Ralph's fear, said.

"How…How did you get in here?" Ralph whispered, his throat sore.

"I picked the lock."

"Wh…Where are Sam and Eric?"

The boy decided not to answer and stood up to stretch. Ralph bit his lip as he learned the boy's height. _He's even taller than Jack…_He felt his forehead, trying to make sure he was still awake. The boy was well dressed. He wore a black tie and a matching black vest. His white buttoned shirt sleeves were rolled up and his shoes were off, making Ralph worry even more. _How long has he been here..?_ "HEY! I asked where Sam and Eric were!" He nervously sank into the sheets as the boy turned and laughed. "In the closet."

Ralph began crawling out of his bed, not finding the joke funny. _This guy is trouble…_ The boy noticed the sudden mood change and shifted closer towards the bed, smiling coolly. Ralph narrowed his eyes, taking one last deep breath. _If I can just pin him down…_

Finding his footing, Ralph lunged forward, his legs pushing towards the sunglasses. To his surprise, the boy simply reached out his arms and caught him, laughing deeply as he spoke. "You're very light, aren't you Princess?" "P…Princess?! WHA…" Ralph could feel his cheeks burning as a hand extended his leg. "He describes you well. Very leggy." "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING A…" "Nicol…please don't upset him…" Ralph immediately stopped speaking at the sound of that familiar voice.

The tall boy sighed and began walking over to Sam and Eric's bunk bed, putting Ralph down beside it. Peering into the bed's shade, Ralph gasped as he saw Jack lying on the bottom bunk. Even though it seemed impossible, his skin was paler than its usual ivory hue and it looked to be dripping with sweat heavily. His eyelids were dark and ringed as if he hadn't slept in days and his pupils were as large as marbles. As he saw Ralph, he gave a faint smile, attempting to reach towards him with an unsteady hand. "Ralph…"

Ralph sat on his knees, staring at what he couldn't believe was Jack. It had been two days since they had last seen each other, and Jack looked sick then, but now he barely looked like he could walk. He shut his eyes as two clammy hands held the sides of his face and a husky voice spoke to the boy watching them. "Can we have a minute?"

The boy clenched his jaw, leaning forward towards Jack so only he could hear what he was saying. "If you feel worse, we leave. We have more to do, okay?" Jack gave another weak smile and nodded. "I'll try my best."

"Don't try. Just do it," Nicol warned, tapping his fingers lightly on Jack's forehead before turning around. Ralph glared as the tall boy bent down, lowering his shades. The chill of his nonchalant grey eyes stung at Ralph. His hand grasped the young face glaring at him, speaking slowly into Ralph's ear. "Don't do anything stupid…See you later," the cool voice whispered in a fierce tone. Waiting until the door shut, Ralph turned wide eyed to Jack. "Why would you hang out with a guy like that?!"

"He's not that bad. He just…shows his feelings diff..."

"Who was that guy?! And just who does he think he is grabbing me like that! AND CALLING ME PRINCESS?!"

"Ralph…Ralph!" Jack watched as Ralph began pacing the room, his face flushing in anger and embarrassment. He thought of the sarcastic tone and cool expression…and that awful hand! _And why was he with Jack?!_ "What a bloody…" "RALPH!"

Ralph stopped his raging once he noticed how weak Jack seemed to become just from yelling. He hurried back to the bedside, scratching his head. Before he could apologize, Jack interjected, getting straight to the purpose of his visit. "Do you remember what I told you in the hospital?" Ralph immediately turned red again. "Yeah, so?" "You never answered my question…"

"Jack, I told you I don't love…"

"That's not what I asked you!"

"Oh…well, I guess I don't remember…"

Jack shut his eyes, struggling to breathe against the effort and slight disappointment of Ralph's response. Lines of sweat raced down his cheek as he attempted to open his mouth again. Instead, he rubbed a hand over his eyes, searching for the right words. Ralph could feel the distance between them, even though Jack was right beside him. The sound of the sickly breaths made him want to hold his ears as hard as he could. "Ralph," Jack groaned, struggling for several minutes to push himself against the small wall space beside the bunk bed. Ralph could see Jack's clothes soaking, clinging wetly to his body. "If you won't answer me that, can you at least explain what you're thinking right now?"

Ralph ran a hand through his hair, standing again. "I'm thinking a lot of things right now. What kind of question is that?" He walked to the window, pressing his hands against the sill. _Calm down, calm down…_

"If you just tell me something…anything, then I'll leave you alone. Is that well enough?" Jack whispered, aching as he turned his head towards the stubborn blonde. "I'm thinking…I'm confused and it's your fault." "My fault?"

"Yeah. After we got off the ship leaving the island, I was fine. Sure, there was the court case and all, but…" Ralph bit his fingernail and trailed off until Jack asked him to finish. "But what?"

"Nothing. I was just fine. I mean, I guess I want to know…" Their eyes connected for the first time. "Why did you wait until now to come into my life? It's been five bloody years and I have a girlfriend, I have a religion…I was SURE that everything in my life was under control. Then you come back in and everything just falls apart. People are apparently threatening my life," Ralph began, pacing the room and counting on his fingers. "You're working with Roger, you're acting like a Christian, you smoke, you sing, you play violin! You said all those things to me…and we…"

He began stuttering as he always did when they brought up that incident. The very thought of their bodies so close, so confused still left his mind blank. "Ralph, we…" "DON'T SAY IT!" His bangs slightly brushed his face as his hands came down upon the table. "Please don't remind me anymore! I don't understand it, and I don't understand you, Jack! You shouldn't have done that! WE shouldn't have done that! I'm confused enough as it is, and now you…you make me act against the lord…"

"Act against the lord?" Jack repeated. "Ralph, you can't believe…" "Jack! Be realistic! How many bloody boys do you know who can say they've slept with another? I don't understand how you can be so calm in this situation!" "Because I like you…"

"Who cares?! I liked you before any of this started! So…" Ralph covered his mouth in awe at his own words. He could feel his eyes watering. _Damn it!_ Through his misty eyesight, he could see Jack struggling to stand, a smile of relief on his face. He drew closer, using the weight of the table to keep him stable as his hands touched Ralph's cheeks. "That's the only answer I needed. As long as you're willing to give me a chance or even…just help me in my situation...That's fine. I'm satisfied if you're around, so I know you're not dead…and neither am I." "D…Dead…"

Ralph's light eyes glazed over at the dream he'd had about Simon. "Ralph?" Jack turned his face over in his hands as the expression drained away with the blood in his face. "RALPH?!" "You…you tricked…me…You killed Simon…I can't…I can't…" Ralph had said too much and Jack had told him too many things. And that dream…All the questions and mysteries they were speaking on now were rushing to his head as his blood seemed to rush to his feet. _Simon…_

By the time Jack was able to get Ralph onto his bed, he was crying, but aware. "You killed Simon," he muttered with his head down. "We all killed Simon…" Jack added.

"I never hurt him…never…" Ralph ignored the weight as Jack sat on the bed, trying to look him in the eye. "He's probably hurting now if he's seeing you like this…Ralph, you look so exhausted. Your fever hasn't left either. I shouldn't be here. I'll come back tomorrow, you just rest." Ralph, who had not yet looked at Jack, clenched his teeth as he could hear Jack's rough breathing. _He sounds horrible._

Jack dragged himself up, slowly stepping towards the door with a stone in his stomach. _I don't have enough time…_"Ralph…even if you don't see me for awhile; I still care about you…" Just as he reached the door, two hands pressed into his back. He could hear quiet sobs before the door began opening. "Jack…please…don't ever come back here." "But Ralph…" "NO! I can't think straight! There's too much going on! Just lea…" Ralph's eyes widened as Jack's weight pressed him into the wall. Jack's lips were able to silence him for only a moment, as neither of them were well enough to hold their breath.

"I know Ralph. I'll leave you alone. Just please, even if you care about me just a little bit…find me before it's too late. Okay?" Red locks traced over the wet streams falling down Ralph's face as he swallowed, nodding and sobbing at the same time. As soon as the weight left him, he hurried to bury himself in his deep blankets, sick with confusion and fever. _What am I supposed to do?! _ The door shut, leaving behind two books, one with a familiar address written on the paper just long enough for Ralph to see.

"Jack? Jack?! JACK!" Jack shook his head, wincing at the pain that welcomed him to consciousness. "What happened?" He peered up to see a hint of worry in the grey eyes of Nicol. "You passed out. I tried waking you up for ten minutes maybe. I told you this was bad idea." Jack sat up from the pillow of his friend's knees, thinking for a moment before wiping his face. "No, I think...something I did in there was right. Either way, it's Ralph's choice now, not mine. Let's go back." "Are you su…?

"I'm fine Nicol!" The pale boy reassured as he inched up the wall until he was finally on his feet. He ignored the footsteps following him and the voice that kept calling his name. He was too preoccupied with the thought of Ralph. _I didn't have enough time to tell him everything…what happens next is all depending on him tomorrow…_

Nicol extended his arm around Jack's shoulder, interrupting his thought. "Did you ever think you were trusting the wrong person? I really don't know about that one…He has attitude…" "Nicol, don't worry about it." Jack paused, trying to hide the fact that he couldn't see straight in front of him. "D…Don't worry about it. Ralph always made the right decision. I'll see him t…tomorr…" "JACK!"

Nicol caught Jack's sinking shoulders, turning him around. His eyes were still extremely dilated, but seemed to be ready to escape into his head at any moment. _Sage was right…_The strong boy put Jack over one shoulder and took off as fast as he could. _Just one more day, Jack! Just one more day!_

_--_

Author's Note: I forgot to mention before, but flashbacks are italics. I'm a little relieved I finally let Ralph get angry. He's going to be more frequent, though the chapter ends with Jack and Nicol. The next few chapters are going to be leading up to more action and such. I'm exhausted. Darn creative writing class! : P


	15. Chapter Fourteen

Author's Note: WOW! I haven't been writing for awhile. Just don't know where to pick up since I've been away from it so long. Trust me, every time someone reviewed or even added the story to an alert list, I felt a need to try and write again. Since angsty boy love can only go on for so long, I hope that once the "plan" goes through, there will be more action. In future chapters, I really want to use Roger to his full extent. OH! And in this chapter, italics are used because the characters are heard, not seen.

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**Chapter Fourteen**

"_Is he dead?"_

"_No! Of course not! Just please hold the flashlight still…"_

"_Not directly on the face. Don't put near his eyes!"_

"_OH! Sorry! SORRY!"_

"_His eyes are dilating again. Put another cloth on his forehead."_

Jack could hear these three voices swimming in his head, and he tried calling out. _My voice…_Numbness kept away any pain, while heat covered his face.

"_What's he saying? Can you tell?"_

"_Don't worry, it's alright. He might not be able to speak for awhile."_

"_Can I hold his hand…or…talk to him?"  
"That's fine. Just stay here until we're back…We need to get medicine…"_

"_Don't open that door for anyone. Anyone…"_

Two pairs of footsteps left the room. Jack couldn't even open his eyes to look, but his weight on a feather like bed assured him he was back at Sage's shop. He knew the voices, but they were so far away. Suddenly, two small hands closed around Jack's.

"_Hi Jack, its Oliver. I will pray for you so much, so please don't die! Nicol would be so sad if you died and I would too! I was really happy that you were our friend. I don't have a lot of friends anywhere else…"_

Jack immediately recognized the small voice. He repeated the name over and over in his mind, but the words never reached his lips. The voice he heard was quivering, begging him to listen.

"_Sage said you would be going away soon. Please come back though! I want you to teach me more! And we had so much fun together! Re…remember when we…we got ice cream? I had so much fun and…and I don't want you to go away yet…I want a friend…"_

The two small hands shook and small wet drips began sliding down Jack's hand. This time, a small whisper came from the bed. "Its okay…" Peering into the dim candlelight, Oliver saw two haunting blue eyes looking straight at him. "JACK!" The small boy couldn't resist crawling on the bed and wrapped his arms around the limp body below him. "Are you okay?!"

"Of course. I told you so before. Don't worry…" Struggling, Jack eventually got his arms around the shaking boy, breathing deeply. "I'm just going to visit a friend like before."

"But…Nicol said people who talk like that are liars…You're going away forever, aren't you?"

"Why would I do that? I promise, just a short visit and I'll be back…"

The heat was returning quickly to his forehead, and suddenly, the words he spoke to the desperate eyes above him weren't words. Oliver rolled off, sitting cross legged next to Jack. His small hands once again held to Jack's. "It's okay, Nicol and Sage will be back soon and you can have some medicine. Then you can go see your friend." Oliver sighed as the faint reflection in Jack's eyes faded as he drifted back into unconsciousness.

"We're back Oliver!" Nicol called as he rushed up the stairs. He slowly opened the door, squinting into the candlelight. Creeping closer, he found Jack still unconscious with Oliver curled up under his arm.

"Is he still alive?" Sage whispered from behind, shutting the door quietly. Nicol reached out, touching the free arm hanging off the bedside. "Yes, but we have to go faster. We don't have time. We don't even know if that small blonde boy will even show up." The tall boy bent down and picked up his little brother, sighing as he walked towards the door. "With the rain lately, it would be impossible to move Jack without leaving some kind of traces."

"Yes, but he can't even move at this point. I'm afraid his body succumbed a little too early," Sage replied, leaning against the outside wall. He put his hand against his forehead, listening to Nicol's footsteps go further down the hall. _There's no way he'll make it unless he leaves now. _After calming down, he reentered the dark room, kneeling beside the bed. Jack was mumbling something incoherent, his eyes half open and his fingers twitching. "Jack, Jack!" Sage took hold of his hand lightly. _Please wake up…_

The constant dizziness kept flowing over in waves. Jack could feel his eyes open one moment, then find himself in complete darkness the next. He could see the light hair beside him gleaming in the candlelight, but he couldn't reach for help. _How long can I last like this…?_ Just before another heavy weight strained his eyes, a looming shadow appeared at the door, and the next thing Jack knew, he was sitting up, drenched in freezing water.

"NICOL! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Sage cried, avoiding the icy splash that hit the bed beside him.

"We're leaving. No more time to let him suffer here. By the time I'm back up here, he's up and ready to go. His clothes are wet, put him in mine. Simple. Go." Dropping the bucket on the floor, the dark figure left coolly.

The drips of water tensed every nerve on Jack's body, and he finally felt aware. He looked over at Sage, who was already half way out of the room. "Wa...wait," a choking voice stammered from the bed. Looking back, the older man saw Jack shaking heavily, his eyes darting back and forth. "Don't worry, I'll be right back…"

Sage entered Nicol's room, stepping over to the dresser hurriedly. His hands shook as he pulled out the drawers, pulling out the first pieces of clothing he could find. Occasionally, his hands would run across a letter or small piece of jewelry. The more he tried to move past them, the more they seemed to roll his way. _How can I do this to Nicol…? Putting him in danger this way. I'm so selfish…All of this for my brother…Is that why I'm doing this?_

Jack began tearing off his soaking clothes, his muscles stinging with every move. He noticed red creeping up his pale skin. _This is a disaster. _Leaning back, Jack rested his weak frame against the wooden headboard. He watched the small flame in the candle twirl around the wick, giving him a warm solace from his aching body. Each dancing spark flew into the air like a shooting star, disappearing in a flash. It felt like the first time Jack had ever seen a fire like this. His memory burned with wildfires, but this small life was more than enough to keep him alive for a few more moments.

Smiling to himself, Jack thought of Ralph. Just like that small flame, he was beautiful and inspiring, bright and vibrant! Still, Ralph was hard to hold, painful to touch. He was still the boy that Jack could not keep. A trembling hand reached for the golden cross that rested faithfully on Jack's heaving chest. He held it to his lips for a moment. _God, please give me one more chance. One more chance to repent for what I've done…to change my life. To leave that island behind forever. To be able to be myself, and be with Ralph... _His eyes shut, imagining their hair, golden and fiery like the flame of a candle, twisting together endlessly. For that brief moment, Jack felt at peace.

Sage crept to the doorway, making sure to step louder on the floor before he entered. "Are you ready to go?"

"…Yeah, I'm fine."

Helping Jack edge towards the bed, Sage gently rested the clothes beside him and exited, sitting against the wall outside of the doorway. For a few moments, the only sound was that of the fabrics brushing together and a few deep breathes as Jack struggled to stay focused. Sage kept his eyes on the floor, his hands pressing into his forehead as he thought to himself. He didn't notice the slow footsteps until they were right in front of him.

"Sorry, do you think you could tie my shoes for me? My hands won't stay steady," Jack whispered, half embarrassed and half smiling. Slowly, he shifted his legs in front of him, resting against the opposite wall.

Sage silently worked, never looking into the eyes that were watching him. After he started tying the laces, he quietly asked, "Are you sure about this?"

Jack answered immediately, "I can't turn back now. I've already made my decision. I put everyone through too much to back out now. I can't do that anymore. Even if everything works out, there's still a lot to do, but I'm seeing this through to the end." He noticed a smile on the older man's face, almost covered by his blonde hair. "Sage, I don't think you ever really answered me when I asked why you were doing all of this…"

"I'm selfish, that's all. No matter what you'd have asked of me, I would have done it. I had to do all this for Simon." Jack looked down, staring at the hands that remained firm as they tied his shoes.

"That's okay…I was doing this all for me in the beginning. And Nicol's doing this for himself too. As long as there are other reasons, right?"

"Right, but it's hard to be optimistic in this situation. You're leaving us and you may not come back. Your friend still hasn't arrived here either. Even if things DO work out, we have your other friend to deal with. I can already tell that Nicol is ready to take your place, but his personality is a bit…impulsive."

"I know, and that's why I asked. If you don't want to get involved, then just tell me. After this is over, things are only going to get worse," Jack said, his voice lowering as loud footsteps began up the stairs.

Helping Jack to his feet, Sage pulled him close for a moment, speaking in a low voice. "You can always come back here. We won't abandon you." "Sage…"

"TIMES UP!" The clunk of Nicol's boots hit the wooden floor, almost knocking Jack off his feet. "Nicol, don't be so…" "Sh! We're leaving now!" "But Jack can barely…"

Before Sage could even finish his sentence, Jack was over Nicol's shoulder and they were headed out the door. "If Oliver wakes up, tell him I'll be home later," he called over his shoulder. Giving a slight wave, Jack rested his head down for a moment as another swell of heat flew over his body. Even the cool night air filled with the scent of rain wasn't enough to keep him focused. He watched as Sage's blurry figure stood in the doorway, slowly disappearing into the melting portrait around him.

After watching Nicol sprint faster into the night, Sage looked both ways. The only sound was the sheets of rain beating against the windowpanes, but no footsteps. Sighing, the older man shut the door, walking back into the shop. His feet quietly moved up the stairs towards Oliver's room. Opening it, a dim lighting gleamed from the dresser beside the bed. Sage peered over the layers of quilted blankets to see the wavy locks of hair at the pillow. _Good, still asleep._

He continued to check all the rooms in the upstairs before journeying back into the shop. For a moment, he stood by the fogged window, again waiting for a pair of footsteps to show up. _Still nothing._ Pulling away from the window, he entered the long corridor he had shown Jack. As he approached the image of his brother, he froze. Sinking to the floor, Sage stared into Simon's haunting blue eyes.

"You must be so ashamed of me brother. Playing this children's game. I can't believe I didn't try to talk your friend out of this. Even if Jack survives the night, there's no way I can assure that he will heal. And Nicol has the blood to jump into a situation so quickly that he'll forget what he's doing. He's an intelligent boy, but he thrives on such violent feelings. Just like that boy, Roger."

Sage never dropped his eyes from the photograph, pausing for a moment as if waiting for some sort of response. The chill of Simon's eyes just pierced forward, nothing more.

"That boy is a demon. He has no religion. I've only seen him once, but he is dangerous. I remember sitting in that courtroom and hearing about all the blood and bone traces found on the island. And he just sat there laughing. His eyes were bloodshot, and I couldn't have left this country faster. Oh brother, I don't know what I can do for these boys. Jack has changed. He's grown so sensitive and desperate. When he was sleeping, he clung to his cross for dear life. I'm afraid something more will happen to him if he lets Roger control him…and Ralph, he's too young for all of this. I was told he was still in school and adjusted normally. We've thrown him into an awful position. I can't even predict if he'll come here…"

Another stop and more silence. The rapping of rain tapping on the glass above the garden could be heard through the halls, bouncing around like rubber balls. A few muffled bangs echoed from the distance, but Sage paid no mind. His contact was still frozen on the picture. "Roger has a deep hatred for Ralph. It was obvious at the trial. Jack has told me all about that boy's sadistic tendencies and his psychopathic nature. If we do succeed, he will come to kill us, I know that. Jack and Ralph cannot handle him alone, but Nicol can, and that terrifies me as well. I've raised him and Oliver, but Nicol was already self aware. He is good, but he's so willing to dive into danger…and of all of them, he's definitely most interested in Roger. So, what can I do?"

The muffled bangs grew loud enough for the blonde to jump up and run to the door. His heart beat faster for a moment, clenching his hand around the door in anticipation. After waiting another moment, he opened it. Standing there, drenched from head to toe, was Ralph. His arms clung tightly to each other, unable to stop his body from shaking like a leaf. Short strands of blonde hair lay in all directions. His black shoes were caked in mud, which had sprinkled itself across his body. Sage covered his mouth, wondering how long the boy had been there. Before he could ask, Ralph clenched his teeth and spoke, "I…Is…J…J…Jack here?"

"45 minutes, and we're finally here." Jack's eyes opened slowly as Nicol spoke. The tall boy was standing before the ominous warehouse with Jack, barely conscious, over his shoulder. "Aren't you tired?" Jack whispered as his feet reached the ground. Nicol showed no signs of fatigue, breathing calmly and staring straight ahead with his arms crossed. His grey eyes were the same color as the metal of the building, and just as cold and firm. Meanwhile, Jack was falling to pieces, breaking apart with each drop of rain.

After standing quietly for a few moments, Jack knew their time was up and slowly turned towards his silent friend. "Well, I guess I'll see you when I see you. I don't know how I'm supposed to thank you for what you're doing." Nicol still hadn't moved, but Jack continued, looking at the building as well. "I hope I wasn't too much trouble for you, but it's nice to be carried once in awhile." A small laugh came from beside him, and the two finally made eye contact. "Tell me again why you do all of this," the deep voice murmured quietly.

"Because I think I deserve to come out of life happy. I need to repent and I know I've been going about it the wrong way. I just want to fix it…and make sure that Ralph doesn't die because of what Roger and I started."

"Is your little friend really worth it?"

"Of course he is."

Nicol sighed, shaking his head. "You'd better come back soon. I might kill him."

"Nicol, if you could do me one favor, please don't upset Ralph. He can't take your abuse like I can."

Jack tried to hold in his laughter as Nicol gave a slight smile, shaking his head. The two seemed completely unaware of their current surroundings until a streak of lightning lit the sky. "Here, Sage told me to give you this. It broke earlier." The familiar jingle of the odd ear attachment that broke at the hospital fell into Jack's hands. "It has the last of what you need," Nicol added in a solemn tone.

"Alright then…and as long as we're exchanging jewelry, could you hold on to this for me?" For the first time since they'd met, Jack removed the worn out cross from his neck, pooling it into Nicol's hand. It was as cold and beaten as Jack appeared at that moment. Nicol's eyes seemed a little brighter at that moment, as if the rainy moment had washed away his exterior. He reached it over his head, letting it slid down before smiling and laughing again.

"I hope it doesn't burn me." His hands reached back further, unlocking the thin chain to the jade necklace he mentioned before. "Here, hold on to this. It's lucky…" Jack happily accepted it, hiding the dangling stone beneath his shirt.

"I'm surprised; this seems a little cliché for you Nicol. When I told you what I said to Ralph, you laughed." Brushing dark hair out of his face, Nicol gave another throaty laugh. "You can have some nice 'last moments'. And if you wear that, it'll be easier to identify your body," he whispered jokingly, his eyebrow raising. Before Jack could respond, another light streak washed against the ink black sky. "Time to go…"

Their bodies completely faced each other. "Well, how do you want to do this?" Jack asked, reaching out his arms with the last bit of energy he had. "Handshake, hug, prayer?" Shadow hid Nicol's face as he changed his expression. "Well...what?"

"Here." In one fast movement, Nicol had approached, his fist already flying towards Jack's face, driving into his cheekbone. Stunned, all Jack could say was, "What was that?!"

The grey in Nicol's eyes was solid again. "I'm not sappy. You can give that to Roger for me..." With that, he turned his back and began walking off into the darkness. The choir boy watched him go, but couldn't think of a thing to say. His throbbing cheek reminded him of the pain that had been dragging him down. _This is it…_

Jack winced as every one of his muscles burned when he dragged open the door, entering complete darkness. "R…Roger?" His body stayed against the wall as one hand walked slowly over to the nearest light switch. A short click came from the other side of the room and Jack immediately stopped. The floor echoed as a piece of metal fell against it, and another click was heard. Little pieces rang as they fell to the floor, and the same clicking followed. "Roger, what are you doing?" Jack hollered as he flashed on the lights, his eyes widening.

The lights bounced off a barrage of shining guns that lay strewn across the floor. Roger sat in the middle, his face covered by his hair, which was oddly dripping with water. His entire body was soaking as well, and a pool of water had bled out onto the floor. Jack took a few steps closer, carefully pushing some guns aside. The dark form paid no attention and continued robotically to load the hand guns beside him and slide them around the floor. Slowly, Jack began crouching towards the covered face, squinting his eyes as the room began to spin.

"You can't just sit around all day. Get up. Where's Angela?" Click. "Roger…Come on." Click. "Roger!"

Without turning his face, Roger lifted his tan arm, extending a bony finger towards his bed. Feeling a lump grow in his throat, Jack inched away from the unmoving boy, closing in on the lump beneath the covers. Click.

The bright lights hanging over the damp setting were slicing into Jack's eyes, but the room was growing darker. _Got to hang on. _The lump under the covers made no movement and Jack could feel his hand tremble as he reached for it. Click.

Shutting his eyes, Jack pulled back the sheet swiftly. For a moment, he held his breath. _What could he have done now?_ The sound of Roger still loading guns knocked against the walls. Click.

Finally opening his eyes, Jack saw only a black bag. The clicks in the background began echoing like a surreal clock. The zipper jingled as unsteady fingers pulled it down, revealing darkness. His hands slid into the bag without hesitation, wrapping around a round object and something warm. Click.

While attempting to swallow the lump in his throat, Jack brought his hands back into the light. His pale eyes found the round object to be a vial of grey powder and the warmth in his other hand came from another handgun. "Roger, what is this…?" Click.

The last click was closer. Slowly, Jack began turning around. A cold metal brushed against his bruised cheek, following his movements until he'd turned to face the gun completely. The demonic eyes that had been so listless lately were boiling into the misty color of Jack's. It was as if every single blood vessel had burst. As shaken as his breath was, Roger's dark voice was steady.

"Do you remember that conversation we had…?" His lips were curling back, revealing the feral fangs beneath them.

"We've had a lot of conversations," Jack replied calmly, shutting his eyes, still painfully dilated, from the glare of the gun.

"Remember when I asked you the difference between a psychopath and a sociopath?" A small squeak was revealing that Roger was about to fall off the edge into…

"Yes, I remember. Please, just put the gun down. We need to talk."

"No…No! I'm done talking! You've been gone for days on end and you expect me to talk to you?! Who do you think you are?!"

A bullet whizzed by Jack, whipping off a few strands of hair as it smashed through a window. "I was the only one who was ever there for you Jack, and this is how you repay me? You abandon me. Do you honestly think that your pathetic life is worth anything without my help? Who got you out of that hellhole? Me. Do you know how many people I had to pay off with my father's money just to get you into your school?"

Jack could feel his heart thumping in his ears as Roger's words rang clear as day against the fading background. He could hardly tell if he was even breathing, but the demonic voice that hissed at him resonated. "I've sacrificed everything so we could get revenge and then you do this. What does Ralph even mean to you? He'll just use you until you have nothing left to give, just like on the island!"

"And how are you any different?" The choir boy asked in a strangely loud tone. "You've been using me since day one. No matter how the plans worked out, I probably wouldn't have lived through them anyway."

"The difference is," Roger said in a cooler tone, his gun tapping the side of Jack's cheek, "I'm not afraid to admit that I'm using you. You used to be fine with that as long as your little sob story of redemption pulled through in the end. You would either turn up a martyr or some damn savior. Do you honestly think that any type of god would forgive you for all the blood you spilled?"

"Be quiet…"

"Now you want to stop? Jack, you were the one who stuck the first spear into that bloody Simon. You roasted the first pig and painted your face with the dirtiest of blood. And you think I'm wrong?"

Roger's black hair flew back as he laughed. The very heat of his presence felt like the opening to hell. The fierce intensity of the sociopath had crawled into the heart of the cool psychopath, and every part of his body was tense with hate.

Jack tried to keep firm eye contact with Roger, but constant pangs of illness were rocking him back and forth. The fight was dying out, but not dead yet. The laughter subsided, and Roger was closer to Jack's face.

"You just keep preaching, but sooner or later, you'll realize the situation you're in. The world hates you just as much as it hates me. Just like that entire courtroom hated us. The only way you'll ever live a decent life is through me. You can curse me until eternity, but it doesn't change a thing. We are still the same, you and me. The fact that your skin has lightened and you grew your hair back means nothing. My teeth are still sharp from all those pigs and their bones. My eyes are still bleeding from the sight of Ralph's face."

Roger paused for a moment, bearing his fangs again. "One way or another, someone is getting revenge. One way or another, one of us…one of the survivors of the island is going to die. It won't be me…It won't. I'm staying alive until the end no matter what I have to do. I've been keeping you alive since those days. You're either with me or against me. I saved you, but I can still kill you…Jack."

Jack remembered the heated metal in his hand, and his heart dropped for a moment. _Ralph hadn't come yet…_Before he knew what he was doing, Jack had shut his eyes and pulled the trigger. _Oh God…_

He could hear the splash of liquid hit the floor, gushing out nonstop. "Roger!" Opening his eyes, Jack realized he had shot the waterbed that had been behind Roger. A horrible laughter came below as Roger began rising up from the crouched position he had taken. "You lost the reaction to kill. What good are you that way?" Roger said with the grin returned to his face. "I even warmed the gun up for you."

Unable to believe what he was hearing, Jack had to break their connection. The malice in Roger's eyes could swallow him in a second. He still couldn't handle Roger alone. "Where's Angela?"

"Who?"

"Where's Angela?!"

The haunting laugh crawled around Jack's shoulders. "She's in your hand."

The water that leaked from the bed had begun to seep into their shoes, but to Jack, it felt as though his blood were draining. In one hand was a gun. In the other was a vial of grey. "What…What is this?"

"Come on Jack, you're a Christian! You of all people should know what ashes look like."

"You…you didn't. Your sister…I don't understand. Why would you do this?"

"We weren't getting along as well since you weren't around, you know?" Roger scratched his head with the end of his gun, pleased at the fact that Jack was literally withering before him.

"She'd been depressed lately. Something about her and Ralph. She said she felt "guilty." I called her a liar and we got into a fight. That's when I gave her the same choice I gave you. With me or against me. Guess how she answered."

Numbness. The cool of the water filling his shoes was carrying away his life. It was because Jack wasn't there. Whenever he took his eyes off of Roger, something always happened. "Don't worry about it Jack," Roger said as he leaned on Jack's shoulder, "She had it coming sooner or later. Just a girl."

"She was your sister!"

"A traitor is a traitor. Which reminds me, you still have a question of your own to answer. Are you with me or against me? Simple as that."

The end of the gun was massaging down the back of Jack's neck, bumping against the grooves of his spine. Once again, his heart felt as though it would tear out from his chest. It was beating against his entire body. His vision was almost completely gone and there was nothing to focus on. "What did you say?" Jack heard Roger say behind him. _Was I talking?_

The pressure on his forehead began increasing and the heat began flushing through his body. Jack's eyes dropped, realizing that his entire body was shivering, but he couldn't even feel it. His throat had dried out, and the sounds coming out of his mouth were unintelligible again. Roger simply watched, his dark eyes following every wrenching movement Jack made as he tried to move away. Jack clenched one hand around the other, pushing them into his pocket. "R…Roger…"

Roger stayed where he was, peering through the dark coils of hair as Jack stumbled into the puddle of water that had streamed across the floor. A small jingle rang as Roger saw Jack put his hand over his mouth. He coughed, clenching his fist tighter as he took a deep breath and turned around. Any color in his already pale face was gone and his lips were becoming as blue as his eyes.

For once, Roger seemed surprised. Stepping closer, he could see how wide Jack's pupils had gotten and how empty they looked. "Roger, I'm with you, okay? Don't…worry about it…Just you and me…" Reaching out his hand, Jack dropped something onto the floor before his eyes rolled backwards and he fell heavily onto the wet concrete. The fight was over.

The splash sprayed a few drops of water on Roger's face, but he didn't flinch. He dropped his arms, letting the gun fall to the floor with a loud crash. "I just…" His boots shuffled to the unmoving figure. Jack's red locks uncurled into the pool of water, almost as dark as blood. Moving a few strands of hair, Roger could see Jack's half open eyes, pupils almost as wide as bullets. His body was still jerking every few seconds as the last bit of warmth drained into the water. "Don't do this you idiot!" In the first desperate attempt he'd ever shown, Roger pulled Jack's head onto his knees and held his hand. "Don't abandon me!" His dark hair pressed into the empty chest. Nothing. With all the strength left in him, the panicked boy let out the most horrible howl, broken enough to shatter the hidden moon itself. _No!_

The only ones Roger's voice was reaching were the two shadowed figures waiting outside of the building in the rain. _Here we go…_ Click.

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Author's Note: Thanks for reading! I'm looking forward to finding time to write chapters with a lot more action.


	16. Chapter Fifteen

Author's Note: I hope that I can write a little more if I find free time, so I'm going to add a new chapter more recently than usual.

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**Chapter Fifteen**

Somewhere in Sage's dim flower shop, the clock was chiming. _What time is it…?_ Ralph lifted his weary head from the counter, pressing the towel on his head harder. A steaming cup of tea had been waiting for him for however long he'd been there, but he just silently hid his exhausted face. As soon as he'd stepped through the door, the tall blonde man on the other side pulled him in quickly and barely spoke a word. Ralph hardly minded and simply tried to sleep off the rest of his fever, repeating Jack's words in his head.

The man who pulled him inside politely served Ralph the tea beside him and pulled out the blankets that were covering his wet body, but now he seemed out of his mind. One minute, he would be sitting on the stairway facing the dark upstairs, and the next moment, he'd be at the window, his eyes scanning the dripping blackness. When the clock began ringing, the older man retreated from the window and walked out of Ralph's vision. Still, no word had been spoken about Jack. He could have asked his host, but the familiar air that man carried made it impossible for Ralph to even look into his eyes.

The chiming stopped just as the familiar face reentered the room, sitting on the stool beside Ralph. "How are you feeling?" His gentle voice asked.

"Why do people keep asking me that? I'm fine," Ralph began, pulling the towel away so their eyes could finally meet. Behind sandy hair were two soft blue eyes just like the expanding sky above the island. Unconsciously, Ralph began searching them for the familiarity he sensed before. The eyes he saw appeared to be stolen from someone. Behind an aged wisdom, deep into those dreamy eyes, was a vulnerable loneliness. A scared child in a deep shell. Just one gaze into that face made it obvious to Ralph, because the images were embedded in his mind.

This man's calm face was a mirror image of Simon's. Looking at it was just another reminder of what could have been. The delicate and depressed look on Simon's face could have bloomed brightly instead of dying away. All Ralph saw in his dreams was the young face that never grew up. His vision began fogging, but he just sat there staring into blue.

Sage sat patiently until Ralph looked like he would burst into tears. "I'm surprised. Out of the two of you, I would have expected you to react much louder than Jack did. I can cover my face if you like." Putting his hands over his face, Sage peered through his fingers to see Ralph pull a towel over his face to hide his half smile.

"I can't believe I didn't recognize you. You're one of the only people I can remember before that mess," Ralph sighed, looking through the towel.

"Well, we've all grown from childhood. Even though it's been five years since we've last seen each other, it seems as though everyone has lived an entire lifetime all over again. Have you talked to anyone since then?"

Waiting for a moment, Ralph responded slowly. "I go to school with Sam and Eric, but…I haven't talked to anyone else. Half of them, we aren't even allowed to because of…well, you know."

Sage nodded, noticing Ralph's eyes watching the rest of the room. "I've heard a few things, but they all seem to be readjusting rather well for the most part. Maybe you'll run into more of them eventually."

He was still smiling his wide grin despite Ralph's obvious suspicion. Jack still wasn't there, and there was no indication that he ever had been. The only reason Ralph came to the shop was because of the small piece of paper that fell out of one of the books Jack had left him. The small suspicion was slowly growing. Pulling his eyes away, Ralph looked down into the cup of tea, his fingers on the rim. "Are you alright?" Before Sage could move, Ralph put his hand out. "Can I just have a minute?"

As soon as the tall man excused himself, Ralph clenched the cup tighter, his eyes bulging. "What am I doing here? After the last conversation we had, how could Jack even want to be with me?" His mind recalled the last time they'd met, and the heat of their discussion. This whole time, Jack was begging Ralph for something so deep, but at the same time, was that what Jack really wanted? "He was talking about redemption…and Roger."

Ralph drew his hands into his hair, groaning in frustration. "How could I have been so blind? He never proved to me that he wasn't with Roger. I should have asked him to give me his word. They were together in the hospital after all." The more Ralph spoke to himself, the less reassured he felt. "I haven't seen Sage in years. Who knows what he's been doing since then. After the trial, there was no one he would have forgiven. Not after what we…they did to Simon."

The familiar feeling of terror washed over him. Every player in the game between five years ago and now scattered across a vast board. Ralph was blindfolded to their true intentions. As kind and gentle as Sage was, he could be anyone. Just as Jack could be anyone and Roger could be anyone. _Anyone…_

Another thought piled onto the mounding suspicion. "That boy…" Ralph couldn't forget the shadowy figure with the icy eyes that had accompanied Jack when they broke into his room. He could recall the thickness of the boy's accent, as well as his powerful arms that gripped Ralph's legs. With such a brooding look, no one like that could have good intentions.

Old instincts were pushing Ralph to his feet. Once again, he was trapped. He had no idea who to trust. _Why did I run here?_ Throwing the towel onto the floor, Ralph made a dash for the door. To his dismay, it flew open before he could even reach the other side of the room. Stepping from the rain was the mysterious boy from before. Even though it seemed that no inch of his body was dry, the tall figure stood confidently in the doorway, his shoes even muddier than Ralph's when he had entered.

A smile crawled onto the boy's face as his wet hair blocked eye contact. He dropped his hands, letting a large bag clutter to the floor. Ralph swallowed, trying to find the animalistic adrenaline he'd had a few moments ago. He waited for the boy to make another move, but after taking off his shoes and shutting the door, the boy stood still. "Hi," said the voice behind the wavy dark locks. Ralph couldn't find a word to say. _I'm finished…_

The boy began crossing the room, his feet shuffling along the floor. Ralph couldn't find the eyes behind all the hair, but the thick accented voice was directed at him. "I was waiting for you."

"What do you people want from me?" Ralph managed to ask, keeping still as the boy walked past him towards the refrigerator, pulling out a bag of ice. It felt like a wild animal taunting its prey, circling over and over before making a real move. After opening the bag, one of the boy's long arms extended out to Ralph, presenting an ice cube. "That's a nasty bruise there. Why not cool it off?"

Immediately, Ralph drew a hand to his neck. _It's still there…_Clenching his teeth, he took a step back. "I don't need anything from you. Just tell me where Jack is. I'd hoped I wouldn't have to see you again…"

His sudden bravery only excited the boy more. "I guess you didn't miss me much at all, huh Princess?"

"Don't call me that! Just tell me where Jack is!"

"You'll find out soon enough."

The boy began up the stairs, waving at Ralph to infuriate him further. Sure enough, before the boy had reached the top step, another pair of footsteps trailed right behind him. Ralph hung back at the top until the boy entered an open room and collapsed on the bed. An exhausted sigh followed and it was clear that he was not going to put up much more of a fight. Remaining cautious, Ralph inched towards the room, keeping his eyes forward. He only noticed Sage walking behind him when a hand touched his shoulder.

The only thing that kept Ralph from screaming was the amused look on the face of the boy in the room. "I'm sorry!" Sage apologized, immediately throwing his hands up. He continued to excuse himself as he walked around Ralph and helped lay the bag of ice across the boy's legs. They whispered to each other closely for a few moments before both of their attention turned to Ralph, who still had every body part clenched in preparation for an escape.

"I know this is all really sudden for you Ralph, but you're here for a reason," Sage began, looking for a seat for the young boy to sit in. "I'm getting a bit ahead of myself. You remember me, but I don't believe you and Nicol have been formally introduced…" Another mocking grin came from Nicol, and Ralph simply glanced over at him before turning back to Sage. "But what about Jack?"

Sage offered Ralph the empty chair by the edge of the bed, but he immediately declined. He couldn't drop his guard for a moment. These two had been making strange appearances ever since the hospital. Even though Ralph was apparently the center of the original conflict between Roger and Jack, these new faces seemed to know more than he did about the current situation. As soon as he mentioned Jack, Sage started speaking again.

"Jack is gone…well, he…he isn't here…I mean, he's…" The older man seemed to be thinking off of the top of his head and losing each word as he found another. Nicol stretched his arms across the headboard of the bed so he could eye Ralph.

"Jack went back to his friend. If he wouldn't have, you would probably be dying now." The nonchalant expression on the boy's face hadn't changed, but Ralph kept his gaze as Nicol continued.

"Because of your little meltdowns, Jack ended up running into us at the hospital. He told us the situation and how badly his friend Roger wanted you dead. Sage here seemed to be ready and willing to help, so we made a plan to keep you alive."

Sage regained his thought process and began speaking in a worried tone. "Jack was already willing to…throw his life away to make things better. He said that's what he'd been hoping to do for the past five years. I was afraid that if we didn't do something, he would have let Roger win…or…finish himself off…"

Ralph tried to ignore the nagging memory of Jack's constant desperation and the look of anguish deep within his eyes. He could almost feel the grip of Jack's pale hands kneading his skin and begging for forgiveness. The very thought of the hospital reminded Ralph of all the guilt he had tried to leave behind. "Come on, Jack's not like that. I know him. Yeah, he did some things in the past, but he wanted to live. He…was getting better."

Ralph lowered his head as Nicol clicked his tongue. "This is no time for you to rationalize your own mistake. You saw him at the hospital, didn't you? He didn't have time to bleed to death, so he let his own guilt and despair eat him from the inside out. The meeting in your apartment was no dream."

Seeing Ralph's anxiety growing, Sage attempted to interject. "It wasn't your fault! Nicol is just…exaggerating a bit. Either way, Jack's mental health was interfering with his physical health, but he refused any help other than my own…and I can only do so much. Even when he seemed to be growing a bit weaker, he was determined to at least halt Roger's plan."

Reaching into his pocket, Sage pulled out a crumpled piece of paper, extending it to Ralph. After waiting for him to reach for it, the older man noticed that Ralph couldn't even turn around.

"This is the last letter Jack received from Roger. By my advising, Jack cut off all other contact with Roger and stayed here once he began growing ill. He sent Roger letters using his old address and we used Nicol as an in between. He would mail Jack's letters and take Roger's letters from Jack's apartment. We always checked them for anything…dangerous, but Roger never sent anything more than words. To keep suspicion low, Jack pushed himself to destinations he'd written about in his letters…an alibi in case Roger actually contacted any of these places. Nicol often went in his place to make sure nothing went wrong."

"What about the letter?" Sage stopped immediately as Ralph questioned him in a grim tone. Hesitant to read the contents, Sage looked towards Nicol who jumped right into the discussion again.

"The letter was dated a few days before yesterday. Roger wanted to meet with Jack and find out what he wanted to do. Even if he didn't know exactly what was going on, that boy knew that Jack was reconsidering the idea of killing you. Today was the day they were supposed to meet and the day that was given to you on the piece of paper with this address. The only reason Jack came to see you once more was because he wanted to see you before he saw Roger and make sure he was doing the right thing."

"What did he say…?"

Nicol crossed his legs. "He chose you before he even walked through the door. To me, it's almost a shame, but that's what he wanted. By the time you'd finished your little discussion, he was barely able to walk and we knew our time was running out."

Jack could barely walk? How was that possible? Ralph knew he was sick, but Jack was able to lift him and hold him tightly against the wall in his apartment. All the information they were telling him felt like a whole different story.

"Jack left earlier to talk to Roger. He wanted us to wait up for you…in case you showed up," Sage added, biting his lip. He paused quickly and looked again to Nicol, who also seemed to be contemplating his word choice.

"W…Well, when is he coming back? Where is he?" Ralph didn't bother hiding his panic. Their hesitation added the final ounce of guilt and sunk him to his knees. He could feel his entire body quivering. "What happened to Jack?"

Pushing the ice off his feet, Nicol swung his legs around to the floor and stood, putting his arms around the chain at his neck. "See this?"

Ralph looked up to see Jack's golden cross hanging around Nicol's neck. "What does that mean? Is he..."

"Follow me and we'll see."

Holding the sides of his head, Ralph tried to keep himself composed. There were too many possibilities. Jack could be dead, he could be dying, or he could be wishing to see Ralph again. "Why couldn't I have come here earlier? I was unsure, but…I knew he was sick, I knew it."

"You're here now," Sage whispered, helping the shaking boy to his feet. As they reached the stairs, Nicol looked up from his shoes. His face remained blank, but the rest of his body was jumping with energy. Ralph could barely put on his jacket without leaning against Sage's shoulder.

"I should have answered him before. I never answered him!" Seeing the open door, Ralph noticed the pelting rain and thought of Jack trudging through it for him. "What can I do…What can I…?"

A swift slap interrupted Ralph as Nicol grabbed his arm tightly, staring straight into his face. "You can shut up, follow me, and apologize later." Before another word could even reach Ralph's lips, he was jerked out the door and into the foggy night. Sage stood in the doorway, looking to one side before shutting the door.

Lightning crashed against the clouds, giving Ralph a glimpse at the growing distance between himself and Nicol. The familiar sound of heavy footsteps and panicked breathing made his mind race. The streaks of light were just like the fire that rained down upon the island. Ralph could feel his body sinking deep into the mud as his mind began dragging him back. "Don't you dare!"

He felt the tight clench of Nicol's hand again and let himself be pulled farther. "This is no time for you to start losing your mind. I thought you had something more important to go after! Just hang on to me." The thick accented voice shouted against the storm.

The town felt blurred together like a dream. Only the gleam of yellow houses lit the way towards their destination. In utter desperation, Ralph was clinging to Nicol's free arm, feeling it move back and forth every few moments to keep them balanced. It was like being in the center of a tornado. If Ralph didn't hold on, he knew his mind would take him back to the island. He could just give up and collapse into a dream, but the arm coaxing him was too strong. "There."

Ralph tried to ignore his own heavy breathing and simply fall back against the first thing his back could find. He slid down onto the concrete, resting against a hard wall. Nicol's hand shot out to stop Ralph's head from slamming against it. "You really are delicate. What's the matter with you?" He asked as he bent his long legs down beside Ralph.

"I'm just really tired. You told me so much at once. I don't even know where I'm going…I don't even feel awake anymore." Turning his head, Ralph noticed Nicol loading a small hand gun and putting it in his shirt. "Remind me again why I trust you. You probably work for the mob."

Nicol's other hand pressed a gun into Ralph's chest. He fumbled with it, unable to even wrap his mind around firing it. "I knew it, you are a mobster! You've used a gun before!" He whispered in a panic. Lightning struck again, and for a moment, the grey eyes that focused on Ralph were completely alive. Nicol's entire body was tensed and ready to move. Standing, he leaned over the tired blonde, dripping water between their faces.

"If I recall, you've used a few bad methods in your glory days. You seem to be lapsing in and out of your consciousness enough to recognize what you're going up against. If you walk into a fight without a weapon, you won't walk out of the fight. Haven't you studied your own wars?"

Looking up at the dark face hovering over him, Ralph found no answer. All he saw was an enigma. That thick accent sounded just like that of a war veteran, but this boy was barely a year older than Jack. It was the look in his eyes, so relaxed yet so wild, which made Ralph stay still. He wanted to speak, but every time he thought of something to say, he mistakenly thought of Roger. The insanity wasn't there, but the desire for violence and pain was begging to break out. _Who is this guy, really?_

Just as Ralph began to find his footing, a piercing scream came from inside the warehouse. In no time, he recognized the bloodthirsty tone. There was a demon in there, and it was Roger. Holding his gun tightly, the young boy seemed to be prepared for the battle he'd never gotten to face on his own. He was so focused, he hadn't even realized his hands were shaking uncontrollably.

"Think about your island," the deep voice beside him said as a rough hand draped over Ralph's, "Think about the people you should have killed and the people you wanted to kill. Never put a gun in your hand without carrying the intention of shooting someone. The person in there is on a completely different level. All you need are bullets. Just go for the heart and the head. Easy, right?"

"How can you call killing someone easy?"

Nicol stood, groaning and walking in a small circle. "You and Jack really are alike. I've never met such naïve people in my lifetime."

Ralph was now standing straight, watching Nicol. "What do you know? You barely even know who we are! We went through hell on that island! Jack's still pulling himself off of his past! Why do you think I'm here right now?"

Ralph intended to point at the willowy boy, but forgot the gun was in his hand. Nicol stopped, turning to him. At that moment, Ralph felt right. The power was back in his hands. The cold metal of the gun was soothing to his worn fingers. He suddenly felt able to stand up to his companion.

"I don't know why you're here and I really don't care. I just want to get Jack and be on my way. I'm not here for your little mob mentality or your interest in Roger. Even if you liked Jack, I would never care enough about you to let you see it through. I should just let you walk in there right now."

"Keep your voice down…"

"No! I'm getting this out now so I don't have to see you again. For five years, I've had people blaming me for things I never did. I've been hounded by press and I've lost just about all of my friends. I came home with nothing! My mother was afraid of me and my father was gone. I suffered for five years to get back into this world! I'm even here after all that Jack has done to me! And out of all of this, you're surprised I can't put a goddamn bullet through someone else's head. I'm sorry I don't have that northern European bravery that you do. I've been through war and I've been through hell and I'm tired of all of this! Don't even put us on the same level of understanding. You don't seem to care about anything at all! You're barely even human!"

Before the next clap of thunder could follow a burst of lightning, Ralph's head slammed into the concrete wall and his mouth was forced open by a cold, wet metal. His light eyes peered into the darkness and several more bolts of light revealed the looming body of Nicol. The grey in his eyes seemed to be growing darker as they narrowed, looking directly into Ralph's. His body was trapping Ralph against the wall; one arm hung just above his blonde hair and the other held the gun that was propping open Ralph's mouth.

"Listen. While you and your little school friends were going through your emotional crises, I was fighting to defend your country and mine. Who the hell were you fighting for? I put a bullet through too many men to count, but it was because I wanted to see my brother survive. I wanted my people to pick themselves up. I wanted the world to wake up. I know what it feels like to lose a father, but I doubt you can comprehend the thought of seeing one dying. Or killing someone close to you. I haven't been to your hell, but I crawled out of the one you're hearing about in all the history books. I know fear and I know the feeling of life flowing away, one drop of blood at a time. You've been home for five years. I don't even know what home looks like. Mob mentalities…The people I fear are my own government. You want to die? I take you to Russia and introduce you to the KGB. You go try to find my father's grave and call him brave, see what happens. So when you say I'm barely human…"

Ralph's eyes dropped to the long fingers pulling back the end of the gun. The click echoed down into his stomach. _Here we go…He's gonna kill me…I'm gonna die._

"When you say I'm barely human, you make me want to prove to you how human I am. This northern European bravery you claim I have…I'll show you what it can do."

The rain seemed to stop falling around them and the noises all stopped. Was this really the person Jack had entrusted Ralph to? Every flash of lightning made him look more and more like Roger again. He could see the demons crawling around the grey eyes that held his gaze. Ralph shut his eyes as Nicol spoke again.

"You and Jack deserve each other. Between the two of you, you must be holding enough social disorders and anxieties for all of your old friends. The difference is he's begging and grasping for the forgiveness you think you already have. That island of yours was a paradise compared to what was going on in the world. Maybe it's time you faced that reality again."

Before Nicol could finish, another painful scream escaped the building. It rang against the metal and shook harder than the battling thunder. Ralph suddenly became aware of the rain again, shutting his eyes as he caught his breath. Unfazed, Nicol simply finished his statement. "The real world starts in there. It's your choice and your war to finish. What happens now depends on this very moment. Okay?"

Ralph finally closed his mouth, not making a sound. He could almost picture the gun to his head after the end of the dramatic speech, just like in the movies. _Oh god…_ "Okay," he responded, waiting for the blast. Nothing.

Opening his eyes, all that Ralph saw was the empty alley they were hiding in and the door to the building. The only possible help he had was gone. Ralph could barely tell if their conversation was real or not, but he knew the door he was reaching for was. "It's my choice," he said to himself quietly, holding onto the handle as another moan flew into the night. _Now or never. _Gripping his gun and saying one final prayer, Ralph pushed the door open and ran inside.

The room was a damp field of handguns that had been thrown every which way. Heavy lights overhead left no stop untouched, revealing a large trail of water that had drained from a bed in the middle of the room. Ralph scanned the water slowly, moving behind an empty crate as the sobs in the room got louder. Trying to recall the last spy movie he saw, Ralph nervously wrapped his hands around his gun and began moving towards another crate.

He lengthened his back along the heavy wood and peered around the side to get a better view. The trail of liquid he had followed before now had a visible end. Ralph's hands went limp as his eyes focused in on red locks glistening with drops of water. Although the body was being held tightly by another, Ralph immediately recognized the milky skin and long fingers that belonged to Jack. All the pink in his cheeks and lips had vanished, enough to make his freckles seem to disappear. His hair, which usually had a slight wave in it, was completely straight and made him look more delicate.

After a long look, Ralph began to recognize the thin figure that caressed Jack's limp body so tightly. _Roger..._ They hadn't met once since the trial five years ago, but Ralph immediately recognized him. His skin was still tan, and his arms and legs seemed to have grown like tree limbs. His hair, like Jack's, was longer and wavier, but Roger's was wild like a monster torn straight from a book. Though he couldn't see his face, Ralph could feel the anguish in Roger's pleas.

The room was silent for a moment and Roger tilted Jack's head upward, speaking softly. "What did you want me to do? I just wanted to end it. You said you would help and you promised you wouldn't abandon me. I really was trying to help you…I only wanted Ralph gone because of how much you seemed to be hurt. He wasn't with us in the institution…he didn't have to cheat and lie and steal to survive these past five years. But you…you still chose him over me."

Ralph shut his eyes again, trying to keep himself from breathing too loudly. He supported himself on the box again, hiding from view.

"How could you forgive him for all those times he hurt you? He was the one who sealed our fate five years ago in court. I was the one who saved you! If you were so upset about what I did to you, you should have told me. You were always so uncomfortable with me, but you kissed Ralph for ten minutes straight. How could you be so cruel when I cared about you too?"

Roger hid his face in Jack's chest and began crying again. Ralph looked down at the gun between his legs and shook his head. _How can I kill him if I feel sorry for him? _Grabbing his cross, Ralph shut his eyes for a moment and remembered Nicol's words again. _It's your choice._ Why couldn't this be simpler? Roger was supposed to be the enemy and Ralph was supposed to become the hero, but now it seemed like Ralph had hurt more people than anyone.

Picking up his gun, he stood and walked towards Roger. Immediately, his presence was detected, as Roger looked up quickly. His eyes were burning red and barely visible under his dark hair. _How am I supposed to say anything?_ Ralph stopped in the puddle and kneeled down in front of Roger, trying to remain calm as Jack's limp body was closer to his own. "Roger, what did you do?"

"Nothing! We were just talking and…he collapsed. I tried to save him, but there was no time. His pulse was gone in a few minutes." Ralph tried to reach out for them, but Roger held Jack tighter and prepared to move away. "What are you even doing here Ralph?" He asked in a weary voice.

"I'm here to help like I should have before. If I'd have known what you were going through, I would have from the very beginning. We haven't seen each other in over five years so there's no way either of us could have known anything about the other. I've heard things about you, but now I know they aren't true. So please, let me have Jack and we can go get you some help."

Roger must have been affected, as he gently laid Jack on the ground away from the puddle and looked back at Ralph who quietly reached out his hand and smiled. "Let's go get some help," Ralph said, sighing in relief. "Maybe you and Jack really do belong together," Roger whispered, squeezing Ralph's hand as they stood. He said something else in a lower voice, but Ralph couldn't make it out as they were carefully walking past the guns. "What Roger?"

The pressure on his hand was growing painful and Ralph turned back to look into two demonic eyes. "I said that I've never met such naïve people in my lifetime." Before he could react, Roger's long leg was in the air. It flew into Ralph's arm, crushing it against one of the metal poles in the room. There was barely enough time to feel the sharp pain surging through his arm before Roger had spun around and knocked Ralph into the sea of guns on the floor.

He dove for the nearest gun with his able arm, pointing it as Roger approached. "I'm not afraid to kill you!"

"The fact that you haven't already shot me shows that you are. Your right arm is basically useless and your only chance at winning a fight against me is a weapon." Roger smiled deviously as he continued walking slowly towards Ralph, his boots knocking other guns to the side.

Ralph attempted to pull the trigger, but his finger hesitated. He knew there was no way he could kill Roger, no matter how much he despised him.

"Come on Ralph, you've seen it done before," Roger spoke as he kneeled in front of him. "Do it just like that officer did on the island. Right here." Ralph shivered as Roger moved the arm with the gun to point at Roger's heart. "Right here."

For a moment, Ralph could only see the image of Roger's blood floating in mid air as his body hit the ground on the island. There was barely any time to react before the bullet knocked him out. Ralph had looked on in horror and even felt sympathy. Roger was a monster, but he was still a boy.

"You're right, I can't kill you," he murmured, dropping the gun. "But I know I can fight you."

"You fight me? You're serious?! Sure, you have boxing, but come on Ralph. Do you know how many countries I've traveled to and the number of bases I've been on? It wouldn't even be fair. You're willing to try thou…"

As soon as the invitation was accepted, Ralph connected a left hook to Roger's face. The skin was surprisingly soft, but freezing on contact. Already enjoying himself, Roger laughed and caught himself with his left hand, flipping backwards. _No way. _A few drops of blood hit the floor and Roger immediately charged forward, spinning around as he had before.

Remembering the attack, Ralph ducked slightly and brought his arm up to block the kick. The impact alone was enough to bruise the skin. "The same trick won't work on me twice Roger! You'll have to do better!" Ralph shouted with a new confidence. Roger's hair had flown over his face, but his sharp grin was still visible. "I know," he said slyly.

The next thing Ralph knew, Roger's other leg had flown into the air and locked around his arm. He momentarily let go as his body flipped forwards, and his long tree like limbs wrapped around Ralph's neck. Ralph got another brief glimpse of Roger's fangs before Roger rolled his body onto the ground and propelled Ralph forward with the sheer strength of his legs.

Ralph could hear a ringing in his ears as he landed cheek first against the concrete. The entire room seemed to shift and roll his body around. The idea of such an easy defeat was embarrassing even now, but Ralph had always relied on just the force of his arms while Roger seemed capable of using his entire body as one functioning weapon. The pair of heavy boots was closing in and Ralph could see his own blood decorating their ends.

"Honestly," Roger began as he pulled Ralph to his feet, "I thought you would put up much more of a fight."

"I never said I was finished."

Ralph broke the grasp of Roger's hands and quickly began analyzing anything he knew about Roger's body. He was tall and thin, but seemed to have amazing muscle strength and flexibility. _No good there. _His teeth looked extremely sharp and his eyes were equally dangerous. _Still nothing._

He put his arms up just before another swift kick would have connected with his face. _Come on…think._ Ralph ducked as Roger doubled his step and swung his other foot around. His fists began lunging forward, slowly attempting to weaken the left arm and completely destroy the right. Ignoring the constant pain, an idea came to Ralph. The same chilling image he'd recalled before played into his head, this time purposefully.

Roger had been shot through the chest, right into his heart! Even if the wound had healed, the area must still have some sort of weakness. Interrupting Roger's barrage, Ralph pushed out his arms and weaved in a few punches. He ignored the agony in his right arm and continued to watch Roger as he aimed for his body. The tall boy had a lot of body to cover, but his arms always remained close to the left side of his body, especially near the chest. _I knew it!_

Quickly devising a plan, Ralph pretended to be thrown off by a push. Roger used the space between them to gain enough momentum to lift both feet in the air and kick towards Ralph. _I've got you now Roger._ Leaning his body back, Ralph waited until Roger's legs were above his body. He then gripped them with his arms as tightly as he could and used their weight to push in the opposite direction and slam Roger onto his back.

He immediately ground his knees into the tan arms that had spread out on the floor. Before Roger could pull his body in, Ralph brought his hands together and hammered them down on the spot above Roger's heart. Letting out a cry, Roger's back arched and then collapsed into the ground. "T…Thank god," Ralph found himself saying aloud, dragging his fists up and jumping back from the stunned body. Knowing he only had a small amount of time, Ralph began limping towards Jack's body.

After walking a few meters away from Roger, Ralph could hear a hissing sound. He stopped, rubbing his stinging face. "My ears are still ringing?" Suddenly, Roger's body was sliding between Ralph's legs. As soon as he stopped, Roger bent his elbows and lifted his strong body into the air. The last thing Ralph saw before he hit the ground was the curving design on Roger's boot.

Once his prey was on his back again, Roger lunged forward and landed on his hands and knees, bringing his face close enough so Ralph could feel the spiraling curls above him. "When you play a dangerous game, you should always be at least one hundred steps in front of your enemy. You think my old bullet wound is my weak spot? Ridiculous!"

One of Roger's hands moved back as he leaned even closer, looking into the pool of light within Ralph's eyes. "When I play with toys, I run them around first and see just how much damage they can take. What's the point of killing someone without torturing them first, right?"

Ralph refused to answer and attempted to lift his chin, but Roger's other hand wrapped around it. "Don't look away. I want to see the fear and pain in your eyes when I kill you. I want to watch you search for God as your life drains away."

Suddenly, Ralph heard his clothes tearing and a strange movement began near his chest. He looked at Roger in confusion as the lean figure stood up, revealing a triangular shaped knife dripping with red. "Wh…what?"

Ralph moved his strong hand towards the outside of his jacket. As he lifted it towards the light, he realized the same color was on his hand. "I know, I could have shot you," Roger began as he threw the knife aside and grinned at Ralph, "but I think this is much more fitting for someone like you."

At the sight of blood, Ralph's body immediately began panicking. He couldn't even feel the wound, but his entire body was trembling at the thought of death. As Roger waited, Ralph tilted his head up, trying to hold back tears. _I don't…understand…_Numbness seemed to be setting in and Ralph almost hoped for pain. At least then he would know he was dying.

A rope hanging from the ceiling had caught his eye and he watched it in an attempt to ignore Roger. It swayed back and forth like a dancing snake. Maybe it was from God, calling Ralph to escape the cruel world he lay in. _I failed…_Suddenly, a black figure began shifting down the rope. There was a silver shine that inched closer and closer. His eyes were watering, but it seemed too clear to be a vision. The figure moved down faster, but was silent. Roger hadn't seemed to notice it, but Ralph soon discovered his eyes weren't playing tricks on him. _N…Nicol?!_

Ralph though Nicol had abandoned him after their argument, but the mysterious boy was sliding down the rope cradling a gun. It was hard not to stare, but Ralph knew Roger would discover him soon. As soon as their eyes seemed to meet, Nicol signaled Ralph. He pointed towards Roger and then motioned with his hand. Although he was unsure, Ralph tried to use the only part of his body that still functioned, his mouth.

"Roger, can I ask you one thing…before I go?"

Still proud of his victory, Roger nodded and smiled.

"Did Jack ever tell you he loved you?"

Ralph shut his dreary eyes for a second, but knew the reaction. He may not have been able to physically harm his heart, but Roger's emotions were as vulnerable as anyone's.

"Of course not," Roger responded, trying to sound unbothered, "Our relationship didn't call for such stupid things. I'm surprised you'd be thinking about this considering you're just about dead."

Ralph glanced back to Nicol, whose legs were close to touching the ground.

"Yeah, sorry. I guess I was just asking because I keep thinking about all the things he said to me before he left. It seemed like every time we spoke, he would say something like that. I never even asked for it, he just did it."

Roger's attention was fixated on Ralph as he continued. "Even the way he touched me seemed to say it. He reassured me that even if no one else in this world cared for me, he did. Honestly…"

Nicol's right foot was touching the ground. "What?" Roger demanded as Ralph trailed off for a moment.

"Honestly, I wonder how you'll move on. You got your revenge on me, but Jack's not even here to see it. Once we're gone, who in this world will care that you exist? I know people will be crying for me and that Jack's waiting for me in a better place, but what are you left with?"

Both of Nicol's feet were on planted on the floor. Ralph put his hands against his bloody jacket and sighed contently. He couldn't tell if he was acting or being serious, but he'd never felt more willing to express himself.

"We're not on the island anymore, but we're still fighting for something. Jack fought to be with me and I fought to free him from you. But you Roger, you don't even know what you're fighting for. One day, you'll wake up and find yourself completely alone and misunderstood."

Roger's eyes were hidden in his hair, but his nails dug so deep into his hands that blood began dripping down. Pausing, Ralph noticed that Nicol was leaning on the rope, listening with a solemn expression. Ralph widened his eyes, begging for him to hurry. Nodding, Nicol silently shifted towards Roger as Ralph finished his statement.

"You won the battle, but we won the war. I pray to God that you never find happiness."

Just before Nicol's arm came down, Ralph got a glimpse of the first hurt expression Roger had ever shown to him. The red in his eyes disappeared. They were simply black and soulless. _Bye._

The beast fell as soon as Nicol's gun struck the back of his head. Ralph let out a breath, smiling gratefully as Nicol approached.

"You made it just in time."

"I always do," Nicol responded, unbuttoning Ralph's coat.

"Don't bother. I can't feel anything anyway. I think it's over. Jack's gone anyway, so what's the point…?"

To Ralph's surprise, Nicol laughed and pulled open the jacket. Reaching into one of the pockets, he pulled out the two books that Ralph had received from Jack.

"What are you doing?"

Nicol turned them towards Ralph, revealing a hole that the knife had made.

"You're a great actor Ralph. If I hadn't have known, I would have thought you'd be dead for real."

Stunned, Ralph watched as Nicol opened the hardcover of the small bible. Pulling back a thick covering, he revealed a bag of red substance. "It may not be able to block a bullet, but a thick little book like this could definitely absorb a knife wound. It barely even reached your other book, but you still get a friction that your little friend over here may have believed was your muscle tearing apart. Luckily, he used a wider blade that wasn't as long, and he cut right through the bag so the knife looked like it was covered in your blood."

"Then how come I can't feel anything?"

"This place is freezing, what do you expect? You're rolling around on a wet floor and getting thrown into concrete. Your body was probably already in shock from that arm of yours, but it just made you all the more believable."

Nicol pulled Ralph to his feet and helped him put his coat back on, looking down at Roger. "He'll be out for awhile, but I'd rather not wait for him to wake up."

They both looked a little farther to the other body that still lay motionless. "Is he really…?"

Following Nicol to the body, Ralph anxiously watched as the boy put his hand on Jack's wrist.

"There's nothing."

Nicol stepped back as Ralph kneeled and tightly embraced Jack's body. He was still so handsome, but seemed like nothing more than a shell. "I'm so sorry I didn't make it in time. Please Jack…" Even though wishing and praying was pointless, Ralph still pleaded with the rest of his strength for more time.

"We have to go," Nicol reminded softly, bending down to lift up Jack. Ralph put a hand out, struggling to his feet. "I…I'll carry him."

Sighing, Nicol moved out of the way as Ralph stumbled towards the door, gently holding Jack's long body in his arms. He still felt numb and barely noticed the rush of wind and water that welcomed him outside. "We only have a block to go. Sage will meet us and get us back from there," Nicol said, walking behind Ralph to make sure he didn't fall. _Hang on. I promise it's not over yet…_

All he did was walk. He didn't count the steps he took or look anywhere else but the pale face resting against his chest. The only reason Ralph stopped to get into the car was because Nicol's hand gently guided him there. Sage and Nicol spoke to each other quietly as the car moved, but everything was drowned out. The rest of the way, Ralph nestled Jack in his arms, silently repeating to himself. _I care…I love you…so please…come back…_

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Author's Note: This chapter turned out a lot longer than I thought it would. It almost sounds like an ending, but I assure you, it's not! This chapter kind of puts everything into perspective for the future. I think I used Ralph a little better in this chapter, and I'm always happy to write using Roger and Nicol. Hopefully you'll await the next chapter that opens up to the actual plans and in depth relationships and hopefully I'll find the time to write more!


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